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Little Girl Said The Most Embarrassing Thing To Auntie That Made Her Quit Smoking Finally

Little Girl Said The Most Embarrassing Thing To Auntie That Made Her Quit Smoking Finally

About 4 years ago, I used to occasionally have a cigarette after lunch or dinner. When I used to visit my brother, I would make sure that my niece doesn’t see me because I know she loves me so much and I didn’t want her to think smoking is okay.
So apparently, while I would sneak to the balcony to enjoy my cigarette, she would follow me and watch me smoke from behind the balcony door.
Most of my family didn’t know I was a occasional smoker and it is really a stigma in my family to smoke cigarettes, etc.

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So fast forward few months, we are at a big family wedding everyone is sitting together having a great time and she looks at me and says :
“I love you auntie. I just want you to know that you shouldn’t smoke because it will make you age and die quickly. Plus you keep hiding in the balcony thinking I wouldn’t see you. So obviously you know it is wrong since you are hiding it !”

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I didn’t say a word. My face turned red and I felt everyone looking at me in shock !
Her mother looks at her and says, no your auntie doesn’t smoke, you must be mistaken.
To that she answered : “why are you trying to make me lie, that’s worse than smoking”

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Everyone laughed. And I changed the subject immediately!
I no longer smoke and I hope she doesn’t remember.

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One of the most precious gifts relatives can give one another is a dose of harsh realism mixed in with love. Hearing that a family member wants only the best for us can provide us with the encouragement we need to make changes that are long overdue. It can be difficult to hear the full implications of our actions spelled out to us, but when someone gives us constructive criticism or makes a suggestion from a place of love and support, it’s usually a good idea to pay attention.

Credit: Rafika Sarraf/Quora

Featured photo credit: Rafika Sarraf/Quora via quora.com

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Jay Hill

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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