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Is Your Tinder Date Lying To You? Run A Background Check

Is Your Tinder Date Lying To You? Run A Background Check

Nine in 10 Americans are using online dating platforms nowadays, when meeting your significant other online is not a stigmatized act anymore. If you would have told someone you’ve met your partner online 20 years ago, eyebrows would raise as you would have gotten disapproving looks. Things changed a lot in the last 20 years and now a survey by Pew Research showed that one in five adults aged between 25-35 are looking for their partner online and two thirds of them had actually dated the people they met online.

Online dating is the second most common way to find your partner, following being introduced by a common friend. The billion dollar industry built with help from the 50 million Tinder users has changed the dynamics of dating and marriage, increasing the your chance to stumble upon a dangerous person. You can never know who is hiding behind an online dating profile. The number of people who are setting up fake profiles, luring honest people into a scam only to have fun, harm them or else, is growing and it also has a name: catfish scam.

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This comes with a new problem: how can you be sure the person you know online is the same person you are going to meet offline? We’ve all heard horror stories and lots of online-love-gone-wrong experiences, so before you decide what to wear to your date, you might want to background check your new date. Here are some ways to find out if your online date is lying to you or is just enhancing his/her background to impress you.

The basic: Google

The simplest check you can do on your date is a simple Google search. There are multiple ways to look for someone: you can try using the full name of the person you are looking for, quotation marks, aliases and even emails. If you can’t find anything searching for the full name, you can try putting it between quotation marks. If this is not successful, add the person’s alias to the name. You can also add the email, the school or the home town – any information you know about that person can be useful.

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Run a criminal record check

Ok, this sounds frightening, but you should conduct a criminal record check on your date, especially if you suspect something is not right or you think everything is too good to be true. Depending on the country, you need the name and the birthday of the person. Most countries and states allow you to run an online check on the local court’s website, while others ask for you to come in person. If you live in America and you have suspicions on your date’s background, it might be a good idea to run a criminal record check in multiple states.

Social media check

There is a fine line between checking someone’s social media presence and stalking him/her, but you should try to find out more about your potential date. Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are the best sources for information, but don’t neglect other social media platforms either. You can use your date’s name, alias, telephone or email address, as well as a mix between these or all of them, to be sure you have the right person in front of you.

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Reverse phone lookup

If you only have an alias or a common name and a phone number, you can do a reverse phone lookup. This is going to show you the name, address and other information about the person you are searching. Reverse phone lookups can also be done on Google and Facebook, but you should first try a specialized platform.

One’s online activity can speak a lot about that person, so you should be able to understand your potential partner better. If there are any red flags about him or her, you can take someone with you when you first date that person or you can simply give up on the date altogether. Your safety is always more important. If the steps above fail you, ask around and try to find information from people who might know the person you are “investigating”. Your potential date is going to find out about your research – don’t worry about this. They should be happy to know you are cautious and you were interested enough to want to know more about them before meeting in person.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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