Advertising
Advertising

7 Important Life Lessons Kick Boxing Has Taught Me

7 Important Life Lessons Kick Boxing Has Taught Me

Years of martial arts have taught me more than how to throw a good punch. Surprisingly it has taught me how to control myself and most importantly some crucial life lessons. It has also sharpened my focus

Around a year ago I sweated my way through a brown belt kick boxing exam. Since then I have taken a slight break as I moved temporarily for 12 months, but as I get closer to moving back to London, I’ve already started thinking about what martial art I would like to take up next. Aikido? Taekwondo? Perhaps karate (after all, maybe I will be naturally good at this one as I am half Japanese, where it originated).

I have been doing various martial arts for quite some time now, before I started living in London… some have worked out better than others (I won gold at a Choi Kwong Do competition but I had to give up MMA because, put simply, my 5ft 3 frame couldn’t handle it and I nearly broke my nose during a head lock). But I have absolutely loved trying every single one and can’t wait to start again.

I started kick boxing because I am a secret bad-ass.

Ok, that is not true. I started kick boxing because I wanted a way to shape up, give my body a good cardio-kicking and find a fun way to de-stress.

At first, I spent my time sheepishly hanging around, doing my best not to give anyone bigger than me any eye contact so I didn’t have to partner them. But then I started getting a little more confident, and smiling at people awkwardly (revealing my pink mouth-guard) with a “do you want to partner me?” look but always hoping that they would go easy on me.

As time went on though, my confidence grew (and then dipped again) and then grew some more, and I started to get more and more out of the sessions… and I started to learn some life lessons from the gruelling sessions that weren’t just about how to avoid a black eye.

Advertising

Here are my 7 seriously important life lessons that kick boxing has taught me. Because it hasn’t been all sweat and muscle ache for the sake of exercise…

Life lesson 1: Push yourself out of your comfort zone

The reason why it is called the comfort zone is because it is comfortable, not because it is exciting or exhilarating. A familiar place, perhaps bringing a warm feeling, you know you are safe in your comfort zone. But since when has safety equated to fun?

The trouble is that you’ll never progress if you keep sitting on the comfort zone sofa of life. Even worse, just because it is ‘familiar’ doesn’t mean it is necessarily good for you.

The only way to truly progress and develop yourself is to push your boundaries. The funny thing though, is the more you push, the more you experience and so your comfort zone widens. You’ll find that you quickly get used to whatever you used to find unnerving. There is nothing more comfort zone pushing then putting on a pair of gloves and getting into the boxing ring.

Life lesson 2: Learn from people better than you

Whether you are top of your game or just starting out, we can all learn from others, especially those that are better than us or do things differently. When I first started sparring, I was terrified and did my best to always partner my friend Kris in the hope that we wouldn’t have to pair a black belt or a bloke twice our size.

Our instructors quickly latched on to this though and like naughty school children, started separating us from each other. Whilst terrified at first, I soon started to learn new techniques and people were generous in the knowledge they shared about how to be a better fighter. This is also something I have learnt outside of kick boxing – people are generally very giving when it comes to helping you. The trouble is, most of us never ask or put ourselves in opportunities where we can learn.

Life lesson 3: Speak up if you are not happy

When you are sparring, it is inevitable that you are going to get punched in the face a few times, even if like me, you did your best to hide rather than box. Whilst most kick boxers will offer you a soft ‘tap’ there were also the odd imbeciles that wanted to show off or make themselves better and turn a friendly spar into an opportunity to use you as a human punch bag.

Advertising

Do you have to stand there and take it?  Of course not!

In the beginning, if I experienced one of these hard-hitting imbeciles, I would just simply remember not to partner them in the future and avoid them at all costs. Sensible approach in my mind. But then one day, the class was so small, the 6 of us rotated around and around and there was no escaping anyone. And that’s when I had no other choice but to speak up, a rather pathetic “erm… can you… errr…. not hit me as hard?… please?”

When the reply was “oh yea sure, I am so sorry, I didn’t realise”, I realised my error – they weren’t imbeciles. I had been the idiot for not speaking up! If you don’t like something, either change it or ask for it to be changed.

Knowing this as boosted my confidence in the simple act of asking and speaking up about something if you are not happy. You don’t have to stand there, physically or metaphorically, while you’re being punched in the face.

Life lesson 4: Relax

When kick boxing, I am constantly being reminded to relax by my instructors when punching and sparring because the more relaxed your body is, the more flexible you become, which in turn makes your technique better.

On one particular grading, I was so tired thanks to a late-night birthday (the kind of party where it is “oh just one more drink”), I was too tired to even think about being worried or scared for the exam. I just got up and went to the dojo. Result? My body relaxed, my mind wasn’t worried about what to expect and I did the best sparring I have ever done, which managed to get me a (rarely given) first grade!

This is true for life too!

Advertising

Relax a little, don’t be so rigid and stop your mind from worrying about the “what ifs”. You’ll find that things become a lot easier and are a lot more enjoyable.

Life lesson 5: Practice makes perfect

This is a classic, but I am afraid it is true. Practice really does make perfect. And you know what else? If you first don’t succeed, try and try again! It is boring but so truthful in life too. We can’t all be naturally gifted in everything that we do but there is no reason why we can’t dedicate a little time and effort to learn and practice. A learning curve for me was also seeing practice as enjoyable, fun and something I wanted to do (rather than ‘have’ to do). If you see it as a chore, you’ll resent having to practice to become perfect.

Life lesson 6: Be observant

Am I the best fighter in my class? Damn right! I am not! But have I won matches and passed demanding exams? Most certainly!

So how can you win a fight if you’re not at the top of the game? Wishing that your partner is having an off day can only get you so far!

My advice, be observant.

Watch others. Even if you don’t learn through someone else’s superior experience, you can always learn through your own simple observation. Even when I was partnering people my level or lower, I would still learn from each and every one of them, simply observing how they did things differently to me.

There was a guy in my class on a Tuesday that had a bad habit of starting to let his guard down half way through the match when he started to tire. The perfect time for me to land a jab. And there was a tall teenager who use to have his guard far too high up for me (because I was about his waist height) so would leave his torso exposed to me for a hook. And whilst my arm reach might mean I’ll never be able to jab my way to winning with anyone tall, my natural flexibility meant I could always plant a round-house kick to their chest or head. I may not have been the best, but observing other’s weaknesses meant I could see exactly where to shoot my arrow to find their Achille’s heel.

Advertising

Don’t underestimate the power of observation, be aware of your surroundings and look for opportunities to make your move.

Life lesson 7: Improvement isn’t linear

The trouble with improvement and development is that we seem to think that it is a linear progression. That every hour of practice we put in, the better we automatically become.

This is a misconception. Success isn’t a straight line, but instead a wandering, wavy road up and down a mountain’s path. Sometimes it can even feel like two steps forward and one step back! Not every day is the same situation so you can’t expect your progress to be linear.

Sometimes when kick boxing I feel elated that I have finally mastered that double backwards kick… only for me to feel so disappointed the next lesson when it isn’t as good. But there could be a whole host of reasons for this – perhaps I am particularly tired that day or my muscles aren’t as warm or flexible, or perhaps I haven’t eaten the right foods the day before for optimum energy. The situation is different.

Progress isn’t linear. Realising this through kick boxing has made me a lot kinder to my development in other areas too, like my career or learning Japanese. As long as you are committed to trying and learning, then you’re on the right road to success, however up and down it might be.

More by this author

Alice Dartnell

Engagement Expert

7 Ridiculously Simple Ways To Gain More Time In Your Busy Day! 7 Important Life Lessons Kick Boxing Has Taught Me 9 Amazing Uses for Coconut Oil You Never Knew Your Life Will Be Much Better If You Can Do These 10 Things How To Manage Anxiety (With No Suggestions Of Medication And Meditation!)

Trending in Lifestyle

1 18 Benefits of Journaling That Will Change Your Life 2 10 Easy At-Home Leg Toning Workouts for Women 3 10 Best Wireless Headphones For Running 4 How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind 5 7 Ways to Motivate Yourself to Workout

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on July 8, 2020

18 Benefits of Journaling That Will Change Your Life

18 Benefits of Journaling That Will Change Your Life

The act of writing in a journal often seems daunting or unnecessary to many people. Even authors who work on novels might shun the idea of daily diaries. What purpose does jotting down words on a regular basis do if not contributing to the next novel, play or song? I know from experience many benefits of journaling that I wish to share.

1. Understand Yourself Better

Though many people and even writers avoid keeping journals, I vow to do it more often. Not only do I desire to take up daily journaling but also I plan to do it with pen to paper.

Some of the benefits I’ve found from my more active days include finding myself in the sense of understanding what matters to me and what I want out of life. I’ve been incredibly fortunate to find a spouse who is my best friend and advocate in raising children. I attribute this and much more to what I learned about myself in keeping journals for years.

2. Keep Track of Small Changes

I’ll admit that I never got very far with my guitar lessons, but in writing in a journal, I have seen the ability to track small changes like those that come when you practice anything.

Those learning a musical instrument often fail to see the small improvements that come with regular practice. Writing won’t help you switch chords any faster, but it will help you to develop a better sense for language and grammar just by doing it.

3. Become Aware of What Matters

As you continue to write in a journal, following a stream-of-consciousness feel, you can look back on the topics that you chose to write about. Those issues and emotions that poured out of you will provide insight on to what matters most to you.

You may not even realize that you’re job is depressing you or that you want to spend more time with your kids until you look over your thoughts that you weren’t really thinking about.

Advertising

4. Boost Creativity

The idea that the brain and its neural activity across hemispheres encourages learning also shows up in increased creativity. Just like with learning an instrument, your increased activity will inspire your thoughts to connect and reconnect in different ways.

When I wrote in a journal, I often wrote poetry as well as just my thoughts as they came out. I started to hear poems more in my mind; so much so that I took to scrawling lines on napkins and finding metaphors in mundane activities.

You really are what you do, so writing helps grow more than being a writer. Writing boosts the way you communicate and structure language, which really is a creative process.

5. Represents Your Emotions in a Safe Environment

A journal is as private as it gets. You can lock it in a safe or tuck it under a pillow and no one will accidentally share it on social media or have an opportunity to “leave a comment.”

Write about your sorrow as much as your happiness and frustration and know that you don’t have to keep your emotions inside your body. You can put them on paper.

6. Process Life Experiences

When you take the time to look back over what you’ve written, be it a week or a year later, you will have the distance you need to more objectively interpret your raw feelings.

Everything from losing a job to losing a loved one can emerge in a new light for a fresh perspective. Figuring out how the benefits of journaling affect your perspective on life will create connection and increase creativity.

Advertising

7. Stress Relief

In combining the exercise inherent in fine motor coordination that comes from the act of writing with the emotional release of self expression, those who maintain a journal relieve stress.

Try it out. Go home and write about your day. Write about the traffic. Write about the coffee order the barista got wrong but you didn’t have time to change. See how you can physically purge some of that pent-up stress by putting it on paper.

8. Provide Direction

Though journaling is often conducted as an activity without much direction, it often provides direction.

One of the biggest benefits of journaling is that your chaotic thoughts merge to show a direction in which to head. Asking the right questions is the only way to achieve the best solutions, so look to your journal to find your way toward your next goal.

9. Solve Problems

Just as in practicing math problems, we all get better at finding hidden solutions through the act of processing.

Think of your next goal as X and solve your life problems by reading your journals as word problems. The benefit of journaling here is that you write, explore and process to recognize and then solve problems.

When life is too in-your-face, you have to step back to see reality. Living in the moment allows us to write in the moment and use that expression to solve problems.

Advertising

10. Find Relief From Fighting

Solving your problems only comes after time to process, recognize and strategize. Just as in the benefit of journaling where relief comes from the act of writing, relief from fighting comes when you decide to “sit this one out” and communicate one-way.

Fighting is only productive when the fighters care to communicate and find common ground. When the emotions are as high as the stress levels, writing will function as the best time out.

11. Find Meaning in Life

Journaling will show you why you are living, whether you are wallowing in things you wish to change or striving to make the changes. Your life will begin to take on new meaning and your own words will reveal the actions that got you where you are so that you can assess and pave a new path for your future.

12. Allow Yourself to Focus

Taking even a small amount of time out of every day will provide you with not only peace of mind but also increased focus. Taking a break to meditate in writing and journaling will sharpen your mental faculties.

13. Sharpen Your Spirituality

When we write, we allow all the energy and experiences to flow through us, which often provides further insight into our own spirituality. Even if your parents didn’t raise you to follow a specific religion, your thoughts will start to show you what you believe about the universe and your place in it.

14. Let the Past Go

I’ve mentioned a few examples where going back over your writing offers advice and direction, but the simply truth is that writing down our feelings can be the best way to let them go. We can choose to literally throw these pages away when they’re filled with negativity and hate.

15. Allow Freedom

Journaling is the perfect way to not only express yourself but to also experience the freedom of being who you are. Your books can stay private or you can publish them. Your freedom stems from your sense of self and your perception of your thoughts.

Advertising

16. Enhance Your Career

Again, the private act of pen-to-paper processing provides the benefits of journaling mentioned above, but you can also enhance your career when you take similar ideas and categorize, edit and publish them in an online blog.

Your thoughts will often be personal and express emotions, but another benefit of journaling is uncovering fresh ideas about your work.

17. Literally Explore Your Dreams

All the benefits I’ve mentioned explore ideas, thoughts and emotions, which is also what our dreams and nightmares do. Through writing down your dreams from the previous night, you can enhance your creativity as well as connect some of the metaphorical dots from the rest of your journal.

18. Catalog Your Life for Others

No one wants to think about dying, but we all die. Leaving a journal will act as a way to reconnect with family and friends left behind. The ideas you wish to keep personal while you process the life you’re living will serve to rekindle and inspire those who loved you through the process.

We consider our partners our life witnesses, but writing provides a tangible mark on the world.

Now that you’ve learned all the benefits of journaling, it’s time to start writing a journal:

Featured photo credit: Kelly Sikkema via unsplash.com

Read Next