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5 Reasons Why The Smarter You Are, The Harder It Is For You To Fall In Love

5 Reasons Why The Smarter You Are, The Harder It Is For You To Fall In Love

If you belong to a group of more intelligent people, your love life may be quite complicated. Finding love and keeping it may come surprisingly difficult to you. You may feel misunderstood in relationships and not quite sure what you do wrong. The answer, as surprising as it seems, may lie in your IQ.

Intelligent people seem like they have it all – they exceed at school, their careers are flourishing, their social lives are full of excitement, and their personalities can win over almost anyone. Yet, more often than not, they have difficulty in finding the right partner, falling in love and forming long-lasting relationships.

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If you are a highly intelligent person, chances are that your intellect is actually responsible for making your love life slightly more complicated than you would prefer it. Or, if your love interest is highly intelligent, you can now understand his or her unusual ways.

1. Intelligent people value independence

It may often seem harsh, but smart people value their independence more than anything else. As independent thinkers, they often transfer this quality to other areas of their life. It is not that they don’t feel the love and need for the significant other, but their need for freedom doesn’t stop once they are in a relationship. This creates tension with their partners especially once they move in together. Their partners simply need to understand and respect their personal time and space in order to form a strong and lasting relationship with them.

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2. They never rush into relationships

When smart people are single, it is usually because they have made a conscious decision to do so. Although they may seem disinterested to the possible love partners, it is sometimes beneficial for a person to be single for some time as they can get a chance to reflect on their past relationships, find mistakes, but also learn a lot about themselves and grow as a person. This trait makes them look distant and cold, but in fact, it helps them to never look needy and rush into relationships for the wrong reasons.

3. They can’t stop themselves from analyzing things

Highly intelligent people seem to have differently wired brains. They are most often over-thinkers and way too analytical which can be harmful for them as people won’t always wait for them to debate all pros and cons. Yet, in a lot of times, this quality saves them from falling too fast. Yes, love shouldn’t be rationalized, yet sometimes we get blindsided by emotions and suffer way more once we get to the rational part.

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4. They are cautious

Similarly to the previous trait, smart people find it hard to believe in the concept of love at first sight. Again, it is not because they lack the romantic gene, but simply because they can more vividly recall the pain from the past. Therefore, they tend to be more cautious. Although they may seem suspicious, it is just their defense mechanism against getting hurt.

5. Professionals before lovers

Smart people often seem to be more focused on their careers than their love life. This comes as no surprise, after everything mentioned before. Since they tend to be misunderstood a lot in relationships, their professions are their go-to place to feel good, appreciated and successful. Their careers are their comfort zone since it provides them with the opportunity to use their rational side and their analysis is put to good use at work. This is why they usually get married a bit later than their peers, which actually could work in their favor, since they can enter the marriage as fulfilled and successful.

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Last Updated on February 19, 2020

15 Positive Thinking Books You Need for a Happy Life

15 Positive Thinking Books You Need for a Happy Life

Books give us the opportunity to live vicariously through the lives of people with greater wisdom than ourselves. They stimulate our brains and help us not only solve the problems we struggle with, but also motivate and inspire us with new ideas.

One of the great things about people who think positively and live happy lives is that they love to help others do the same. There are countless positive-thinking books and these 15 are a great way to help you start living a happy life.

1. Man’s Search For Meaning by Victor E. Frankl

mans search for meaning

    This book goes through the horrific struggle of Viktor Frankl who survived holocaust concentration camps. The only thing that kept him going was his idea that everything, even the worst of human suffering, had to have meaning. If you’re struggling through anything in your life, I guarantee the words of Viktor will give you courage to press on and find happiness.

    2. Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

    tuesday with morrie

       

      What is life’s greatest lesson? Morrie, a retired professor with a fatal disease, opts to use his predicament to share that message as opposed to just giving up and dying. Following the last few months of Morrie’s life will help you realize what is truly important in life.

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      3. The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch

      Lecture_Book

        Similar to Tuesdays with Morrie, Randy is a college professor who finds he has a fatal disease with only a few months to live. It is customary for professors at his university (Carnegie Mellon) to give a final lecture with the basis of ‘what wisdom would you impart to a large group of people if it was your last chance?’ Randy stays incredibly positive throughout and even keeps the lecture humorous and entertaining. Amidst it all, his wisdom is a powerful reminder about how to live a happy, full life.

        4. Earning Freedom by Michael Santos

        earning freedom

          Michael Santos was sentenced to 45 years is prison for selling drugs. During his term he fought hard to earn a masters degree and half of a doctorate (halted by the warden) while writing numerous books educating students about the criminal justice system. This book provides a fascinating window into his entire sentence (released in 2012) and how a positive attitude and strong work ethic got him through it. If he found happiness in prison through positive thinking, we can do it anywhere.

          If you don’t have the attention span to finish a long book, the following quick reads are shorter but just as powerful.

          5. The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper

          little engine that could

            This book has shaped childrens’ minds for years. It illustrates the undeniable fact that when you think positively and believe in yourself, you can accomplish extraordinary things.

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            6. The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

            The_Giving_Tree

              Happiness is found in giving. What does it mean to love someone? What would you sacrifice for someone you love? This children’s book teaches a valuable lesson about unconditional love and what it truly means to be happy.

              7. The Dash by Linda Ellis and Mac Anderson

              the dash

                “When your life is over, everything you did will be represented by a single dash between two dates—what will that dash mean for the people you have known and loved?” (Linda Ellis) We don’t choose a lot of things about our life – parents, birthplace, etc. – but we can choose what that dash between those two dates means. This short book will give you a great perspective on making your life worthwhile.

                8. As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

                As-a-Man-Thinketh

                  “The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to be harmoniously related to his inner state… Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are.” (James Allen) This book might be short, but it is jam-packed with statements that will make you stop and think. We truly become what we think we are. Negative thoughts affect us more than we know. Positive thinking = happy life.

                  9. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald  Miller

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                  a-million-miles-in-a-thousand-years

                    You are the author of your story. No matter how boring or dull your life has been, you can always turn it around. Donald was in a rut in his life. He had no desire to get out of bed and found himself questioning the meaning of life. Eventually he realized he wasn’t a slave to a pre-written script. He used that mindset to turn around his thoughts, actions, and life. When the closing credits roll on the story of your life, what will people say? Never forget that you have the power to push your limits and live an interesting, happy life.

                    10. The Traveler’s Gift by Andy Andrews

                    travelersgift

                      The Traveler’s Gift is a fictional story about a man who is overwhelmed with life and finds himself thrown into numerous true events from history – including Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. He interacts and learns important life lessons from seven different experiences. The book is full of ways to think more positively and find more success in life.

                      11. David and Goliath by Malcolm Gladwell

                      david and goliath

                        Malcolm Gladwell motivates you to challenge your preconceptions of underdogs and misfits in this thought-provoking book. When you break down the facts in the story of David and Goliath from the Bible, you find that David really wasn’t an underdog at all – he was the one with the advantage. This book outlines story after story after story of people who were at a disadvantage and learned to find the strength in their weakness.

                        12. How Will You Measure Your Life by Clayton M. Christensen

                        how will you measure

                          How would you feel if you got to the end of your life only to realize you had been measuring success wrong? Clayton provides a mass amount of wisdom and advice on how to live a life you won’t regret.

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                          13. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff by Richard Carlson

                          Dont_Sweat_Small_Stuff

                            The small things we worry about every day may not seem like a big deal, but they wear us down slowly and stop us from living up to our full potential. Learn how to get rid of those worries and negative thoughts and live a happier life.

                            14. Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

                            mere christianity

                              C.S. Lewis, who used to be an Atheist, explains how he came to find meaning in life through Christianity. He breaks down all the reasons we doubt and falter in life and how living the principles of Christianity fixes our weaknesses. Lewis is famous for his deep, thought-provoking quotes and this book is no exception.

                              15. Bushido: The Way of the Samurai by Tsunetomo Yamamoto

                              bushido

                                Bushido is based on the Hagakure, a document that served as the basis for samurai warrior behavior. The document’s purpose was to shape the mind and the spirit of the samurai warrior.

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                                Featured photo credit: Annie Spratt via unsplash.com

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