Advertising
Advertising

5 Things to Look for in a Potential Roommate or Tenant

5 Things to Look for in a Potential Roommate or Tenant

So you’ve found the perfect home, and you’re looking for someone to take up residence there. Whether it’s going to be you and a roommate, or you’re looking for someone else to live in your home, it is essential that you find a tidy, reliable, and friendly person to share your place of residence. Everyone has heard the roommate horror stories of destroyed property, missed rent, and unsavoury houseguests. Better learn to weed out the riff raff before anyone signs a lease or roommate agreement. These five simple things to look out for will save you or your property managers a great deal of headache.

1. Do they look nice, and are their clothes well-kempt?

First impressions are important. When planning for a job interview or the first day of class at school, just about everyone will consider what they’re going to wear and how they will put on their best face for their new classmates or potential coworkers. Why should it be any different for a roommate or tenant? A potential renter who cares how they come across to you is the type of fastidious person you want sharing your home. If they can’t make an effort with themselves, how can you expect them to care about two weeks’ worth of dishes piling up in the sink?

Advertising

2. Are they happy to have a friendly conversation?

A great roommate or tenant is one you can have a friendly working relationship with. In every cohabitation situation, there’s going to be a time where you’ll have to hash out how chores, food, and houseguests can be managed, and the outcome is going to have to work for both of you. Try having a pleasant conversation with your potential flatmate or tenant. Are they bright and forthcoming, or surly and withdrawn? Even if there are disagreements, it’s far preferable to work them through face-to-face with a reasonable, mature adult instead of pushing notes under each other’s doors.

Advertising

3. Are they forthcoming with references?

Everyone has a past, for better or for worse, but even if everyone gets a chance, it’s better for you to be prepared than to enter into a legal agreement with someone whose track record you don’t know. There are a few different camps when it comes to how many references you should ask for, but the general feeling is the same: if your potential renter shies away from your reference request, then likely they’ve got something to hide and maybe you should shy away from them.

Advertising

4. Do they have pets?

Sure, the idea of a nice cat or dog to keep you company sounds pretty great at first, but that’s before a week of sleepless nights punctuated by claws skittering up and down the hallway. Before you agree to share your house with people and animals, make sure you know what kind, how many, and how friendly they are. Nobody wants to be explaining to the FedEx guy why their roommate’s untrained dog is currently hanging off his forearm. Most of all, know yourself. Do you want alone time and hairless clothing? Maybe animals aren’t for you. Choose your flatmate accordingly.

5. Is their employment situation stable?

If you’ve ever rented an apartment before, you know that feeling when half your paycheck turns into rent. Whether you’re renting out your basement suite to help pay your mortgage or looking for someone to live in that spare room, you need to be positive that their bank account can handle the hit, so yours doesn’t have to take two. Sure, some people win the lottery or inherit thousands from their rich uncle, but the best way to ensure regular rent payments are made is by choosing a housemate who has a regular income and knows the value of money. Keep in mind that someone who works part time for minimum wage is going to struggle to pay $1500 for a luxury apartment. If your place is out of their price range, they might be out of the running.

Advertising

More by this author

Josh MacDonald

Internet Entrepreneur

guy friend 8 Ways to Judge If Your Girlfriend’s Male Friend Is Actually a Friend 5 Reasons Why Random People Follow You On Social Media Google Organic Search 2017 CTR 5 SEO Tips To Help Your Blog Grow In 2017 5 Ways to Get Your Degree for Free 5 Things to Look for in a Potential Roommate or Tenant

Trending in Lifestyle

1 How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries 2 18 Benefits of Journaling That Will Change Your Life 3 10 Easy At-Home Leg Toning Workouts for Women 4 10 Best Wireless Headphones For Running 5 9 Best Blood Pressure Monitors You Can Use at Home

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

Advertising

Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

Advertising

You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

Advertising

  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

Advertising

Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

Read Next