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How To Travel in October

How To Travel in October

Travelling is a hobby for some and a leisure for others. It’s something that unwinds the mind from our everyday hustle and provides a cushion to our soul. We enjoy travelling and we often wish to go to places that haven’t been discovered and hop on planes to never be found again. We enjoy the soft touches of the foreign land, we bite into exotic food and normal cuisine; multiplies its taste in our taste buds. We enjoy meeting people and we enjoy being in the midst of amazing cultures. Sometimes we might just travel to the next county or district, however, that journey alone might put a smile on our faces as to what’s about to come to life.

A breath of fresh air they say, however, unlike summer, autumn can definitely be a challenge for anyone who’s looking forward to travel. There are several things one must take into consideration and I’ve managed the 4 most important detail one must pay attention to while traveling in October.

1. Choose The Right Gear

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travel gear

    Travelling in October requires preparation mentally and physically. You need to ensure that you’re equipped with the right gears according to your travel destination. In most parts of the world, October brings upon a turbulent weather people believe that it’s a symbol of a struggle before the grand festivities; in this case it would be Christmas.

    If you’re travelling in a cold country, make sure to always have a thick coat, boots, and enough winter gears with you. You might not know what the weather might turn into. Always ensure to have an umbrella or a raincoat to protect yourself from the rain. If you’re planning for an adventure which involves camping, make sure that your camping equipment is meant for the cold weathers and prepare yourself a winter sleeping bag. A summer sleeping bag will not be able to sustain you throughout the cold.

    On the contrary, if you’re headed to a warmer country make sure to find out the vaccines and medications needed for that particular country. Take on some loose clothes and summer gear that would allow you to enjoy the country. However, if you’re transitioning from a cold to a warmer country, be prepared for when you arrive again in your country by taking one set of clothes that helps manage the cold.

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    The right gear is important as it helps you cope as well as stay healthy during this season.

    2. Determine Your Travel Destination

    Travelling somewhere individually or in a group can be stressful, especially when choosing a particular destination. The destination would eventually set the tone for your whole trip. Are you planning for a relaxed trip or are you planning for an adventure? Are you planning for a warm travel or a cold cozy travel?

    This can all be based on your personality and your mood.

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    No one knows yourself better than you, so whilst deciding a destination, find yourself asking the questions on where your body adapts well to the temperature. If you’re a person who enjoys the warmth of summer, then you can take a trip to the Bahamas where during October, the weather is a bliss for a great swim. However, if you enjoy the cold autumn weather, then head to the Scandinavian part of Europe. You would not only find the cold weather enticing, but you will catch the whole country feasting on their traditional delicacy which is particularly famous for being a winter cuisine.

    3. Get Yourself to A Doctor Before The Trip

    The biggest mistake people do during these travels is that they forget making a small visit to the doctor. Many may find this unnecessary, however, this helps to narrow down your physical condition. If you’re an asthmatic or you’ve got high blood pressure, the countries you’re headed too might impact your health; meeting your doctor allows you to have an open mind towards your risks.

    If you’re travelling to countries where there’s a possibility to contract some form of disease or stomach flu, be sure to get a prescription from your doctor. This will help you avoid any unnecessary circumstances that might end up ruining your vacation. Some of the best advice is if you’re traveling in Asia, be sure to have a steel stomach. The depth of flavor and use of spices might be a surprise to your intestines if you aren’t used to it.

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    So always keep in mind to meet your doctor before going on your vacation.

    4. Always Be Prepared with A Plan B

    When planning a vacation, it’s definitely hard to think of a Plan B. You’re so fixated on the first plan and how you envision your vacation to be. You often picture how your vacation to be and what you’re entitled to. You picture the comforting weather, surrounded by new people and delicious food. However, sometimes you might need to have a Plan B to recuperate if your Plan A fails.

    During October, the weather is definitely volatile and unpredictable. If you’re planning to travel to another country or continent be sure to check the weather and the flight schedules, this is because sometimes flights might have been delayed or canceled due to the terrible weather. On the other hand, if you’re driving make sure your car is in great shape, but also keep together an emergency plan in case of any accidents.

    Keep with you a spare phone, torchlight, and an emergency set of numbers. This would help you in case something unthinkable happens.

    If you’re planning to travel in Autumn then make sure to be prepared, than being sorry. You’ll be guaranteed to have one of the best travel experiences one could have.

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    Published on April 7, 2021

    6 Signs Of A Controlling Person To Be Aware Of

    6 Signs Of A Controlling Person To Be Aware Of

    Some of the most manipulative people are so good at what they do that their words and actions can convince you into thinking they truly care about what’s best for you when in reality, it’s quite the opposite. The most common signs of a controlling person are rarely obvious to outside observers. And for someone enmeshed in a controlling relationship or friendship, it can be incredibly challenging to stay away from this toxic person, even if you’re aware of their emotionally abusive tendencies.

    While it’s ultimately up to you to decide whether to preserve or leave a lopsided, unfulfilling relationship, it’s nevertheless critical to understand the following six signs of controlling people so you can better advocate for yourself and mitigate the influence of their manipulative tendencies in your own life.

    1. They Push Their Own Personal Agenda

    Do you know someone who always tries to micromanage the words, behaviors, and attitudes of people around them? Does this person act like they have the right to know anything they want about you, including your location, what you’re doing in a given moment, who you’re talking to online, or any other private information about you? And when planning events and special occasions, does this person dominate conversations, steer plans in their own preferred directions, disparage others’ suggestions, and refuse to collaborate with anyone who might disagree with them?

    If you answered “yes” to some of the above questions, then those are clear signs of a controlling person whom you absolutely need to be cautious around. Controlling people are reluctant to even consider alternative ideas, let alone enthusiastically work with people who have differing views. They prefer to be the captain of every ship—regardless of how much or how little an issue personally impacts them—and they have an arsenal of manipulative tactics to deploy if someone stands in the way of them achieving their own personal agendas.

    In long-term relationships with controlling people, you may feel constantly pressured to meet their demands, follow their schedule, and focus on whatever they feel is most important. It’s not an exaggeration to say that these people act like the universe revolves around them, which can be exhausting to deal with for their family members, friends, and colleagues.

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    2. They Make Everything Transactional

    Controlling people aren’t always self-centered, but they’re not too empathetic either. Empathy for them tends to appear in the form of strategic concessions they use as a means to get what they want. They typically view interpersonal relationships as transactional opportunities to extract more value from people surrounding them, which can have a draining effect on those they interact with.

    For example, one sign of a controlling person may be their insistence on “keeping score.” This can involve doing nice things for you with the ulterior motive of demanding something from you at a later date in exchange for what you thought was just an act of kindness or a friendly support.

    Perhaps they shower you in praise (also known as “love-bombing”) or gifts then blow up at you if you don’t intuitively know they’re expecting something back from you. None of us are mind-readers, but controlling people behave as though everyone else should think and act like they want others to and those who fall out of line are punished for failing to meet their impossible expectations.

    A controlling person may also threaten to withhold support if you don’t adhere to their demands, but they do so in such subtle ways that the guilt they impose blinds you from the unreasonable nature of their behaviors.

    Some statements to be wary of include:

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    • “I did ___________ for you. What do you mean you can’t do ___________ for me?”
    • “Remember how I helped you with ___________? That took a lot of time and energy from me, but I guess you didn’t appreciate my help.”
    • “I always give you ___________. Don’t you care about my needs too?”
    • “You’re so selfish!” or “You don’t care about me at all!” (gaslighting if you respond with hesitation or politely decline their request for help for perfectly valid reasons, such as not having enough time or resources to assist them)

    3. They Criticize Everything

    One of the most common telltale signs of a controlling person is their capacity to criticize anything and everything, even small things that seemingly don’t matter. As with many toxic traits in relationships, these problems typically start out so small that you may not even notice. At first, you may even agree with their criticism or at least be able to understand their perspective when they bring up an issue.

    However, the criticism tends to get more intense, more constant, and more perplexing for people who maintain relationships with controlling people. You’ll likely notice how they rarely seem to criticize something they do. It’s almost always other-oriented and these types of people are so manipulative that any rationale they offer can seem plausibly legitimate.

    Some warning signs of a controlling person who’s overly critical to the point of abusiveness include:

    • Criticizing things about you that you have little to no control over (e.g., appearance, disability, family)
    • Criticizing your personal choices and interests, such as educational pursuits, career, clothing, favorite music, time spent on your hobbies, etc.
    • Punishing you for expressing vulnerability by invalidating thoughts and feelings you share with them
    • Attacking you whenever you express an opinion counter to theirs

    4. They Balk When Someone Criticizes Them

    We all know the adage, “what goes around, comes around.” But this statement doesn’t apply as much to toxic, controlling people. They’d much prefer to dish out criticism without ever having to take it in return.

    For instance, if your friend constantly talks about your appearance with little regard for your emotions but flips out if you make just a single comment about their appearance, there’s a possibility that they could have some hidden controlling tendencies left unchecked. Remember, these people aren’t just controlling in their behaviors towards others. They’re also actively trying to stay in complete control over every aspect of their lives, which includes how others view them.

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    This seemingly insatiable desire for control can prompt them to lash out against even the smallest bits of criticism, leaving people around them too weary or scared to speak up again in the future. While it’s possible they may suffer from something called rejection sensitivity dysphoria, this does not excuse them from the consequences of their words and actions. They should seek professional help to better manage their reactions to criticism.

    5. They Socially Isolate You

    Not all controlling people do this, but for manipulative narcissists, socially isolating victims is a go-to strategy for maintaining control because it’s effective at preventing people from truly understanding how toxic their partner, family member, or friend is treating them. Think of it this way—if you don’t talk to many other people in your life, there’s less of a risk that you’ll damage their reputation by revealing their abusive tendencies.

    Socially isolating others also gives the person more control over you and your life as it becomes more difficult to break away from them if you don’t have other healthier channels of communication and interpersonal support to turn to.

    This process doesn’t happen overnight, nor is it something you can readily recognize as abusive. At first, it may seem reasonable, such as asking you to stop engaging so often with family members with whom both of you disagree on major social or political issues. As the social isolation progresses, they may suggest cutting people out of your life—especially if they don’t like that person, regardless of how you personally feel—or even conjure up high-stakes problems like “it’s me or them” under the guise of saving you from people in your life whom they don’t like for whatever reason.

    In a controlling person’s life narrative, they’re always the protagonist who’s incapable of any wrongdoing. The blame is always redirected at someone else, whether that’s you or other people in your life. The more they isolate you from other supportive people in your life, the more susceptible you’ll be to falsely believing that they’re right and you “don’t need” your other friends and family when you have someone as perfect as this person.

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    6. They’re Emotionally Abusive

    It’s hard enough to be in control of your own emotions but when someone else is constantly belittling you and your interests or leveraging guilt and shame to manipulate you into saying or doing what they want, this can make it even more challenging to stay in control of your own life and emotional well-being.

    Emotional abuse is another sign of a controlling person that is often overlooked in relationships. After all, human personalities vary widely in terms of passivity, and it’s not uncommon for one person in a relationship to be significantly more passive than the other. This becomes an issue when the controlling partner or friend exudes signs of emotional abuse, which can start subtly and become much more pronounced over time.

    Concerning signs of emotionally abusive language or behavior to watch out for include:

    • Dismissing your needs and/or belittling your interests in counterproductive ways
    • Privately or publicly shaming or humiliating you
    • Making you feel as though you can never live up to their expectations or do anything right (according to their own vague, subjective standards)
    • Gaslighting you into thinking they said or did something that never actually happened (making you question your own reality)

    Final Thoughts

    It’s sometimes hard to see the negative things about someone with whom we have a relationship. We may sometimes unconsciously overlook the signs of a controlling person, especially if that person is someone we have known for a long time or are close to us. However, cutting them off your life is the best thing you can do for yourself. Just watch out for these six signs of a controlling person and take immediate action when you spot them.

    More Tips on How To Deal With a Controlling Person

    Featured photo credit: Külli Kittus via unsplash.com

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