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The 4 Steps To A Successful Divorce Settlement

The 4 Steps To A Successful Divorce Settlement

As any woman going through a divorce knows, stress and confusion go hand in hand, especially when divorce occurs earlier on in life. Trying to sort through legal and financial matters while also coping with emotional turmoil can easily lead to poor decision making—with costly long-term consequences.

In order to ensure that your divorce proceeds as smoothly as possible, try to adhere to the divorce management strategies outlined below. While there’s no one “right” way to cope with divorce, this time-tested advice will stand you in good stead to start rebuilding your life.

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1. Give yourself time

Many women make the mistake of trying to ignore the conflicting emotions surrounding their divorce by immersing themselves in the many practical tasks that come with organizing a separation. This, however, is a surefire route to burnout and possibly even a breakdown. Instead of trying to take care of everyone and everything else, take care of yourself first. Talk to a trusted friend, a family member, or a counsellor and don’t hesitate to ask for their advice on how you ought to go forward with your life. Objective insight is incredibly valuable when a person is feeling overwhelmed.

2. Choose your legal counsel wisely

Remember, no two law firms are exactly the same; legal professionals have many different areas of expertise, so it’s incredibly important to choose a lawyer who has a strong background in family law. Christine K. Clifford, CEO of Divorcing Divas, learned this the hard way: “I used a criminal attorney,” says Clifford, “and got a poor settlement.”

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Conversely, a lawyer who’s well-versed in the ins and outs of family law is likely to get you a better settlement than you expect; he or she will understand the complexities of the laws in your area, as well as being familiar with local judges and lawyers. Tim Moynahan, a Family Lawyer in Waterbury, CT reminds us that “You should be aware that if you and your partner have a long list of combined assets, you may need additional legal aid, e.g. from a financial planner”.

3. When you’re ready, gather all of the relevant financial information you can find

According to financial analyst and divorcee advocate Sandy Arons, fully 40% of divorce proceedings revolve around money. Your divorce will therefore go much more smoothly if you accrue as much information as possible about your shared assets and bank accounts before you head to court.

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Jacqueline Newman, a partner at a boutique New York City law firm specializing in divorce, says that you should “Learn all of the online passwords to bank accounts, which accounts had automatic payments and where money is invested, including the names of all accounts, the account numbers and the investment advisors.” Seek advice from your lawyer as you do so and, if possible, also seek the advice of an accountant with a background in handling the financial affairs of divorcing couples.

4. Calculate Future Living Expenses

This tip comes to us from Max Smelyansky, a Family Lawyer in Albany, NY. Max says it’s important to calculate your future living expenses and account for inflation. Once you have assessed your current financial situation with the aid of your lawyer and accountant, the next step is calculating your future living expenses (using your current living expenses as a guide). As divorce financial expert and mediator Rosemary Frank so aptly put it, “Raw emotions will heal and legalities will be completed, but the financial impact of poor decisions, or default decisions due to lack of understanding, will last a lifetime… If you don’t know what you’ll need in the future, you won’t be able to ask for it and you surely won’t get it.”

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Remember, those who fail to plan—and plan with the right professional assistance—plan to fail. If you are currently getting divorced or think you may be divorcing in the future, seek legal and financial counsel as soon as possible.

Featured photo credit: pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

Learning how to get in shape and set goals is important if you’re looking to live a healthier lifestyle and get closer to your goal weight. While this does require changes to your daily routine, you’ll find that you are able to look and feel better in only two weeks.

Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about what it takes to get in shape. Although anyone can cover the basics (eat right and exercise), there are some things that I could only learn through trial and error. Let’s cover some of the most important points for how to get in shape in two weeks.

1. Exercise Daily

It is far easier to make exercise a habit if it is a daily one. If you aren’t exercising at all, I recommend starting by exercising a half hour every day. When you only exercise a couple times per week, it is much easier to turn one day off into three days off, a week off, or a month off.

If you are already used to exercising, switching to three or four times a week to fit your schedule may be preferable, but it is a lot harder to maintain a workout program you don’t do every day.

Be careful to not repeat the same exercise routine each day. If you do an intense ab workout one day, try switching it up to general cardio the next. You can also squeeze in a day of light walking to break up the intensity.

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If you’re a morning person, check out these morning exercises that will start your day off right.

2. Duration Doesn’t Substitute for Intensity

Once you get into the habit of regular exercise, where do you go if you still aren’t reaching your goals? Most people will solve the problem by exercising for longer periods of time, turning forty-minute workouts into two hour stretches. Not only does this drain your time, but it doesn’t work particularly well.

One study shows that “exercising for a whole hour instead of a half does not provide any additional loss in either body weight or fat”[1].

This is great news for both your schedule and your levels of motivation. You’ll likely find it much easier to exercise for 30 minutes a day instead of an hour. In those 30 minutes, do your best to up the intensity to your appropriate edge to get the most out of the time.

3. Acknowledge Your Limits

Many people get frustrated when they plateau in their weight loss or muscle gaining goals as they’re learning how to get in shape. Everyone has an equilibrium and genetic set point where their body wants to remain. This doesn’t mean that you can’t achieve your fitness goals, but don’t be too hard on yourself if you are struggling to lose weight or put on muscle.

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Acknowledging a set point doesn’t mean giving up, but it does mean realizing the obstacles you face.

Expect to hit a plateau in your own fitness results[2]. When you expect a plateau, you can manage around it so you can continue your progress at a more realistic rate. When expectations meet reality, you can avoid dietary crashes.

4. Eat Healthy, Not Just Food That Looks Healthy

Know what you eat. Don’t fuss over minutia like whether you’re getting enough Omega 3’s or tryptophan, but be aware of the big things. Look at the foods you eat regularly and figure out whether they are healthy or not. Don’t get fooled by the deceptively healthy snacks just pretending to be good for you.

The basic nutritional advice includes:

  • Eat unprocessed foods
  • Eat more veggies
  • Use meat as a side dish, not a main course
  • Eat whole grains, not refined grains[3]

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Eat whole grains when you want to learn how to get in shape.

    5. Watch Out for Travel

    Don’t let a four-day holiday interfere with your attempts when you’re learning how to get in shape. I don’t mean that you need to follow your diet and exercise plan without any excursion, but when you are in the first few weeks, still forming habits, be careful that a week long break doesn’t terminate your progress.

    This is also true of schedule changes that leave you suddenly busy or make it difficult to exercise. Have a backup plan so you can be consistent, at least for the first month when you are forming habits.

    If travel is on your schedule and can’t be avoided, make an exercise plan before you go[4], and make sure to pack exercise clothes and an exercise mat as motivation to keep you on track.

    6. Start Slow

    Ever start an exercise plan by running ten miles and then puking your guts out? Maybe you aren’t that extreme, but burnout is common early on when learning how to get in shape. You have a lifetime to be healthy, so don’t try to go from couch potato to athletic superstar in a week.

    If you are starting a running regime, for example, run less than you can to start. Starting strength training? Work with less weight than you could theoretically lift. Increasing intensity and pushing yourself can come later when your body becomes comfortable with regular exercise.

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    7. Be Careful When Choosing a Workout Partner

    Should you have a workout partner? That depends. Workout partners can help you stay motivated and make exercising more fun. But they can also stop you from reaching your goals.

    My suggestion would be to have a workout partner, but when you start to plateau (either in physical ability, weight loss/gain, or overall health) and you haven’t reached your goals, consider mixing things up a bit.

    If you plateau, you may need to make changes to continue improving. In this case it’s important to talk to your workout partner about the changes you want to make, and if they don’t seem motivated to continue, offer a thirty day break where you both try different activities.

    I notice that guys working out together tend to match strength after a brief adjustment phase. Even if both are trying to improve, something seems to stall improvement once they reach a certain point. I found that I was able to lift as much as 30-50% more after taking a short break from my regular workout partner.

    Final Thoughts

    Learning how to get in shape in as little as two weeks sounds daunting, but if you’re motivated and have the time and energy to devote to it, it’s certainly possible.

    Find an exercise routine that works for you, eat healthy, drink lots of water, and watch as the transformation begins.

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    Featured photo credit: Alexander Redl via unsplash.com

    Reference

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