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5 Reasons Why I Decided to Build a Vlog Instead of Building a Life

5 Reasons Why I Decided to Build a Vlog Instead of Building a Life

If all goes well, I will be turning 30 next year. By normal social standards I will officially be in the age when people get married, reproduce or at least try desperately, and take on a mortgage to tie themselves to one place. When it comes to me, I ticked one of the above boxes. I got married to my best friend (no, literally). The one person who enjoys our wonderful weirdness and accepts me for who I really am. Other than that, I accomplished nothing.

Zero.

Nada.

No children, no savings, no capital, no real estate. I have a fair job and live in a rented house with a bunch of cats and the husband. Oh, and two cleaning robots. I dread to become one of those ‘’adulescents’’ (20+ adults living in their parent’s basements) who Professor Frank Furedi, a sociologist who has been studying this phenomenon, at the University of Kent once described in his statement as:

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“Our society is full of lost boys and girls hanging out at the edge of adulthood.”

The lost boys – and girls.

These ‘’adulescents’’ are generally defined as young people who are closing on or even passed 30 but refuse to settle down and make commitments, and would rather go on partying into middle age. While I really don’t feel like this is me, I have to admit I have nothing to show for proving the opposite. Even now, when I can count for potential savings at the end of each month. So much so, that we (as in Husband and moi) are slowly getting to the point where we can and should decide what we put our savings into. And that’s when all the scary questions pop up!

Do I start planning my adult life according to the written and unwritten social norms? Should we buy a house and settle in? Do we want children? How many? Where do we actually want to spend the rest of our lives? Do I see myself getting old here? Do I even see myself getting old?

There is so much push from society, mainly through the media. It’s overwhelming. All those ads about the best mortgage, the family car (with 0% down), the best ovulation predictor. Social media makes it even worse. All your friends are posting baby pictures, have move-in parties or complain on forums how pathetic all those other people are. It makes me feel like every second spent on not deciding is wasted. I will become the other people. The childless. The aimless. The houseless.

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After all, we women have a certain number of eggs, right? When it’s gone, it’s gone. A mortgage takes about 25 years to pay off. Will I even live that long? Time is ticking. It’s like I don’t have a purpose until I make the decision. This needed to stop before it drove me insane.

Do we need to decide?

The urge to decide, because we can decide. We have lots of choices. We are not limited to live in one country, we are not limited to one profession. Today we are living in a world where anyone can become pretty much anything. We don’t have to work towards pre-defined goals according to our class, gender or location. This gives us the widest palette of life goals and route choices. Actually, the decisions on whether to marry or not marry, start a family or not, travel or stay put, stick to your existing job or find a new one can make us overwhelmed, anxious and depressed. And this started happening to me, too. How did I shake it off?

I didn’t. But I took these steps to turn it around and this turned my life around completely, for the better. These are the reasons I went against modern day expectations and, well, started vlogging instead of starting a conventional, responsible adult life.

1. We travel.

lifewiththecats in Lanzarote
    in Lanzarote

    Last month me and my partner in crime (a.k.a. Husband) took all our savings and spent it on documenting our holiday. That’s right. We signed up for an expensive holiday, bought premium class plane tickets, bought the video gear and we left.

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    2. We keep learning.

    We learnt to use the new camera on the way out to our holiday and I learnt how to do the basics in a video editor in a hotel room. Since then, we learn with every new video we take. There is always something we don’t know how to do. We make mistakes. Every time a mistake is made we learn how to do it better next time.

    3. We made a commitment.

    To ourselves. We now spend our days gathering experiences. Instead of going straight home, we wander. Instead of saving for a car we are saving for a trip. Maybe we will see something vlog worthy, maybe we won’t, but whatever happens to us, stays with us. It becomes a part of us. It’s a shared memory to hold us together and to hold on to. So we scan events around us and we invest in new adventures. We go to places. We see something new one day after another. Our life has never been richer. Our bond has never been tighter.

    4. We have fun.

    And I think this is the most fun I’ve ever had. Also the steepest learning curve I ever had to deal with. It is really challenging and I keep making all the rookie mistakes but at the end of the day I feel accomplished. And feeling accomplished is fun. Sharing secret smiles is fun. Having inside jokes is fun. Thinking back being stuck in transit and skating through terminals, is fun.

    5. We dropped the anxiety of what’s next.

    This does not mean we don’t care, but since we have no assets there is a lot less to worry about. Also, once you decide to be this traveling-vlogging anti-adult, you set yourself up to be judged. Once you accept that, all that push coming from society won’t matter. Only what you really want to do, will. May that be travel, babies, overpriced shoes. It doesn’t matter, as long as it makes you happy, but you need to ask yourself the question if you are genuinely happy and you need to be honest. With yourself. This may be the hardest thing you ever need to do.

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    Lifewiththecats in Boston
      Boston

      As for us, instead of saving for a deposit for our forever home, we are, again, saving for a plane ticket. What will you do next?

      Featured photo credit: Anita Brayer from Lifewiththecats via lifewiththecats.com

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      Last Updated on November 11, 2019

      How to Improve Memory and Boost Your Brainpower

      How to Improve Memory and Boost Your Brainpower

      Have you ever noticed that some people are able to effortlessly remember even the most mundane details and quickly comprehend new things? Well, you can too!

      To unlock the full potential of your brain, you need to keep it active and acute. Wasting time on your couch watching mindless television shows or scrolling through facebook is not going to help.

      Besides getting out flashcards, what can you do to help remember things better and learn new things more quickly? Check out these 10 effective ways on how to improve memory:

      1. Exercise and Get Your Body Moving

      Exercising doesn’t just exercise the body, it also helps to exercise your brain. Obesity and the myriad of diseases that eventually set in as a result of being overweight can cause serious harm to the brain.

      Furthermore, without regular exercise, plaque starts to build up in your arteries, and your blood vessels begin to lose the ability to effectively pump blood. Plaque buildup leads to heart attacks and it also reduces the amount of oxygen and nutrients that your blood carries to your brain. When the nutrients don’t make it there, the brain’s ability to function is compromised.

      To prevent this from happening, make sure you get moving every day. Even if it’s just a brisk walk, it’ll help you maintain and increase your mental acuity. Brisk walking, swimming and dancing are all excellent activities. Take a look at these 5 Ways to Find Time for Exercise.

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      2. Eliminate Stressors and Seek Help If You’re Depressed

      Anything that causes you major stress, like anger or anxiety, will in time begin to eat away the parts of your brain that are responsible for memory. Amongst the most brain-damaging stressors is depression, which is actually often misdiagnosed a a memory problem since one of its primary symptoms is the inability to concentrate.

      If you can’t concentrate, then you might feel like you are constantly forgetting things. Depression increases the levels of cortisol in your bloodstream which elevates the cortisol levels in the brain. Doctors have found that increased cortisol diminishes certain areas of the brain, especially the hippocampus which is where short-term memories are stored.

      Prolonged depression can thus destroy your brain’s ability to remember anything new. Seek professional help to combat your depression – your brain will thank you.

      3. Get a Good Night’s Sleep and Take Naps

      Getting a consistent 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night will increase your memory. During sleep, the brain firms up memories of recently acquired information.

      Getting enough sleep will help you get through the full spectrum of nocturnal cycles that are essential to optimal brain and body functioning during the waking hours. Taking a nap throughout the day, especially after learning something new, can also help you to retain those memories as well as recharge your brain and keep it sharper longer.

      4. Feed Your Brain

      Fifty to sixty percent of the brain’s overall weight is pure fat, which is used to insulate its billions of nerve cells. The better insulated a cell is, the faster it can send messages and the quicker you will be thinking.

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      This is precisely why parents are advised to feed their young children whole milk and to restrict dieting – their brains’ need fat to grow and work properly. Skimping on fats can be devastating even to the adult brain.

      Thus, eating foods that contain a healthy mix of fats is vital for long-term memory. Some excellent food choices include fish (especially anchovies, mackerel and wild salmon) and dark leafy green vegetables. Here’re more brain food choices: 12 Foods that Can Improve Your Brain Power

      Deep-fried foods obviously contain fat but their lack of nutritional value is not going to help your brain or your body, so think healthy foods and fats.

      5. Eat Breakfast and Make Sure It Includes an Egg

      According to Larry McCleary, M.D., author of  The Brain Trust Program, an egg is the ideal breakfast. Eggs contain B vitamins which help nerve cells to burn glucose, antioxidants that protect neurons against damage; and omega-3 fatty acids that keep nerve cells firing at optimal speed.

      Other foods to add to your breakfast include fruits, veggies and lean proteins. Avoid trans fats and high fructose corn syrup. Trans fats diminish the brain cells’ ability to communicate with each other and HFCS can actually shrink the brain by damaging cells.

      Having a healthy breakfast in the morning has been shown to improve performance throughout the day. If you’re too busy to have a healthy breakfast, this maybe just right for you: 33 Quick And Healthy Breakfasts For Busy Mornings

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      6. Write it Down

      If there’s something you want to remember, writing it down can help.

      It may sound like a no-brainer, but do you really know why? Writing it down creates oxygenated blood flow to areas of your brain that a responsible for your memories and literally exercises those parts of it. Here’s How Writing Things Down Can Change Your Life.

      You can start a journal, write yourself emails or even start keeping a blog – all of these activities will help to improve your capacity to remember and memorize information.

      7. Listen to Music

      Research shows that certain types of music are very helpful in recalling memories. Information that is learned while listening to a particular song or collection can often be recalled by thinking of the song or “playing” it mentally. Songs and music can serve as cues for pulling up particular memories.

      8. Visual Concepts

      In order to remember things, many people need to visualize the information they are studying.

      Pay attention to photographers, charts and other graphics that might appear in your textbook; or if you’re not studying a book, try to pull up a mental image of what it is you are trying to remember. It might also help to draw your own charts or figures, or utilize colors and highlighters to group related ideas in your notes.

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      Here, you can learn How to Become a Person Who Can Visualize Results.

      9. Teach Someone Else

      Reading material out loud has been shown to significantly improve memory of the material. Expanding further upon this idea is the fact that psychologists and educators have found that by having students teach new concepts to others, it helps to enhance understanding and recall.

      Teach new concepts and information to a friend or study partner, and you’ll find you remember the information a lot better.

      10. Do Crossword Puzzles, Read or Play Cards

      Studies have shown that doing crossword puzzles, read or play cards on a daily basis not only keep your brain active but also help to delay memory loss, especially in those who develop dementia.

      So pick up the daily newspaper and work on that crossword puzzle, read a book or enjoy a game of solitaire.

      Pick one to two of these tips first and start applying them to your everyday life. Very soon you’ll find yourself having better memories and a clearer head!

      More About Boosting Memory

      Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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