Advertising
Advertising

Tips for When Your Bachelor Party Shenanigans go Too Far

Tips for When Your Bachelor Party Shenanigans go Too Far

Bachelor parties are a last hoorah and an “anything goes” excuse for men to act like young boys again. Things often go way too far, and it’s fine unless you get caught up in the shenanigans. Angry spouses, agitated police officers, and black eyes are some standard outcomes. While your shenanigans may make you a legend among your buddies, they can be taken out of context by everyone not involved in your bachelor party. What may be intended as some innocent bonding time can be misconstrued. To avoid any backlash, there are ways to minimize the damage to your fellow comrades and yourself.

5 Examples of Bachelor Party Shenanigans That Went Too Far

1. The Disorderly Conduct Misdemeanor of the Staal Boys

During Eric Staal’s bachelor party, he and 14 others, including his brother, Jordan Staal, wound up getting arrested. Jordan and Eric play for the NHL team the Pittsburgh Penguins, so their arrest made headlines. They were screaming, yelling, and playing loud music at a resort and were warned multiple times to quiet down. They were ordered to leave the resort they were staying at, so they went on a walk, which lead them to the highway. There, they began to harass motorists, which led to their arrest. Jordan Staal, who was only 18 at the time, was charged with underage drinking.

Advertising

2. Moroccan Dress-Up Misunderstanding

In Morocco, a French man dressed up as a woman and paraded around in Marrakesh’s famous bazaar. This might not be a criminal offense in most places, but it’s seriously offensive in some. They were put in custody, and their actions were said to be irresponsible and disruptive to public morals. Morocco’s penal code outlaws homosexuality, and I guess dressing up as a woman as a prank crosses that legal line. Moral of the story here, I guess, is make sure you know what the customs are in the country you’re traveling to for your bachelor party shenanigans.

3. Mile High Bachelor Shenanigans

If you’re flying elsewhere for a bachelor party, you may not want to follow the lead of this crew. Twelve Brits were flying from London to Bratislava for Joshua Mariner’s bachelor party. They were loud and obnoxious, even throwing punches at each other. The crew stopped giving them alcohol. The end result was the captain landing the plane in Berlin, an unscheduled stop. The worst six of the bunch faced charges of up to 20,000 GBP under the Aviation Security Act. The saving grace in this story is that Ryanair should have never let them on the flight in their already drunken conditions. This is the kind of thing that has the potential to stand up in court when presented properly.

Advertising

4. Bachelor Party Bar Brawl

In Spokane, Washington, a groom-to-be hadn’t even made it to the altar before he made his first appearance in court for a bachelor party gone wrong. He and two of his friends were a part of an all-out brawl during their party. Multiple calls occurred stating that a man was jumping up and down on the hood of a car. When the police arrived, they found more than 25 people fighting outside of the bar. When police tried to separate the groom and his two buddies, they pushed the officer. Police backup was called and more than 25 officers arrived to break up the madness. The three have been charged with assaulting a law enforcement officer as well as other misdemeanors.

5. The Groping Groom

Police arrested a groom to be in Stillwater named Steven Bryce Meduna after allegedly groping women on the dance floor at a bar. Meduna was asked to leave but he resisted. In his drunken stupor, he grabbed a railing and refused to let go when they attempted to drag him off the dance floor. Several employees finally managed to get him onto the patio area but he continued to aggressively attempt to punch a security officer. Meduna was arrested for disorderly conduct and was booked into Washington County Jail.

Advertising

Stealing Someone’s Garden Gnome

It may seem hilarious at the time to steal someone’s property like, say, a garden gnome. However, the owners may not take it so well, and they may call the police. If you’re found with said garden decoration, you may end up in more trouble than you bargained for. As you didn’t cause bodily harm or threaten anyone, the charge will be theft. Theft is a felony in most cases, and it’s possible you could be sent to prison for 3 months to 2 years. Most people are going to understand that you made an error in judgement at a bachelor party. First, plead forgiveness from the owners with a formal apology. If you are unable to sweet talk the police and owners into the innocence of your theft, you’re likely going to need a defense lawyer.

Criminal Mischief

Criminal mischief includes silly things you would never normally do. Anything goes at a bachelor party while you are out on the town for the night. Maybe in your half drunk lack of judgement, you kick someone’s property or maybe you want to commemorate the night with a graffiti memorial. That’s all well and good until the police drive by and catch you mid-spray (or mid-kick). It depends how much damage you’ve done in dollars, of course, but you could end up with jail time for your momentary lapse. Don’t run. This will only incur additional charges. Drop the can, raise your hands and be prepared to answer some questions. It’s likely you’ll be taken down to the police station as you’ve already proven you can’t be trusted on this particular night. Be cooperative but don’t give up too much information as it can be used against you later. You may be charged, and if this occurs, immediately ask for a plea deal and say you will fix the damage you caused. This should eliminate any possibility of a criminal record.

Advertising

Indecent Exposure

While it may seem innocent to urinate in the streets or go streaking during a bachelor party, it can be taken up in the wrong way completely. You could end up in prison or fined a lot of money with an indecent exposure conviction if you don’t get your story across correctly. It’s probably best if you skip right to finding a lawyer so they can argue your case for you. It’s possible that your charges can be reduced or dismissed if defense strategies are played out well.

Disorderly Conduct

Just the act of swearing in the streets (which may be perfectly acceptable according to bachelor party etiquette) can land you in jail for the night. By law, you’re breaching peace, and you can be considered a threat to the public. If you’re convicted under the charge of disorderly conduct, it’s a permanent stain on your record. If you’re charged with a class B misdemeanor, you could face prison time. You may be asked to provide a statement by the police, but if you’re under the influence, you may want to keep quiet. Many times, drunken ramblings only make things worse.

Drinking in Public

There may be drinking in public involved with your bachelor party, or you may just be drunk getting from one place to the next. Being arrested for public intoxication is a buzzkill to the whole night. While you’re drunk, the police may decide to release you from prison, provided you plead guilty or no contest. While you may want to get back out and party with your friends, you’ll actually be convicted if you agree to their terms. It’s publicly put on record, and it can influence your career later on. Even if you’re guilty, this small act shouldn’t change your life. If the police press charges, get a defense lawyer and contest it.

Evading Arrest (i.e. running from the cops)

Evading arrest is a fine line and you have more rights than you may realize. If a police officer starts talking to you, you’re not required to respond. You are free to decline questions or searches as long as you haven’t been placed in custody or formerly arrested. If they have reasonable suspicion, they must order you to stop. If they do ask you to stop and you don’t, you could end up with high fines and potentially some jail time. The best way to avoid the charge is to say you were confused, and if they didn’t take the necessary steps towards a proper arrest, you can contest it.

More by this author

Loraine Couturier

Content creation and marketing

How To Mend A Broken Heart After A Heart-breaking Goodbye Insecurities Are Hidden Wounds That Take Time to Heal in Any Relationships 7 Things “I Love You” Doesn’t Mean 7 Ways to Thrive Now By Fixing Mistakes From The Past 5 Non-Surgical Ways to Look Younger at 40

Trending in Brain

1 How Cognitive Learning Benefits Your Brain 2 How to Improve Your Brain Memory Naturally: Foods to Eat And Skip 3 Do Memory Supplements Work? 10 Supplements to Boost Brain Power 4 How to Improve Your Memory: 7 Natural (And Highly Effective) Ways 5 10 Best Brain Power Supplements That Will Supercharge Your Mind

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on September 3, 2019

How Cognitive Learning Benefits Your Brain

How Cognitive Learning Benefits Your Brain

What is knowledge? Does it have structure? And how do we acquire it?

When seeking answers to questions like this, we must turn to the appropriate field of study. Here, we must turn to the branch of philosophy known as epistemology.

Epistemology is defined as the study of the nature and scope of knowledge and justified belief.[1] Epistemology deals with the production of knowledge.

But what exactly brings about the production of knowledge? And what can we do to trigger cognitive learning to improve our knowledge leading to changes in our brain?

The simple answer is that we must learn to think. But we can’t stop there. We must learn to think about our thinking. That’s when cognitive learning comes into place.

Cognition (thinking) is the mental action or process of acquiring knowledge and understanding through thought, experience, and the senses.

Metacognition (thinking about thinking) is awareness and understanding of one’s own thought processes.

Constructing Knowledge

In order to bring forth knowledge, we must learn to think. If we follow the advice of Derek and Laura Cabrera, we find that Information X Thinking = Knowledge.

So, how do we construct knowledge? Let’s examine an analogy for knowledge construction offered by Steve Stockdale in Here’s Something About General Semantics: A Primer for Making Sense of Your World.[2] Stockdale compares the “Building Block” Analogy vs. the “Spiral” Analogy in knowledge construction:

    Building Blocks Analogy

    Stockdale posits,

    “Typically, we grow up with a view of learning using the building blocks analogy.”

    Here, we do the following:

    • We see things segregated and compartmentalized.
    • We learn our alphabet as a block of stacked letters.
    • We learn our numbers as a block of numbers.
    • We learn to spell by visualizing blocks of letters.

    Spiral Analogy

    Stockdale argues,

    “However, if we apply what we ‘know’ about what goes on around us, we can choose to use a more appropriate analogy: we tend to learn in more of a spiral pattern than simple building blocks.”

    Stockdale describes the spiral nature of learning as follows:

    • Just as the spiral expands from the center, our learning is continual and never-ending.
    • As we learn about one thing, we enable ourselves to learn more about something else, from a different perspective.
    • What we learn relates to what we’ve already learned, and what we’ve yet to learn, just as the spiral connects, or relates, one region to another.
    • The spiral more appropriately implies the continually-changing and more complex nature of ourselves and the world around us.

    Moreover, to further answer this question, and to deepen our understanding of the topic, we will examine the philosophy known as General Semantics. From there, we will learn how to eliminate confusion and barriers to learning.

    You might not agree with the philosophical beliefs of some of the philosophers, for which I am not asking you to become a follower of, but I am asking you to keep an open mind regarding the ideas discussed here (the ideas, not the person)

    As you learn more about the philosophy, pay attention to how your level of understanding deepens and expands. Your level of understanding on any topic progresses from an intuitive understanding, to a systematic level, then to a scholarly level of understanding.

    Advertising

    In The Logical Structure of Objectivism (“Beta” Version) by William Thomas and David Kelley, we are provided with the following example of Levels of Understanding:[3]

    1. Intuitive – non-reflexive acceptance of a principle, based on the subconscious integration of a mass of accumulated information and experience.
      Example: Physics – common-sense experiences of gravity.
    2. Systematic – ability to formulate principles explicitly and relate them logically to other principles and data.
      Example: Ability to state the law of gravity and its relation to other laws.
    3. Scholarly – issues pertaining to the formulation and validation of the principles.
      Example: Physicist’s knowledge of gravitational theory.

    As you read, I encourage you to think about your level of understanding as you learn more about a concept. You will find that as you learn more, you will increase both your breadth and depth on any concept.

    Learning the Whole Picture

    “A person does what he does because he sees the world as he sees it.” – Alfred Korzybiski

    When an event happens, what portions of reality do we select to attend to and what portions do we leave out? Is it possible that we might miss certain things by simply attempting to label and explain them?

    The answer is yes and General Semantics was developed to help us answer this question.

    Alfred Korzybiski developed the theory of time-binding, which later evolved into General Semantics as scientific orientation toward language behavior. Bruce and Susan Kodish define it as a,

    “General theory of evaluation. One that is concerned with understanding how we evaluate, with the non-verbal, inner life of each individual, with how each of us experiences and makes sense of our experiences, including how we use language and how language ‘uses’ us.”

    In Here’s Something About General Semantics: A Primer for Making Sense of Your World, Steve Stockdale defines it as,

    “General Semantics deals with the process of how we perceive, construct, evaluate, and respond to our life experiences. Our language-behaviors represent one aspect of these responses.”

    General Semantics is a self-improvement program created by Korzybski in the 1920s that sought to understand and regulate human mental models and behaviors. It was officially launched as General Semantics in 1933 after Korzybski published Science and Sanity: An Introduction to Non-Aristotelian Systems and General Semantics.

    To understand General Semantics at a deeper level, we need to possess an understanding of the map-territory analogy and the abstraction process.

    The Map is Not the Territory

    Mary P. Lahman provides the following premises for General Semantics in Awareness and Action: A General Semantics Approach to Effective Language Behavior:[4]

    1. The map is not the “territory,” so there is no not territory.
    2. A map covers not all the territory, so any map is only part of the territory.
    3. Maps refer to parts of the territory becoming reflexive to other parts at different levels of abstraction.

      To understand this map-territory analogy, let’s first examine how the words “map” and “territory” are being used.

      • Map = Language
      • Territory = Reality

      Korzybski proposed a map-territory analogy to encourage exploration of verbal maps (language or words), noting that they (maps) do not accurately describe what is happening in the territory (reality). Korzybski found that when the territory (reality) changes, we must update our maps (language).

      Stockdale argues that,

      “Just as a well-drawn map depicts, represents, illustrates, symbolizes, etc., an actual geographic area, so should our language properly reflect that which it refers to – that which is NOT language. However, we often confuse the words we use with those ‘things’ the words refer to. We confuse the word with the thing; we mistake the map as the territory.”

      Process of Abstraction

      Let’s try a quick thought experiment to demonstrate this point. In Awareness and Action: A General Semantics Approach to Effective Language Behavior, Mary P. Lahman asks us to do the following:

      • Close your eyes to help you experience a world without words.
      • What are you doing right now? As you hear these words let yourself become aware of how you are sitting or lying down or standing.
      • How can you allow yourself to feel the support of what holds you up?
      • Where do you feel unnecessary tensions? Do you feel tension in your jaw? In your face?
      • Where do you feel ease? How clearly do you feel yourself breathing?

      Lahman states that, “Many events are occurring inside and outside your skin right now.” She asks, “Can you allow yourself non-verbally to experience these activities?” She found, along with practitioners of General Semantics, that the answer is no. By attempting to label and explain things, we simply leave out information.

      Advertising

      Alfred Korzybski found that we leave out information through the process of abstracting. He developed a model called the Structural Differential as a means to visualize this process. Let’s briefly examine this model.

      Abstracting or the process of abstraction is typically defined as the process of concept formation and the recognition of common features. In philosophy, you typically find abstraction and concretization, where we classify a concept by distinct categories and referents.

      For example, you could classify living organisms and then further breakdown the concept to rational thinking and non-rational thinking to differentiate a human from an animal. If you were to classify dogs, you could use referents to make an even more concrete distinction by listing different types of dogs, or different colors of dogs, etc.

        Korzybski took a slightly different approach to abstracting with his creation of General Semantics and the Structural Differential. According to experts at ThisIsNotThat.com, Korzybski originally developed this as a three-dimensional (free-standing) model, where you imagine a colander (or a strainer) in place of the ragged parabola in the actual model.

        They posit in Explaining the Structural Differential, that we move from an event (something happens), to object (I partially sense what happens), to description (I describe what I sense), to inference (I make meanings, inferences, beliefs, theories, etc.).[5]

        Turning Imagination into Reality

        “We don’t get meaning, we respond with meaning.” – Charles Sanders Peirce

        Let’s examine a practical example of the abstraction process and the Structural Differential. An idea took root in the back of my mind after watching a TED Talk – Turning children’s imagination into reality. Artist and designer Dominic Wilcox explained his mission: to inspire the world’s children to become the creative thinkers of our future by connecting their amazing ideas with skilled makers.

        Here’s the TED Talk video:

        Children are the most creative people in the world. They possess the unique ability to think to the furthest reaches of their imagination. Whereas adults have a barrier to creativity, children do not.

        I followed Dominic’s advice and asked,

        “What if I take my daughter’s wild imagination seriously?”

        This question brought about something truly creative and imaginative.

        One day, while I was working in my basement, my four-year-old daughter, Ella Schwandt, created a story on my whiteboard. With Dominic’s idea firmly planted in the back of my mind, I asked my daughter to explain her story to me.

        A couple weeks went by. My daughter was outside playing with chalk on our driveway. I asked her to recall the story she drew on my whiteboard. I then drew six boxes in the form of a storyboard and had her go through the story again, yet this time we simplified it.

        This ultimately led to a self-published children’s book authored by my daughter – Ella Katherine Schwandt. I identified myself as the translator and my wife, Tomi Schwandt, as the editor. We were able to bring my daughter’s vivid imagination into reality. And this is the book published on July 15, 2019: Charlotte Emmy & The Rainbow Dimension: A book by a four-year-old girl!

        What was fascinating to witness was watching my daughter go through the process of abstraction, where she was able to describe her ideas from something extremely abstract to something more concrete. Essentially, she was able to place her wild imagination into this world. And she’s four!

        Recall the discussion of the Structural Differential. The closer to the top (event level – shape of a parabola) the more abstract, where the closer to the bottom, ideas and concepts become more concrete.

        For example, my daughter held abstract ideas in her head about rainbows and different characters. By drawing the images, she took those ideas (not all) and abstracted them. She then described the images and applied meaning to them.

        Advertising

          Lahman found that,

          “Language shapes the questions that we ask, which then affects what we observe, and, consequently, how we report findings.”

          Thus, my daughter’s map, or her view of reality, is not true reality. It’s a mental model (a continuously evolving mental model) overlaid over the territory (reality). Whereas, as a child, my mental model would have overlaid the same territory, but my map would have been completely different.

          Let’s take a loot at how my daughter moved through the process of abstraction to create her story:

            1. Event (Reality): My daughter starts to form ideas based on her map (language) of the territory (reality).
            2. Object (Senses): She starts connecting dots (or strings); however, it is impossible to connect everything, so certain things were left out. She was able to use her senses to start capturing some of the ideas.
            3. Description (Verbal Awareness): She verbally describes her story for the first time. This is the difficult part. Imagine you are asked to close your eyes and describe what is going through your mind at that moment. It is difficult and things will get left out. However, this is where my daughter described her abstract characters and creations, such as Charlotte Emmy, a ham-et (vehicle for riding rainbows) and Hanny P’Tanny (location within the Rainbow Dimension).
            4. Infer (Generate Meaning): She started to generate meaning for each creation after describing them. For example, the character, Charlotte Emmy, is on a journey to find her fifth birthday present (my daughter loves her birthday!) Along the journey, she finds a fat and soft house where you are both inside and outside at the same time. She then explains that her birthday present is inside a box, which is also inside a cloud. Inside the box is her thoughts, emotions, and feelings. She even described her thoughts, emotions, and feelings.

            Using Science as a Method

            “Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.” – Wendell Johnson

            One of the more controversial figures in recent times, L. Ron Hubbard, founder of Dianetics and Scientology, was familiar with Korzybiski’s work. In Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood, and the Prison of Belief, Lawrence Wright discussed how Hubbard used Korzybski’s work as he saw the need for creating a special vocabulary. Wright remarked,

            “Hubbard saw the need for creating a special vocabulary, which would allow him to define old thoughts in new ways (the soul becomes a thetan, for instance).”

            Another example of this is Hubbard’s creation of a clear, which is defined in Scientology as the name or a state achieved through auditing and describes a being who no longer has his or her own reactive mind. Or as Andrew O’Hehir remarked when comparing the smart drug movie Limitless to a clear, “It’s like Scientology in a pharmaceutical form.”

            Just to be clear (pun intended), I am not a Scientologist, nor am I asking you to become a believer in Scientology. However, I am asking you to keep an open mind as the following ideas for eliminating confusion and barriers to learning are extremely valuable.

            Confusion and Stable Datum

            “Confusion is the basic cause of stupidity.” – L. Ron Hubbard

            In Tools for the Workplace, based on the works of Hubbard, confusion is defined as any set of factors or circumstances which do not seem to have any immediate solution. It is more broadly defined as random motion.

            Furthermore, a datum can be defined as a piece of knowledge or something know (plural is data). Hubbard provides the following example,

            “If you were to stand in heavy traffic, you would be likely to feel confused by all the motion whizzing around you. If you were to stand in a heavy storm, with leaves and papers flying by, you would be likely to be confused.”

            Hubbard posited that we can understand confusion, but we must first understand its anatomy. He remarked,

            “a confusion is only a confusion so long as all particles are in motion. A confusion is only a confusion so long as no factor is clearly defined or understood.”

            Let’s examine one more example of the stable datum (it is not linked to Hubbard, nor Scientology). Chris McChesney, Sean Covey, and Jim Huling write about this idea using an air traffic controller as an example in The 4 Disciplines of Execution,

            “Right now more than a hundred airplanes might be approaching, taking off, or taxiing around, and all of them are very important, especially if you happen to be on one of them. But for the Air Traffic Controller, only one airplane is important right now – the one that’s landing at this moment. The Controller is aware of all the other planes on the radar. She is keeping track of them, but right now all her talent and expertise is solely focused on one flight. If she doesn’t get that flight on the ground safely and with total excellence, then nothing else she might achieve is really going to matter much.” 

            How to Apply the Idea of a Stable Datum

            Jim Westergren answers this in Theory on How to Become a Genius.[6] Westergren posits,

            “For a person to become more smart he has to recognize which data are of value for him. What is valuable for him also depends on what his purpose is. He has to develop a skill to see which data are important for him in the ocean of data that he is operating in.”

            Westergren provides an example, similar to the abstraction process mentioned earlier, where we can view data in four specific fields.

            • Field 1 – Vital Data. Data in the field of true philosophy. Covers such things as understanding of life and how it operates, reason for existence, Metaphysics, etc. In short – the greatest truths.
            • Field 2 – Valuable Data. Data concerning how to do things and which helps you in your life. Data which help you understand things and how it works.
            • Field 3 – Useless Data. Data that does not help you and has no value. Most data from TV, newspapers, school education and talking between people unfortunately falls under this field.
            • Field 4 – Destructive Data. False data, data which makes you unhappy, data intended to bring about destruction. Unfortunately more than you believe.

            Overcoming Barriers to Learning

            “Trying to live in a high-speed world with low-speed people is not very safe.” – L. Ron Hubbard

            Based on the works of Hubbard, in The Technology of Study, we are provided with three barriers to learning. Here are my interpretation of the three, along with an example and practical application.

            1. Absence of Mass: Theory + Application = Practical Knowledge

            Example:

            Flying an airplane. If you were to study an airplane, you could read about it in textbooks. You could read how to operate it, learn about its controls, and read about how to fly an airplane. But you would have to actually fly an airplane to learn how to fly an airplane.

            Practical Application:

            Hubbard stated, “There is a rule which goes if you cannot demonstrate something in two dimensions, you have it wrong.” Outside of putting hands on the actual thing, sketch a two-dimensional representation of it and all its parts.

            2. Too Steep a Gradient: Process Knowledge

            Example:

            Learning to read. You can’t learn to read without first knowing the alphabet, then the formation of words, then the formation of sentences followed by paragraphs, etc. We must understand the process of a task prior to successfully completing a task.

            Practical Application:

            Do a process map of the task you are confused on. Then pinpoint where you became confused in the process. From there go back and relearn the previous steps.

            3. Misunderstood Word: Sense-Making (Meaning-Making)

            Example:

            We have all had the experience of reading a book only to finish the book without knowing what we have actually read. The confusion was our inability to grasp something after we came across a confusing word.

            Practical Application:

            Every time you read something (a book, magazine, blog, etc.) and you come across a word you don’t know or fully understand, take the time to look up the definition and application of the word. If you find yourself reading and you have no idea what you are reading, start over and pinpoint where the confusion began. Lookup that word, apply it in a different context, then go back to your reading.

            The Bottom Line

            Attaining cognitive learning benefits is like storing information on a computer’s hard drive (your brain). Then, improving the brain’s ability to provide quick access to the information stored on it. The hard drive stores the information, but to connect and speed up your processing power, you need to insert thinking. Thus, Information X Thinking = Knowledge.

            By understanding how you think and learn, you can improve your level of understanding on any concept. This includes an understanding of the abstraction process, the elimination of confusion and eliminating barriers to learning.

            Advertising

            Just as you should not use a map from 1940 to navigate across a country – you should not use a dated mental map to improve your learning capacity. You must possess a more accurate map of the territory to navigate successfully.

            Featured photo credit: J. Kelly Brito via unsplash.com

            Reference

            Read Next