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Live A Happy & Successful Life You’ve Always Imagined With These 4 Simple Steps

Live A Happy & Successful Life You’ve Always Imagined With These 4 Simple Steps

Happiness and success are both subjective. There is no doubt about that. Despite having vastly different standards, few would be bold enough to call themselves happy and successful in life. So many of us set out to accomplish great deeds, only to be floored by the numerous meticulous tasks and ended up scurrying back with our tails between our legs, defeated.

Our goals became but words on a document. We keep telling ourselves “I will do this some time later”, then completely forget about them a few weeks later. Olin Miller had it right –

“If you want to make an easy job seem mighty hard, just keep putting off doing it.”

It is time to change, and there is no time better than now. But how?

The Westenberg Framework

Jon Westenberg is an entrepreneur, comedian, and writer. He also launched a coaching program to help people build their roadmap in life. Earlier in September last year, he introduced his life-changing framework in his article How To Invest In Yourself on Medium. With four simple steps, he set out to become more productive, efficient, and regret-free.

Let’s get a summary of what you can do!

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Step 1: A list of 100 things

In the first step, he said with much conviction –

“It’s not a bucket list, it’s not things I wish I could do — it’s things I really am going to do.”

Put down 100 things that you wanted to do but are not completely out of reach. It can be anything. From “finding a company” to “going surfing in Montauk” to “replacing the furniture at home” – it’s up to you. Just remember, these are things that you will eventually tick off your list. These are things you have always wanted to do but just never really had time for. This is a plan instead of a mirage.

Then, divide them into three categories:

  1. Things that I need skills for
  2. Things that I can do immediately
  3. Things that I need time for

    Tip: As you would see in this excerpt of my list, there are things that lie in between needing skills or time. Just think of it this way: the things that need time are those that you already have the ability to do but either takes a long time to complete or cannot be done right now.

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    There, the first step – done. Not bad, right?

    Step 2: A skill chart

    There are things on your list that you would need to acquire certain knowledge before you can complete them.

    If you want to build a mobile app, you need to know how to code. If you wish to make a cake for your mom on her birthday, you need to learn how to bake. If you want to write a poem to propose to your girlfriend, you need to master rhyme schemes, meter, and imagery.

    To keep track of the skills you need to learn, create a spreadsheet and put down the following into four columns:

    1. A column that lists the skills you have to learn
    2. A column for Research
    3. A column for Action
    4. A column for Progress

    Research and write down the things that you need to do to learn the skill in the “Action” column. Then, in the “Progress” column, estimate how far you are from learning the skill. For example, one of my goals is to relearn the piano after dropping it for five years. The “actions” I would need to complete in order to achieve this goal are things like learning the music theory, practicing the method books such as scales and sight-reading, etc.

    Personally though, I merged the “Research” and “Action” column to save time. When you completed one task, simply add an asterisk (or any way you would prefer) to said task in the column.

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    There is just one thing to note here: be honest. You may start slowly, but the pace will pick up as you get more used to the methodical approach towards learning different skills.

    Step 3: Immediate action

    You will have things on your list that can be accomplished right here, right now. Yet somehow, you never got to do it. Be it painting your room another color, or getting a new keyboard for your computer, these things are easy.

    So make a plan and get them done.

    They might be easy. They might be meager. They might not hold much significance.

    But accomplishing simple things like writing in the journal every day gives me the drive to tackle the more difficult tasks, such as studying literature and writing a book. That’s because every time I completed one of these tasks, it gave me a small sense of achievement, and as the list of completed things grows, so does your confidence.

    Step 4: The things you need time for.

    Finally, we have come to the things that would take relatively more time and patience. It may be learning how to play Mozart or Beethoven. It might be writing a book. Regardless, it requires the one thing you lack the most: time.

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    “Our schedules are already filled to the brim!” You protested vehemently.

    The way to tackle this is surprisingly easy. Spend a day taking detailed notes of how you’ve spent your time. You will notice that a lot of your time is wasted on things that are not particularly helpful towards completing your goals. I realized, halfway through, that I spend more than 2 to 3 hours scrolling through Facebook mindlessly on a regular day. Are you doing the same thing?

    Work to make it suit you.

    Like I said earlier on, this is merely a framework. There is no need to follow it to the letter. Feel free to edit and customize it to suit your needs. But don’t stop there. Take initiative to make your life as enjoyable as possible, because –

    “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”

    ― Mae West

    Featured photo credit: Aeipathy via aeipathyattire.com

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    Eamon Suen

    Student, The Hong Kong University of Science and Technology

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    Last Updated on November 15, 2018

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

    As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

    The Success Mindset

    Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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    The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

    The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

    The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

    How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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    How To Create a Success Mindset

    People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

    1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

    How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

    A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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    There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

    2. Look For The Successes

    It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

    3. Eliminate Negativity

    You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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    When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

    4. Create a Vision

    Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

    If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

    An Inspirational Story…

    For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

    What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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