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Your Face Doesn’t Tell Your Attractiveness, This Factor Counts More

Your Face Doesn’t Tell Your Attractiveness, This Factor Counts More

Ever wondered why there are some people who fit into the convention of beauty and yet are not as popular as opposed to an average Jill or Joe, who garners far more attention? The secret to attractiveness doesn’t lie in your features, your clothes or even your groomed personality. It lies in your emotions!

What’s The Measure of Attractiveness?

New research by Silke Anders, a professor of Social and Affective Neuroscience at the University of Lübeck, indicates that most people are drawn to people who understand their emotions the best.[1] So basically, if someone ‘gets’ us, we find them attractive. And the opposite is also true.

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The more certain we are of thinking that we know what the other person is feeling; the more attracted we are to him, or her. It’s about the sending of emotional signals and of perceiving them – which sounds pretty simple in theory but is often not. Most of us tend to hide the visual cues of our emotions and become pretty adept at it. But it’s this very quality that becomes a roadblock in our levels of attractiveness. To be more attractive to others, we need to be more of an open book than a secretive one and let people see what we are feeling by facial cues.

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Can This Quality Be Adapted?

To make yourself more attractive to others, you need to project your emotions as clearly as possible. The more comprehensible emotions that you project to others, the more your levels of attractiveness increase – if a person is able to judge what you are feeling accurately because of your clear emotional projection, then his or her brain’s reward system fires up and in doing so – makes you more attractive  in that person’s eyes. Remember that this is not an advice to let the waterworks flow; just don’t try to be stoic all the time. Let those lips droop when sad, or those eyes sparkle in happiness – the more people are able to read you, the more attractive they will find you.

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A Last Bit of Advice

Instead of letting the whole world and sundry see what we are feeling, perhaps it better to let our guard down when with someone that we find attractive, and who we want to perceive our attractiveness. And once in a relationship, it’s a good thing to keep working at our emotional projection then too – for we want our significant others to keep perceiving our attractiveness in a good, healthy way…

Featured photo credit: Rocksana Rocksana via unsplash.com

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Reference

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Rima Pundir

Health, Wellness & Productivity Writer

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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