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5 easy things we’ve forgotten about kids

5 easy things we’ve forgotten about kids

As I near what I hope is just the middle part of my life, I find myself intrigued by a simple article in our community’s newspaper. Each week, a group of kids is selected at one elementary school to answer one question.

The most recent question posed to these kids was, “What is the hardest thing about being a kid” and as I read through each answer, I found myself giggling at the things kids view as “hard.” For example, one young boy said it’s too hard to “go on the monkey bars, but he could go on the swings.” I could more closely relate to some of the answers more than others. “It’s hard to draw inside the lines” and “Trying to sit still is hard” were two answers given by the children. I secretly wanted to whisper to them, “This doesn’t get easier — at least in my case.”

The first thing I thought of when I was skimming over the pictures of the smiling kids was how easy these kids have it. I mean, seriously? It’s hard to sit “criss cross applesauce?” Anyone can do that, right? What about the girl that said “being good is hard” — is it really that hard to be good?

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I digress.

That’s when it hit me…I forgot what it was like to be a kid. Because as an adult, I have much bigger things to process.

So here are 5 things most adults have forgotten about kids:

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Kids love their birthdays

Who wouldn’t when you are no longer 7 — because now you are 8!!! They even know when their half-birthdays are and make sure to announce it to the world! On their special day, that is exactly how they feel. They feel loved and love the attention. Sometimes, it’s about the cake and presents, but one day, they will love that someone cared enough to be there for them…to help them celebrate. Never downplay the importance of a child’s birthday…that day is right up there with the other big holidays. But they know that day is theirs.

 Kids aren’t fake

They don’t know how to be. We teach them to be honest and to say what they think and feel. How many times have we told them, “Use your words” and yet we are surprised when they are brutally honest with us? There is a cereal commercial highlighting this same point — kids may not be shy about telling you that your stomach is hairy or asking why your legs make noises when you walk. We want to pretend that they only notice what we teach them, but believe me, they are paying way more attention than we give them credit for…and they remind us ever so often too.

Kids need their friends

In a world when adults have learned to rely more on themselves or a smaller group of close confidants, kids want to be liked by lots of people. They want to be included in the games you play at recess and to be invited to their classmates birthday party. They want to matter and friendships remind them that they do. Sitting alone at a lunch table is heartbreaking for any adult to see…imagine what it is like for that kid.

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Kids are watching us

As I mentioned earlier, we might believe that kids are only learning things in school or when we make a point to teach them something, but in reality, they are watching, processing, and chances are, they are mimicking us more than we even think. They pick up on the words we say (yes, even the bad ones), our mannerisms, and our values. If they see us being kind to strangers or yelling at our spouse, they will keep that as an experience to use later on in their own lives. We can never really know how much they get from us until we hear our 5 year old yell from the back seat, “Crap!” because they dropped their juice box down the side of their seat. Not one of those proud mama moments for me, that’s for sure.

Kids aren’t afraid to dream

Let’s face it. Kids dream and they dream BIG. They don’t just want to be a nurse or a mom, they want to protect the most endangered species on the earth, climb Mt. Everest, and run 5 marathons…all before they are 30. They hit the gate running and before we can explain to them how the real life works, they are already on their way. As we get older, we put our dreams aside and instead, succumb to the life of responsibility and societal norm. Kids always believe in the magic of their dreams and the hopes for their future.

Conclusion:

Kids remind us to be authentic with one another — there is a difference between being truthful and being hurtful. Because of them, we can look back at the years and feel truly blessed by the journey we have taken…with the places we have been, the people we met along the way, and the memories we have made along the way. Having the right kind of people around us — whether they be family or friend — makes life that much more enjoyable. Be grateful for those people who make our lives better because we still need our friends too.

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Kids teach us to be the kind of people we want to be. Without knowing it, they help us correct our mistakes as we strive to be better because of them. No adult wants to be known as the grouch at the end of the block or the man who yells at everyone at the local ballpark. Seriously? That’s not our legacy. Nothing is more exciting than watching a dream come to fruition. Kids remind us to give a chance to something that might never be, but to ignore it is a much worse fate.

We may be older, but sometimes, it’s hard being an adult. Because we forget things.

Featured photo credit: Ben White/Unsplash via hd.unsplash.com

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Michelle A. Homme

Author, Speaker, Quote Writer, Empowerment Coach

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Last Updated on March 14, 2019

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

Recruiters might hold thousands of interviews in their careers and a lot of them are reporting the same thing—that most candidates play it safe with the questions they ask, or have no questions to ask in a job interview at all.

For job applicants, this approach is crazy! This is a job that you’re going to dedicate a lot of hours to and that might have a huge impact on your future career. Don’t throw away the chance to figure out if the position is perfect for you.

Here are 7 killer questions to ask in a job interview that will both impress your counterpart and give you some really useful insights into whether this job will be a dream … or a nightmare.

1. What are some challenges I might come up against this role?

A lesser candidate might ask, “what does a typical day look like in this role?” While this is a perfectly reasonable question to ask in an interview, focusing on potential challenges takes you much further because it indicates that you already are visualizing yourself in the role.

It’s impressive because it shows that you are not afraid of challenges, and you are prepared to strategize a game plan upfront to make sure you succeed if you get the job.

It can also open up a conversation about how you’ve solved problems in the past which can be a reassuring exercise for both you and the hiring manager.

How it helps you:

If you ask the interviewer to describe a typical day, you may get a vibrant picture of all the lovely things you’ll get to do in this job and all the lovely people you’ll get to do them with.

Asking about potential roadblocks means you hear the other side of the story—dysfunctional teams, internal politics, difficult clients, bootstrap budgets and so on. This can help you decide if you’re up for the challenge or whether, for the sake of your sanity, you should respectfully decline the job offer.

2. What are the qualities of really successful people in this role?

Employers don’t want to hire someone who goes through the motions; they want to hire someone who will excel.

Asking this question shows that you care about success, too. How could they not hire you with a dragon-slayer attitude like that?

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How it helps you:

Interviewers hire people who are great people to work with, but the definition of “great people” differs from person to person.

Does this company hire and promote people with a specific attitude, approach, worth ethic or communication style? Are the most successful people in this role strong extroverts who love to talk and socialize when you are studious and reserved? Does the company reward those who work insane hours when you’re happiest in a more relaxed environment?

If so, then this may not be the right match for you.

Whatever the answer is, you can decide whether you have what it takes for the manager to be happy with your performance in this role. And if the interviewer has no idea what success looks like for this position, this is a sign to proceed with extreme caution.

3. From the research I did on your company, I noticed the culture really supports XYZ. Can you tell me more about that element of the culture and how it impacts this job role?

Of course, you could just ask “what is the culture like here? ” but then you would miss a great opportunity to show that you’ve done your research!

Interviewers give BIG bonus point to those who read up and pay attention, and you’ve just pointed out that (a) you’re diligent in your research (b) you care about the company culture and (c) you’re committed to finding a great cultural fit.

How it helps you:

This question is so useful because it lets you pick an element of the culture that you really care about and that will have the most impact on whether you are happy with the organization.

For example, if training and development is important to you, then you need to know what’s on offer so you don’t end up in a dead-end job with no learning opportunities.

Companies often talk a good talk, and their press releases may be full of shiny CSR initiatives and all the headline-grabbing diversity programs they’re putting in place. This is your opportunity to look under the hood and see if the company lives its values on the ground.

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A company that says it is committed to doing the right thing by customers should not judge success by the number of up-sells an employee makes, for instance. Look for consistency, so you aren’t in for a culture shock after you start.

4. What is the promotion path for this role, and how would my performance on that path be measured?

To be clear, you are not asking when you will get promoted. Don’t go there—it’s presumptuous, and it indicates that you think you are better than the role you have applied for.

A career-minded candidate, on the other hand, usually has a plan that she’s working towards. This question shows you have a great drive toward growth and advancement and an intention to stick with the company beyond your current state.

How it helps you:

One word: hierarchy.

All organizations have levels of work and authority—executives, upper managers, line managers, the workforce, and so on. Understanding the hierarchical structure gives you power, because you can decide if you can work within it and are capable of climbing through its ranks, or whether it will be endlessly frustrating to you.

In a traditional pyramid hierarchy, for example, the people at the bottom tend to have very little autonomy to make decisions. This gets better as you rise up through the pyramid, but even middle managers have little power to create policy; they are more concerned with enforcing the rules the top leaders make.

If having a high degree of autonomy and accountability is important to you, you may do better in a flat hierarchy where work teams can design their own way of achieving the corporate goals.

5. What’s the most important thing the successful candidate could accomplish in their first 3 months/6 months/year?

Of all the questions to ask in a job interview, this one is impressive because it shows that you identify with and want to be a successful performer, and not just an average one.

Here, you’re drilling down into what the company needs, and needs quite urgently, proving that you’re all about adding value to the organization and not just about what’s in it for you.

How it helps you:

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Most job descriptions come with 8, 10 or 12 different job responsibilities and a lot of them with be boilerplate or responsibilities that someone in HR thinks are associated with this role. This question gives you a better sense of which responsibilities are the most important—and they may not be what initially attracted you to the role.

If you like the idea of training juniors, for example, but success is judged purely on your sales figures, then is this really the job you thought you were applying for?

This question will also give you an idea of what kind of learning curve you’re expected to have and whether you’ll get any ramp-up time before getting down to business. If you’re the type of person who likes to jump right in and get things done, for instance, you may not be thrilled to hear that you’re going to spend the first three months shadowing a peer.

6. What do you like about working here?

This simple question is all about building rapport with the interviewer. People like to talk about themselves, and the interviewer will be flattered that you’re interested in her opinions.

Hopefully, you’ll find some great connection points that the two of you share. What similar things drive you head into the office each day? How will you fit into the culture?

How it helps you:

You can learn a lot from this question. Someone who genuinely enjoys his job will be able to list several things they like, and their answers will sound passionate and sincere. If not….well, you might consider that a red flag.

Since you potentially can learn a lot about the company culture from this question, it’s a good idea to figure out upfront what’s important to you. Maybe you’re looking for a hands-off boss who values independent thought and creativity? Maybe you work better in environments that move at a rapid, exciting pace?

Whatever’s important to you, listen carefully and see if you can find any common ground.

7. Based on this interview, do you have any questions or concerns about my qualifications for the role?

What a great closing question to ask in a job interview! It shows that you’re not afraid of feedback—in fact, you are inviting it. Not being able to take criticism is a red flag for employers, who need to know that you’ll act on any “coaching moments” with a good heart.

As a bonus, asking this question shows that you are really interested in the position and wish to clear up anything that may be holding the company back from hiring you.

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How it helps you:

What a devious beast this question is! On the surface, it looks straightforward, but it’s actually giving you four key pieces of information.

First, is the manager capable of giving you feedback when put on the spot like this? Some managers are scared of giving feedback, or don’t think it’s important enough to bother outside of a formal performance appraisal. Do you want to work for a boss like that? How will you improve if no one is telling you what you did wrong?

Second, can the manager give feedback in a constructive way without being too pillowy or too confrontational? It’s unfair to expect the interviewer to have figured out your preferred way of receiving feedback in the space of an interview, but if she come back with a machine-gun fire of shortcomings or one of those corporate feedback “sandwiches” (the doozy slipped between two slices of compliment), then you need to ask yourself, can you work with someone who gives feedback like that?

Third, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about before you leave the interview. This gives you the chance to make a final, tailored sales pitch so you can convince the interviewer that she should not be worried about those things.

Fourth, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about period. If turnover is keeping him up at night, then your frequent job hopping might get a lot of additional scrutiny. If he’s facing some issues with conflict or communication, then he might raise concerns regarding your performance in this area.

Listen carefully: the concerns that are being raised about you might actually be a proxy for problems in the wider organization.

Making Your Interview Work for You

Interviews are a two-way street. While it is important to differentiate yourself from every other candidate, understand that convincing the interviewer you’re the right person for the role goes hand-in-hand with figuring out if the job is the right fit for you.

Would you feel happy in a work environment where the people, priorities, culture and management style were completely at odds with the way you work? Didn’t think so!

More Resources About Job Interviews

Featured photo credit: Amy Hirschi via unsplash.com

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