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6 Struggles A 30-Something Woman Has When She Is Not Sure She’s Ready For A Baby

6 Struggles A 30-Something Woman Has When She Is Not Sure She’s Ready For A Baby

For a man, the big 3-0 is a time of joy as he is wiser, more handsome, and if he’s lucky, he’s also richer. But for a woman, the big round number comes with other joys: sexual maturation, an amazing sense of style and fashion, and the delight of knowing what she wants. Except, when it comes to having a baby.

You know, at 30, a woman’s biological clock begins ticking really loudly. 30 is the age when women start to worry about the number of their eggs and start visualizing the grim possibility of never becoming a mother. But what if that strong, confident, wise 30-something woman is not sure that she even wants to have a baby? Therein lies the struggle.

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1. You Get Pressured by Family

After your 30th birthday, all your family starts to put pressure on you to have a baby. If two weeks ago your parents and older siblings were talking to you about date rape drugs, now they are talking about your fertility and why you’re not doing anything with it. You’re going to hear “90% of your eggs are gone by your 30th birthday,” way too many times. And while you do know they might be right, you’re just not ready to hear it.

2. Your Mind Switches Between Two Extremes

When you can’t sleep or when you see a pregnant woman, your mind starts switching between two horror stories. There are the stories about 20-something-year-old women who struggle to have a baby and fail and there are the stories about 50-something-year-old women who manage to give birth by a miracle. Your mind will continue to switch between these two extremes for a long time to come, putting more pressure on you.

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3. You Have a Fear of Missing Out

A 30-something woman is going to see her childhood friends filling their social media accounts with pictures of their kids. Playing into this is scientifically proven to lead to depression, especially if you want to have a baby, but you are not ready yet. In most cases, if one of your friends has a baby, she will gradually distance herself from you and all the other women who don’t have kids, as your main discussion topics will start to change. Watching all those pictures of kids online is going to produce a feeling of emptiness, urging the ticking of your biological clock, even if you are not ready for this yet.

4. You Buy Pregnancy Tests

As result of all the pressure put on you, you are most likely going to stock up on commercial pregnancy tests and learn everything about a homemade pregnancy tests. Some women also end up downloading apps to calculate the time of the month where they are at their most fertile based on their cycle, while others ask their partners to eat cleaner and give up on all their bad habits, such as smoking.

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5. You Eat All The Foods Forbidden During Pregnancy

Despite stocking up on pregnancy tests, as a 30-something who is still undecided on having kids, you are going to eat as many forbidden pregnancy foods as possible. This is partially due to the pressure put on you from everyone and partially because you know that once you become pregnant, you won’t be able to eat those foods for the next nine months.

6. You Admire Yourself in Front of a Mirror

This is a classic sign of a woman who is not yet ready to become a mother, and at the same time, one who definitely does want to have a baby. While in front of your mirror with a pillow under your shirt as a belly, after hours of admiring that false baby bump, you might decide to conceive that night. In the end, however, you are still not sure about the reality of having a baby. A pillow baby is one thing, but a real human life is a completely different committment altogether.

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If you find that you’ve missed your period, you will eventually use one of those pregnancy tests. When you do, you will really find out if you are ready for a baby. If the second line fails to appear and you release a big sigh of relief, you weren’t ready yet and you should just wait for the right moment to try for a baby.

Having a baby is not a decision to make because everyone else is doing it or because your parents are pushing you and you feel pressured. Don’t let anyone push you into motherhood. When it is the right moment, you will know, because conceiving will come smoothly and naturally. No force necessary.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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Published on November 7, 2018

How to Homeschool in the 21st Century (For All Types of Parents & Kids)

How to Homeschool in the 21st Century (For All Types of Parents & Kids)

In 2016, it was estimated that 1.7 million children were being homeschooled in the U.S, roughly 3.3% of all school-aged children.[1] Although this may not sound like a big portion of the population, the growth rate of homeschooling has been 7 to15% per year for the last two decades.

The burgeoning numbers are not a coincidence. There are tremendous benefits to homeschooling, including one-on-one teaching, adaptability to individual needs and learning styles, a safe learning environment, encouraging learning for knowledge rather than grades, and tailoring a curriculum to the child’s interests.

Is homeschooling something that you have been considering for your family? With all of the tools and resources available for homeschoolers in the 21st century, it may be easier than you think.

How to Homeschool (Getting Started)

After thinking it through, you’ve decided that homeschooling is the right step for you and your family. Now what? Here are the first things you should do to get your homeschooling journey started on the right track.

Figure Out the Laws

Homeschooling is regulated by the state, not the federal government. The first step is to find the current and accurate legal requirements mandated by your state in order to educate your child legally.[2]

The regulations can vary widely, from strict guidelines to no guidelines at all. However, don’t be overwhelmed by the legal jargon. There are many resources and local communities for homeschooling families that can help you figure out the logistics.

Decide on an Approach

Every child’s needs are different. This is your chance to choose the homeschooling style or combination of styles that best fits your child’s learning style and interests. A brief description of seven different homeschooling methods are listed below.

Supplies/Resources

Often times, purchasing a homeschooling curriculum is done too early in the planning process, resulting in buyer’s remorse.

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A curriculum is not always needed for homeschooling, and other types of free or less structured resources are readily available.

Find a Community

Getting connected with a community of homeschoolers is one of the most important parts of building a successful and thriving homeschool environment for your kids.

Look for communities online for virtual support or a local group that you and your kids can interact with. Partnering with others fosters better socialization skills for the students and provides opportunities for field trips, classes, and outings that wouldn’t have otherwise been a part of the homeschooling experience.

7 Different Homeschooling Methods

1. School-At-Home

Also known as Traditional homeschool, School-At-Home uses essentially the same curriculum as the local private or public school but at home.

The lessons can be completed independently, but more commonly, they are administered by a parent or a teacher-facilitated online school.

  • Benefits: formal standards, wide selection of curricula, same pace as peers, short-term friendly
  • Drawbacks: expensive, inflexible, time consuming, parent can get easily burnt out
  • Resources: K12, Time4Learning, Abeka

2. Classical

One of the most popular homeschooling methods used, it borrows educational practices from Ancient Greece and Rome. Subject areas are studied chronologically so that students can understand the consequence of ideas over time.

Socratic dialogue fosters effective discussions and debate to achieve beyond mere comprehension. There is often a strong emphasis on Great Books[3] as well as Greek and Latin.

3. Unit Studies

Rather than breaking up education into subjects, unit studies approach each topic as a whole, studying it from the perspective of each subject area.

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For example, a unit study about animals could include reading books about animals, learning about the classification of animals, figuring out which animals live on which continents, etc. This method is often used as a technique in other more comprehensive educational methodologies.

  • Benefits: promotes thinking about concepts as a whole, not monotonous or redundant, student-directed, bolsters weaker subject areas, beneficial for teaching multi-age students
  • Drawbacks: incomplete, knowledge gaps, curriculum-dependent
  • Resources: Unit Study, Unit Studies, Unit Studies Made Easy, Konos

4. Charlotte Mason

This Christian homeschooling style utilizes shorts periods of study (15-20 minute max for elementary, 45 minute max for high school), along with nature walks and history portfolios.

Students are encouraged to practice observation, memorization, and narration often. With a focus on “living books” (stories with heroes, life lessons, socio-ethical implications), reading plays a big role in this student-paced teaching style.

5. Montessori

Maria Montessori developed this method through working with special needs children in the early 20th century.

With a primary focus on the student setting the pace and indirect instruction from the teacher, this approach includes free movement, large unstructured time blocks (up to 3 hours), multi-grade classes, and individualized learning plans based on interests.

6. Unschooling

Unschooling is a learning model largely based on the work of John Holt.[4] The teaching style focuses mainly on the students’ interests, putting priority on experiential, activity-based, and learn as you go approaches.

For basic skills such as reading, writing, and math, a systematic technique is employed, but testing and evaluations are typically not utilized. Teachers, in general, play more of a facilitator role.

7. Eclectic/Relaxed

As the most popular method of homeschool, eclectic homeschooling is child-directed, resourceful, and non-curriculum based.

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Parents can sample any combination of homeschooling methods and styles or resources. One growing sector of eclectic homeschooling combines part homeschooling with part traditional schooling.

How to Facilitate Homeschooling with Technology

One of the reasons homeschooling is more feasible than ever before is due to the accessibility of tools and resources to enhance the learning process.

Email

Email is a tool that has really stood the test of time. Invented in 1972, it is still used today as a primary means of communicating on the Internet.

It is a great way to share assignments, links, and videos between parent and student.

Google Drive/Calendar

Google Drive offers a multitude of essential programs that can come in handy for homeschoolers, such as Docs, Sheets, Slides, and more.

With its sharing capabilities, easy accessibility, and auto-save ability, it’s easier than ever to organize and complete assignments. It will improve students’ writing and typing skills, as well as eliminate the need for paper.

Google Calendar is an excellent tool for tracking assignment due dates, planning field trips and activities, and developing time management skills.

Ebooks

Rather than invest in physical copies of books, ebooks are a wonderful option for saving money and space. There are plenty of places that offer a free or paid subscription to a wide selection of ebooks:

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E-Courses

When a structured curriculum is necessary for teaching a certain topic, an e-course is the way to go.

From watercolors to calculus, there are e-courses available about almost everything. Including different teaching styles that vary from the parents will encourage students to learn in different ways.

The visual and auditory stimulation will also be beneficial in helping students understand and retain the concepts being taught.

Some recommendations:

Youtube

Youtube is not just a platform for music videos and cats doing funny things. There are a number of Youtube channels that produce quality educational videos, free of charge.

Creating a playlist of videos for various topics is a great way to supplement a homeschool education.

Some recommendations:

Final Thoughts

Homeschooling in the current age looks much different than it did ten years ago. There are more options and more flexibility when it comes to educating kids at home.

Don’t be overwhelmed by the idea of homeschooling your children if it could make a positive impact on your family.

Featured photo credit: Hal Gatewood via unsplash.com

Reference

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