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7 Things Every Guy Needs to Consider Before Getting Down on One Knee

7 Things Every Guy Needs to Consider Before Getting Down on One Knee

If you are thinking of proposing to your girlfriend soon, there are some things you should consider before doing so. You don’t want to just jump right in without being prepared first. Being prepared for something this important in your life is very important because you don’t want anything backfiring on you when she says no. You want to do everything possible to make sure she says yes, so check out these 7 things every guy needs to consider before getting down on one knee.

1. Make Sure She Will Say Yes

First, before you go out of your way to get a ring for her or plan to make this the most romantic thing for the two of you, you want to make sure she is going to say yes. You can do this by uncovering some knowledge about what she will say during the conversations the two of you have.

Has she ever said she doesn’t want to get married? If she hasn’t, then this could possibly mean she will say yes. Also, make sure she wants you as her husband. Does she constantly say, “When can we get married?” or “Are you ever going to marry me?” If she does, then you know she will say yes. Look out for subtle signs.

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2. Don’t Make it Obvious You Are Going to Propose

You want her to be surprised so try not to make it too obvious, but you also don’t want her to think you don’t want to marry her either. Although you want to plan it, you don’t want her to find out by giving it away either.

You could tell her “someday” you will ask her but don’t let her know when because it should be a huge surprise. Keeping it from her might be a little difficult, especially when you try not to keep things from her. However, this one time won’t hurt and she will be very happy that you surprised her.

3. Don’t Let Anyone Else Know

Another way of keeping her from finding out is by not letting anyone else know you are going to ask her to marry you. You should keep it from everyone because you never know who is going to slip out and tell her about the surprise. You have worked so hard in planning this huge surprise and don’t want anyone ruining it for you or her.

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You should definitely not tell her family or her friends and try to keep it from your family and friends because they could even slip out and tell her. You don’t know who you can trust to keep this one huge surprise from her so keep it to yourself.

4. Finding the Right Ring

You want to find the perfect ring for her; one that she will cherish and love for the rest of her life. You want to make sure it fits her but realize that size doesn’t really matter as long as it is not too small to fit.

The main things you want to be aware of when buying something so important includes cut, color, clarity, and carat. The most important thing she will see is how big the diamond is and how shiny it is. Although many guys tend to think that size is the most important aspect of a ring for their girlfriend, this isn’t the most important. You should work with the jeweler to make sure your ring is edited to look the best and within your budget, of course.

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What you should do is find the perfect ring for her and an affordable one for you, and make it personal for her. Have the jeweler make it the way she will like it. The most popular diamond there is for an engagement ring is the brilliant round cut. This is because, depending on the design you choose, it shall reflect your feelings towards her.

5. Be Creative With How you Propose

Everyone is going to be asking you both how you proposed so you want to be as creative as possible. This is not the only reason you want to be creative though. You also want her to really love how you popped the question. Make it more about her, than you. You know what she likes so make it fun, creative, and in a way she will always remember.

6. Make Sure You Both Look Nice When you Pop the Question

The reason for this is because you know she will want to start taking pictures. Because of this, you will both want to be picture ready. The perfect way to have her picture ready is to let her think you are taking her some place nice and fancy.

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This way, she will get dressed up and you will both be picture ready without her knowing the real reason for it. Don’t think she will be disappointed if you don’t take her to her favorite restaurant, after all she will then have a beautiful diamond ring on her finger and will be marrying the man she loves, you.

7. Try To Make it Earlier in the Day When you Propose

You will want to make sure it is earlier in the day that you propose, this way you won’t be too nervous and you will have the rest of the day for making phone calls to tell your friends and family and for the congratulatory emails you will get. You will want to call and tell everyone you know about what happened on this awesome day. You will also want to reply to those congratulatory emails and send out thank you cards. Also, she will want to start planning the wedding already!

All-in-all, make it a day about her but also about the both of you. You want everything to go smoothly for you two and to make sure you are both as happy as you should be. Also, no matter how confident you think you are, you are going to be nervous but once she says yes, it will all be worth.

Featured photo credit: pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Ahmed Raza

CEO of Samurais.co

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Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

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