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5 Reasons Why The Smarter You Are, The Harder It Is For You To Fall In Love

5 Reasons Why The Smarter You Are, The Harder It Is For You To Fall In Love

If you belong to a group of more intelligent people, your love life may be quite complicated. Finding love and keeping it may come surprisingly difficult to you. You may feel misunderstood in relationships and not quite sure what you do wrong. The answer, as surprising as it seems, may lie in your IQ.

Intelligent people seem like they have it all – they exceed at school, their careers are flourishing, their social lives are full of excitement, and their personalities can win over almost anyone. Yet, more often than not, they have difficulty in finding the right partner, falling in love and forming long-lasting relationships.

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If you are a highly intelligent person, chances are that your intellect is actually responsible for making your love life slightly more complicated than you would prefer it. Or, if your love interest is highly intelligent, you can now understand his or her unusual ways.

1. Intelligent people value independence

It may often seem harsh, but smart people value their independence more than anything else. As independent thinkers, they often transfer this quality to other areas of their life. It is not that they don’t feel the love and need for the significant other, but their need for freedom doesn’t stop once they are in a relationship. This creates tension with their partners especially once they move in together. Their partners simply need to understand and respect their personal time and space in order to form a strong and lasting relationship with them.

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2. They never rush into relationships

When smart people are single, it is usually because they have made a conscious decision to do so. Although they may seem disinterested to the possible love partners, it is sometimes beneficial for a person to be single for some time as they can get a chance to reflect on their past relationships, find mistakes, but also learn a lot about themselves and grow as a person. This trait makes them look distant and cold, but in fact, it helps them to never look needy and rush into relationships for the wrong reasons.

3. They can’t stop themselves from analyzing things

Highly intelligent people seem to have differently wired brains. They are most often over-thinkers and way too analytical which can be harmful for them as people won’t always wait for them to debate all pros and cons. Yet, in a lot of times, this quality saves them from falling too fast. Yes, love shouldn’t be rationalized, yet sometimes we get blindsided by emotions and suffer way more once we get to the rational part.

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4. They are cautious

Similarly to the previous trait, smart people find it hard to believe in the concept of love at first sight. Again, it is not because they lack the romantic gene, but simply because they can more vividly recall the pain from the past. Therefore, they tend to be more cautious. Although they may seem suspicious, it is just their defense mechanism against getting hurt.

5. Professionals before lovers

Smart people often seem to be more focused on their careers than their love life. This comes as no surprise, after everything mentioned before. Since they tend to be misunderstood a lot in relationships, their professions are their go-to place to feel good, appreciated and successful. Their careers are their comfort zone since it provides them with the opportunity to use their rational side and their analysis is put to good use at work. This is why they usually get married a bit later than their peers, which actually could work in their favor, since they can enter the marriage as fulfilled and successful.

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Featured photo credit: https://unsplash.com/ via images.unsplash.com

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Last Updated on December 10, 2019

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

Journal writing.

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Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

Consider this:

Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

Kickstart Journaling

How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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