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Last Updated on January 3, 2018

If You Understand These 5 Rules In Psychology, You Can Live A Much Easier Life

If You Understand These 5 Rules In Psychology, You Can Live A Much Easier Life

Understanding the psychology of ourselves and others around us can play a huge part in our happiness. We are all suffering from limiting beliefs gained from past experiences and interactions with others inhibiting the ease with which we live our lives. Whether it’s believing we aren’t good enough because we’re told we should be at a certain point in our lives by a certain time, bringing about feelings of failure, or simply misunderstanding others’ intentions or reactions to us, we need to get into a better mindset that will straighten out our perceptions and limit the amount of negativity that we see and think about ourselves.

Making a habit of using these psychological rules is crucial to living an easier life and will help you to see the world in a whole new light.

1. People Don’t Care As Much As You Think

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    It may sound harsh, but essentially it’s true. Being so caught up in what others think of us or acting in a way that will meet (what we think are) other people’s expectations is detrimental to us because everyone is wrapped up in their own problems and insecurities.

    It’s much better to try to keep this in mind, as most of what we believe people are thinking are only assumptions our own minds create based on past experiences or incorrect perceptions and interpretations. Being yourself without worrying what others think will go a long way in achieving personal happiness.

    2. We Are Constantly Changing Who We Are

    It’s easy to think that we are the same person we were ten years ago and will be thinking and feeling the same in another ten years, but we’re not. Our past, present and future selves are all essentially independent because our mindsets change with our lives’ circumstances and experiences.

    Because of this, we should always be true to our present selves when making decisions. We can never predict what our future self will think and feel, and everything that happened in the past was for our past selves. The power is all in the now.

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    3. Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

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      With social media pressuring many of us to post the best moments, it can be easy to start comparing ourselves to others’ seemingly ‘perfect’ lives. In real life, we still tend to show our best side to people rather than showing vulnerability out of fear of being judged or rejected.

      The truth is we are all vulnerable. We all want to be accepted by others. It is a huge waste of time to believe that people are somehow better than us and have their life sorted out, while seeing us for who we really are. Comparisons and feeling inferior to other people is futile because even the most powerful people have worries, insecurities and uncertainties inside them.

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      4. Don’t Assume Your Advice Will Be Listened To

      Ever seen a friend’s glaring problem and know what they need to do to sort it out? You give advice but it just seems to fall on deaf ears. You feel frustrated because, after all, you just want to help them. The thing is, no one ever really listens to advice unless they happen to be in the right mindset at the right time.

      At the end of the day, people will only change their mindsets or outlooks through their own realisations and experiences. Sometimes it may come in the form of your advice but most of the time it needs to happen for them at their own pace. Don’t feel ignored or disheartened – you did your bit, now let them work it out.

      5. You Can Only Control Your Response

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        How you react to a problem, event or situation is much more important than the situation itself. In life, attitude is everything in how happy you become overall. You can choose to react in a way that will ricochet throughout your future thoughts, feelings and emotions or choose to acknowledge a better way.

        In any negative situation, this can be hard, but remembering to take yourself out of it for a few seconds and reset your mind before reacting can help you train yourself to understand the possible repercussions for others and yourself.

        Featured photo credit: Julian Jagtenberg via pexels.com

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        Jenny Marchal

        Freelance Writer

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        Last Updated on August 15, 2018

        What Makes a Relationship Boring and How to Avoid It

        What Makes a Relationship Boring and How to Avoid It

        You’ve finally reached that comfortable spot in your relationship. You finish each other’s sentences and know before they order what the other one will have for lunch at your favorite restaurant. But, it’s starting to feel like boredom to you.

        Video Summary

        Security Can Lead to Boredom

        It is normal to reach this level of security in a relationship. The longer you’re with somebody, the more you get to know them and what to expect from them. This level of familiarity is the cause of relationship boredom.

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        Although security is definitely something you want with your significant other, what you don’t want is the boredom. One of the biggest mistakes a couple can make is believing that their predictability makes up for the loss of intimacy or excitement they used to feel together.[1] Why? Because this boredom increases your chances of losing the love between you.

        When a couple starts to settle for feeling safe and secure, they believe nothing in the world can tear them apart. And this sense of confidence means they often stop putting effort into their relationship. Instead, their shared life becomes automatic, occurring without too much thought or investment and becoming indifferent. The last thing you want is to be in an indifferent romantic relationship. With indifference comes a whole slew of other feelings like annoyance and irritation, which in turn, prompts arguments.[2]

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        Don’t allow this to happen to you and your significant other.

        How to Prevent Boredom in Your Relationship

        So, what can you do to avoid boredom in your relationship? Here are some great ideas to spark the passion and excitement:

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        Try Something New Together

        There’s nothing better for breaking up monotony than doing something new together. Do you two love taking pictures? Take a photography class together. Do you usually go hiking on the weekends? Throw a zipline or paragliding session into the mix. Research indicates that trying new activities is a great way to beat boredom.

        Make a Plan for the Future

        No, you don’t have to plan where you’ll buy your house or how many kids you’ll have if you’re not ready for that sort of conversation. You can, however, plan a weekend getaway or a vacation for a few months down the road. Making a plan gives you something to look forward to, which helps fight boredom. According to life coach Kelly Rogers, making plans for the future gives your relationship a little adrenaline rush, making you feel a sense of appreciation for each other.[3]

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        Establish a Date Night

        In your everyday, mundane life together, it can be easy to forget to make the two of you a priority. Establishing a mandatory date night is a wonderful way to bring you and your significant other together for some quality time. Melanie Schilling, a relationship psychologist, claims that date nights are actually critical to relationship health.[4] Set something specific to do together as often as your schedule allows. It doesn’t have to be dinner at an expensive restaurant either. You can plan a “no cell phone” night, a walk at the park, or even try to recreate one of your first dates together.

        Remember to Say “I Love You”

        Don’t forget to remind your partner why you are together, especially when boredom creeps its head between you two. Simple things like saying, “I love you” or letting them know how much you appreciate them can help you keep the romance alive in your relationship. Try to think about the happy memories the two of you have shared; it can be far too easy to dwell on the problems. Remembering why and how much you love your significant other is a great way to forget about any boredom you thought you were feeling.

        Reference

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