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7 Ways for Successful Online Dating After 50

7 Ways for Successful Online Dating After 50

In the days past, people met Mr/Mrs right mostly in colleges, in a bar, through friends, family or even on the job. But today, we are witnessing a different phase. Increasingly, people are meeting on dating sites online .

Studies have shown that the fastest growing category of online dating services is the adult segment. As an older person looking for love and companionship, this can be a good option. But you need to practice caution.

Below are some effective ways for safe online dating;

1. You must be ready for the date

Before you can find a healthy relationship, you must be ready for a date. Don’t go in search of a date or involve in one if you are still getting over a past hurt or pains from a relation that never worked out.

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Before you can have a great dating adventure, you need to be open, feel positive and ready for the dating adventure. Never intend for a date to get over past relationship pains. You can never get the right date in this mood and state of mind. Worse still, you might end up with someone who only pities your status but does not genuinely love you.

2. Do your research

If you have made up your mind to try online dating as an option, please don’t just jump in and start having fun. Many negative issues have been reported about online dating sites.

Do your homework to research which dating site is best for you. There are dating sites “you pay to participate” while there are others “you freely participate”. You should know that fake identities can be easily created on free dating sites more easily than the other. You are safer where everyone uses a credit card and complete anonymity is never given a chance.

3. Involve your friends

Ensure to ask your friend’s opinion about your decision. Even during the process of signing up, they can help you meet potential dates by guiding you with your profile contents. What seems attractive to you might seem the opposite to them.

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They can help you choose a good profile picture, and fill up the data forms with positive information about yourself, like your hobbies and other interests. Let your friends have a review of your profile, before letting it go live.

4. Expand your options

When answering questions about what you are looking for on the dating site, please endeavor to elaborate your options. Some sites may ask what you do or don’t need in a date.

Giving too long answers may create chances of missing the most important ones, so just go straight to the most needed qualities or disqualifying ones and save the time.

Save the stress wanting to know if he has a master’s degree or owns a house. Whether he smokes, gambles or drinks, I think, should be more important. Guess you think that way too!

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5. Do away with platitude when setting up your profile

Common things people write about themselves may not portray your originality. This can be seen when you visit other people’s profiles and see what their hobbies are and what they like or don’t.

It’s ok to have common hobbies or experiences but ensure to display some originality or distinctive values. Whatever you write about yourself, ensure it portrays your choices and goals, and that it makes you distinct from others.

6. Be cautious and stay safe

Whether you meet someone or someone meets you, be cautious. At first, do try to talk on the mobile phone instead of using your home phone which can be traced to your home address.

Intending to meet face to face with a date? Please meet in a public place on a first date. An ideal place can be a coffee shop. Never let a date drive you anywhere or walk you to your vehicle in a secret or hidden place until you are confident he is what he says or know them better. It’s true that most people are well-meaning and genuine but this is not a risk you should take or you might end up with a very negative experience.

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7. Be patient

Online dating has this advantage of helping you meet people you could never have met otherwise. On the contrary, this could be a disadvantage too.

You are meeting people you really don’t know or what they have been all their life. What they tell you doesn’t make them genuine or honest. You don’t know anyone who can vouch for them.

Trusting people automatically have put many people in serious issues. This is the major reason why many people will speak ill of online dating. Even while meeting people face to face, it takes some time to know if people are really who they claim to be, so take your time. It doesn’t matter how sincere they claim to be.

You should be honest about what you want and expect that from date too. Some online daters are just out there to have fun, have a good time with no strings attached. Knowing what a date wants or what you want is a good guide to setting your boundaries.

Some people are so lucky to find the right person immediately when they sign up with an online dating site. This may not be everyone’s experience. It can take many dates to meet the right date for you and this is worth it at the end. You will definitely find that special person for you if you take your time and make the effort.

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Last Updated on December 10, 2019

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

5 Smart Reasons to Start Journal Writing Today

Here’s the truth: your effectiveness at life is not what it could be. You’re missing out.

Each day passes by and you have nothing to prove that it even happened. Did you achieve something? Go on a date? Have an emotional breakthrough? Who knows?

But what you do know is that you don’t want to make the same mistakes that you’ve made in the past.

Our lives are full of hidden gems of knowledge and insight, and the most recent events in our lives contain the most useful gems of all. Do you know why? It’s simple, those hidden lessons are the most up to date, meaning they have the largest impact on what we’re doing right now.

But the question is, how do you get those lessons? There’s a simple way to do it, and it doesn’t involve time machines:

Journal writing.

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Improved mental clarity, the ability to see our lives in the big picture, as well as serving as a piece of evidence cataloguing every success we’ve ever had; we are provided all of the above and more by doing some journal writing.

Journal writing is a useful and flexible tool to help shed light on achieving your goals.

Here’s 5 smart reasons why you should do journal writing:

1. Journals Help You Have a Better Connection with Your Values, Emotions, and Goals

By journaling about what you believe in, why you believe it, how you feel, and what your goals are, you understand your relationships with these things better. This is because you must sort through the mental clutter and provide details on why you do what you do and feel what you feel.

Consider this:

Perhaps you’ve spent the last year or so working at a job you don’t like. It would be easy to just suck it up and keep working with your head down, going on as if it’s supposed to be normal to not like your job. Nobody else is complaining, so why should you, right?

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But a little journal writing will set things straight for you. You don’t like your job. You feel like it’s robbing you of happiness and satisfaction, and you don’t see yourself better there in the future.

The other workers? Maybe they don’t know, maybe they don’t care. But you do, you know and care enough to do something about it. And you’re capable of fixing this problem because your journal writing allows you to finally be honest with yourself about it.

2. Journals Improve Mental Clarity and Help Improve Your Focus

If there’s one thing journal writing is good for, it’s clearing the mental clutter.

How does it work? Simply, whenever you have a problem and write about it in a journal, you transfer the problem from your head to the paper. This empties the mind, allowing allocation of precious resources to problem-solving rather than problem-storing.

Let’s say you’ve been juggling several tasks at work. You’ve got data entry, testing, e-mails, problems with the boss, and so on—enough to overwhelm you—but as you start journal writing, things become clearer and easier to understand: Data entry can actually wait till Thursday; Bill kindly offered earlier to do my testing; For e-mails, I can check them now; the boss is just upset because Becky called in sick, etc.

You become better able to focus and reason your tasks out, and this is an indispensable and useful skill to have.

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3. Journals Improve Insight and Understanding

As a positive consequence of improving your mental clarity, you become more open to insights you may have missed before. As you write your notes out, you’re essentially having a dialogue with yourself. This draws out insights that you would have missed otherwise; it’s almost as if two people are working together to better understand each other. This kind of insight is only available to the person who has taken the time to connect with and understand themselves in the form of writing.

Once you’ve gotten a few entries written down, new insights can be gleaned from reading over them. What themes do you see in your life? Do you keep switching goals halfway through? Are you constantly dating the same type of people who aren’t good for you? Have you slowly but surely pushed people out of your life for fear of being hurt?

All of these questions can be answered by simply self-reflecting, but you can only discover the answers if you’ve captured them in writing. These questions are going to be tough to answer without a journal of your actions and experiences.

4. Journals Track Your Overall Development

Life happens, and it can happen fast. Sometimes we don’t take the time to stop and look around at what’s happening to us at each moment. We don’t get to see the step-by-step progress that we’re making in our own lives. So what happens? One day it’s the future, and you have no idea how you’ve gotten there.

Journal writing allows you to see how you’ve changed over time, so you can see where you did things right, and you can see where you took a misstep and fell.

The great thing about journals is that you’ll know what that misstep was, and you can make sure it doesn’t happen again—all because you made sure to log it, allowing yourself to learn from your mistakes.

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5. Journals Facilitate Personal Growth

The best thing about journal writing is that no matter what you end up writing about, it’s hard to not grow from it. You can’t just look at a past entry in which you acted shamefully and say “that was dumb, anyway!” No, we say “I will never make a dumb choice like that again!”

It’s impossible not to grow when it comes to journal writing. That’s what makes journal writing such a powerful tool, whether it’s about achieving goals, becoming a better person, or just general personal-development. No matter what you use it for, you’ll eventually see yourself growing as a person.

Kickstart Journaling

How can journaling best be of use to you? To vent your emotions? To help achieve your goals? To help clear your mind? What do you think makes journaling such a useful life skill?

Know the answer? Then it’s about time you reap the benefits of journal writing and start putting pen to paper.

Here’s what you can do to start journaling:

Featured photo credit: Jealous Weekends via unsplash.com

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