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The Best and Worst Feelings you Have in Your Late 20’s

The Best and Worst Feelings you Have in Your Late 20’s

If you are past your late 20’s, congratulations. You made it! If you have not yet passed it, you will make it. I have and it was not easy, but you will make it. This stage can have a lot of ups and downs, as well as lefts and rights. It can get complicated and confusing, but at the same time it can also be great.

The data science team from the happiness app, Happify has found that there was a sharp increase in stress levels of the members who joined their service in 2015 who were in their late 20’s and early 30’s.

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Here are some examples of the best and worst feelings that happen when you are in your late 20’s:

1. Best feeling: You’ve taken more control of your life compared to your early 20’s.

Your early to middle 20’s is when you probably started your first job after college. At this point, you have started earning your own money and paying off your debts. This continues into your late 20’s, and as the debts get lower and the job gets more stable, you are probably already saving up for that big travel adventure or for that big downpayment to buy your first house. At this point, you feel that you are in control.

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Worst feeling: You’re going to lose some control of your life soon, as family issues (especially if you’re going to have kids or your parents have health issues) very likely will come up.

However, at this point in your late 20’s when you feel that you are finally in control of your own life, other issues over which you have no control can arise. Examples of these are stress from parents’ health issues or having kids, and then having unexpected expenses arise due to these situations.

2. Best feeling: You are realizing your ambitions step by step.

When you are in your late 20’s and in a job that you really like, you suddenly find yourself being grateful that, unlike your new co-workers who are fresh out of school and struggling to find their “root” job and what they really want, you have already found yours. You do not need to prove yourself anymore to anyone because being in your late 20’s has made you a much more confident person than you were before. You feel that you are all set for life.

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Worst feeling: You feel that you don’t have much time.

However, there will be sleepless nights when you feel that you do not have enough time to enjoy your success. You feel that most of your time is spent building a great future, but when will all the hard work stop?

3. Best feeling: You find yourself much more mature than before.

You give yourself a pat on the back and think that this is the most mature that you have been in your whole life. You know yourself better and you have endured a lot of ups and downs and have come out of it shining like a star. You think that you rock and you do not care anymore what others think of you. You have become strong and confident.

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Worst feeling: You feel that your body has matured a lot, too.

Mentally you are feeling confident, but when you look at yourself in the mirror you suddenly notice that some wrinkles have set in. The 5-kilometer run that used to make you feel energetic is suddenly making you feel like you can’t breathe. You feel your body changing and this makes you feel vulnerable.

4. Best feeling: You already know what you want.

You know that you want to work for the company that you are working for now until retirement. You know that you want to live in the country that you are currently living in. You know that you will need to get married in a few years- or now. You are set. You know what you want.

Worst feeling: You don’t feel like settling/you can’t settle.

On the flip side of knowing what you want, you feel that you do not want to settle. You know that if you settle, you could get bored, or end up hating what you thought you had wanted. Maybe you are scared that you will make the wrong decision. Then you get stuck because you do not want to decide just yet.

Yes, being in your late 20’s is a hard and complicated stage in life. What you can do is to use all of the resources that are there to help you. Talk to your parents, close friends, seek counseling, or read self-help books. Most importantly, remind yourself that what you are going through is normal and that there are many out there who are experiencing the same things.

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Sarah Bonander

Writer, Human Resources Professional

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

1. Become Grateful for Everything

When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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3. Help Others

Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

4. Change Your Thinking

We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

6. Get into Action

Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

You are responsible for your thoughts.

People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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