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What All Millennial Divorced Mothers Want You To Know Before Dating Them

What All Millennial Divorced Mothers Want You To Know Before Dating Them

The millennials who made Generation X raise their eyebrows not long ago are now becoming parents on their own. With 1 in 5 mothers being millennials, there are roughly 9 million millennial mothers raising kids. Unfortunately, many of them are also single mothers, as millennials seem to marry in a hurry and divorce in the same hurry.

This is why many young women in their 20s and early 30s, are now leaving the casual sex relationships and flirty texting, for changing diapers. However, just because they are raising a kid – or multiple – doesn’t mean these women have given up on finding love. Due to misconceptions, men believe a single mother is not “datable” anymore, which is completely wrong. Even mothers need love and crave sex– even if they don’t need another spouse. Here are some of the most important things a millennial divorced single mother wants you to know before dating her.

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1. I don’t want to get married

At least for some time, a woman who has been in a marriage and has had a child is not willing to re-marry quite soon. The sheer amount of money and time she gave to divorce attorneys is enough to make her cringe at the thought of going through another marriage. A single mother is not going to jump into another marriage, because her regained independence is everything for her, along with her child. Of course, this makes things a bit complicated when it comes to having a relationship: while the mother is not going to look for someone for “forever after”, she is not looking for a one night stand either. The balance between these two is delicate.

2. Planning and organizing my life is the norm

Lovers enjoy a spontaneous trip abroad or to the countryside, but when you have a kid, this is out of the question. A single mom has to plan everything, from the guitar classes her child takes and the time spent by the child with their father, to the 30-minute walk down the park she enjoys alone and even the sexy time. Yes, this is a little hard, especially for a single man who would love to be able to pick up his date and drive to nowhere. Finding some free time on both sides is not impossible, but it can become a challenge.

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3. I don’t want you to play “daddy”

There are two types of women: those who introduce their kids to their dates right away and those who don’t. Yet both of these single mothers don’t want their dates to play “daddy” for their kids. The child already has a dad, as bad as he might be, so there is no need for another one.

4. I am not “playing hard to get”

Men who think single mothers just “play hard to get” when they say they can’t make time for that romantic date. Single parenting is hard and it leaves little to no room for texting back. If you can’t understand this, you should probably quit dating a single mother, because her life is not going to change for you. She will always have to attend work, be social and deal with all her parenting duties, which include making cookies and attending school concerts.

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5. I don’t want to talk about my child, even if I do talk about him or her

A single mother’s life is 90% about her child, but the rest of 10% is about her. Even if she does talk a lot about her child’s latest achievements, a millennial mother is interested in her job, her friends and her hobbies. When she became a mother she hasn’t ceased to be a millennial woman, so all that funny, high tech and deeply insecure in her own place in the world. At the end of the day, she is still a millennial!

The millennial mother is still interested in how to make her hair grow longer, she is still relying on dating apps and she might screenshot her texts to talk about them with her friends.

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If you want to conquer her heart, recognize her individuality as a person, her femininity and her sex-appeal. When she starts talking about the kid, listen to her, but do ask more about her, because all single mothers need more “me” time, especially on a date.

Millennial mothers have learned their lives don’t revolve around their kids. They know they have a different identity and know how to prioritize their own identities. They know how to separate their time as professionals, mothers and women. Moreover, they know they have to right to be happy and enjoy a healthy intimate life, which makes dating them a completely different experience.

Featured photo credit: Stocksy via stocksy.com

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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