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Worst Mistakes People Make In Their 20s That You Can Actually Avoid

Worst Mistakes People Make In Their 20s That You Can Actually Avoid

Going through your 20s can be really difficult – I know, I’ve been there. You’re legally an adult but haven’t quite reached that level emotionally yet. You’re still trying to find your way through the messiness and complications of life and figure out who you really are. Don’t worry, everything you’re feeling is normal.

Through all of the confusion, it can be easy to make some really life-changing mistakes. Don’t let that happen to you. Take a look below at some of the worst mistakes people make in their 20s and find out how to avoid doing the same.

1. Relying On Education Alone

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    We’ve all heard it before: “Get an education and you’ll go far in life.” So, we spend our 20s focused on college credits and getting good grades. If this sounds familiar, you might want to rethink your approach.

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    A formal education can only help you to a certain extent. Believe me, you should be learning so many other important things right now. Travel, learn a new language, volunteer, do an internship. These are all things that will help you in the future and supplement the formal education you are now receiving.

    To figure out just what you would like to do, try reading some self-help books. Here’s a link to get you started:

    2. Hanging On To A Partner Just Because You Want Them To Be Your Last

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      Falling in love is one of the most amazing things we can experience in our lives. But forcing an unhealthy relationship is one of the most harmful.

      During your 20s, while you’re trying to “figure it all out”, you’ll probably be getting out there and meeting new people. Sometimes, you find your significant other in the process. But don’t hang on to a partner just because you want them to be your last.

      I say this, because I’ve been through it. I spent the better part of my 20s holding on to a relationship that wasn’t healthy because I didn’t realize who I was or what I needed in my life. Don’t do the same thing.

      Reevaluate your relationship from time to time to make sure it makes you happy. Stay alert for early warning signs like controlling behavior or violent arguments. Remember, it’s hard to find your soulmate while you’re still trying to figure out what you want out of life.

      3. Neglecting Your Health

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        Don’t neglect your health during your 20s. You’re so busy taking care of work, school, relationships, and socializing that it’s easy to forget to take care of your mental and physical health as well.

        It’s understandable. You’re so busy trying to pack as much into your days as possible, which is exactly what you should be doing. But don’t forget to make some time for your health, too.

        To help point you in the right direction, take a look at some of these articles on healthy living:

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        4. Taking Your Parents for Granted

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          I know it doesn’t seem like a very likely scenario right now, but you will not always have your parents. Imagining life without one or both parents is difficult. Right now, any time you need help or feel stressed out, they are there for you. But, one day they will be gone.

          Of all of the mistakes mentioned, this is the most serious. I lost my mother in my 20s and it was one of those completely unexpected losses. We were talking on the phone after not seeing each other for a few weeks and we decided to do something together the next day. I woke up to a phone call telling me that she had passed away.

          You never get to go back and do it all over. Take advantage of the time you have with them now. Don’t take your parents for granted. In fact, as soon as you finish reading this article, give them a call. Make a coffee date or go catch a movie together. Spend your next vacation together. One day, you’ll look back on that time together and be grateful you had it.

          Featured photo credit: Unsplash via pexels.com

          More by this author

          Amber Pariona

          EFL Teacher, Lifehack Writer, English/Spanish Translator, MPA

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          Last Updated on January 18, 2019

          7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

          7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

          Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

          But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

          If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

          1. Limit the time you spend with them.

          First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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          In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

          Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

          2. Speak up for yourself.

          Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

          3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

          This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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          But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

          4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

          Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

          This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

          Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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          5. Change the subject.

          When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

          Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

          6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

          Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

          I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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          You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

          Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

          7. Leave them behind.

          Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

          If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

          That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

          You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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