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4 Reasons Why Summer Travelling Rekindles Your Soul

4 Reasons Why Summer Travelling Rekindles Your Soul

Summer is the time of the year where travelling comes into focus and self-discovery becomes an important part of it. While many prefer travelling with friends, family or even spouses, there are a certain group of people who prefer travelling alone.

These are the solo travelers. Solo travelers generally travel with one purpose: self-discovery. The calmness of our souls get disrupted during the course of our day to day lives. However, travelling to exotic places and exploring them alone allows us to rekindle our souls and refresh ourselves.

Till this very day, I crave journeys and train rides alone, it allows me to think better and understand myself more. I decided to put together a few reasons why this summer could be the change you need.

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1. Gives You a Chance to Be Exotic.

We all strive on being unique and defining ourselves, however often enough we fall into the same cycle and routine of life. The inability to cope with stressful lifestyles often push us towards depression and sadness.

One thing I’ve realized is that travelling alone allows you to be exotic or be different. Instead of adapting to the norm, you become yourself and get in touch with your own identity. Taking off the masks and being wild and free can be uplifting and produces a de stressing effect. This gives your mind the time to think and react.

Being able to breathe and ignore materialistic things allows you to reconnect with nature and get back to the basics of life.

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2. Have The Liberty to Explore.

If you’ve traveled in groups, you’ll realize it follows a typical pattern. You go around visiting every landmark, eating in expensive restaurants and visiting every museum. When its time to return, you go to shop souvenirs which might require you to purchase a second set of luggage to carry it all. You never had the liberty to explore the real culture of the country or try out any of the weird looking street food.

However, if you’re travelling alone, you’ve got the freedom to do whatever you want to do. You could go around exploring the local markets and walk around the town to meet the local people. You could sit in a local cafe and enjoy the fine coffee or go to eat some local delicacies. For example, if you’re in Iceland in August, you may have a chance to enjoy a perfect Viking dinner. If you like fermented fish, eyeballs and brains, then you will definitely be the happiest person there.

This allows you to understand yourself and other people, which becomes an important life lesson. Eventually this becomes part of your character and gives you the ammunition to take on any challenges.

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3. Food Makes the Best of Experience.

I recall travelling with my friends. Even though there are some great memories of that time, I hated the times we were dividing the bills. Its makes you forget the beautiful meal you had and leaves your mind in shambles. Deciding where to eat and budgeting a perfect place for everyone becomes a nightmare and eventually eating out becomes a tiring experience.

However, you know the best part about travelling alone is being able to eat whatever your heart desires. You get to walk around town and barge into any restaurant for hot food without worrying about sharing the bill later. You will be able to enjoy street food as well. A party in your mouth wouldn’t just be a theory, instead it will be part of your everyday travel.

Walking in China and enjoying the street food or sipping a nice cup of coffee in a cafe in Greece, the liberty of enjoying food is the best feeling ever.

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4. The Ability to Believe in Yourself.

When you follow a daily boring routine, it’s easy to stop believing in yourself. When you go through different challenges in life, you start questioning your decisions. Sometimes being surrounded by friends and family helps even less because there’s no one who can understand yourself better than yourself.

Travelling to a strange country, with strange people and being completely alone forces you to take on different challenges. You’ll be forced to be quick on your feet and will have to solve each challenges your own way. It gives you the confidence and the ability to believe in yourself and your judgments. This self-assuring confidence allows you to assess and love yourself. Instead of being your worst critic, you become your greatest lover. This new attitude eventually gets portrayed in all aspects of your life, especially your career.

In a nutshell, travelling alone rekindles your soul and gives you the self-assessment you might need after a whole year of being surrounded by work, life and routine, sometimes even the very best of people need some time to reflect.

Featured photo credit: Google Images. via aol.com

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Last Updated on January 24, 2021

How to Say No When You Know You Say Yes Too Often

How to Say No When You Know You Say Yes Too Often

Do you say yes so often that you no longer feel that your own needs are being met? Are you wondering how to say no to people?

For years, I was a serial people pleaser[1]. Known as someone who would step up, I would gladly make time, especially when it came to volunteering for certain causes. I proudly carried this role all through grade school, college, even through law school. For years, I thought saying “no” meant I would disappoint a good friend or someone I respected.

But somewhere along the way, I noticed I wasn’t quite living my life. Instead, I seem to have created a schedule that was a strange combination of meeting the expectations of others, what I thought I should be doing, and some of what I actually wanted to do. The result? I had a packed schedule that left me overwhelmed and unfulfilled.

It took a long while, but I learned the art of saying no. Saying no meant I no longer catered fully to everyone else’s needs and could make more room for what I really wanted to do. Instead of cramming too much in, I chose to pursue what really mattered. When that happened, I became a lot happier.

And guess what? I hardly disappointed anyone.

The Importance of Saying No

When you learn the art of saying no, you begin to look at the world differently. Rather than seeing all of the things you could or should be doing (and aren’t doing), you start to look at how to say yes to what’s important.

In other words, you aren’t just reacting to what life throws at you. You seek the opportunities that move you to where you want to be.

Successful people aren’t afraid to say no. Oprah Winfrey, considered one of the most successful women in the world, confessed that it was much later in life when she learned how to say no. Even after she had become internationally famous, she felt she had to say yes to virtually everything.

Being able to say no also helps you manage your time better.

Warren Buffett views “no” as essential to his success. He said:

“The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

When I made “no” a part of my toolbox, I drove more of my own success, focusing on fewer things and doing them well.

How We Are Pressured to Say Yes

It’s no wonder a lot of us find it hard to say no.

From an early age, we are conditioned to say yes. We said yes probably hundreds of times in order to graduate from high school and then get into college. We said yes to find work, to get a promotion, to find love and then yes again to stay in a relationship. We said yes to find and keep friends.

We say yes because we feel good when we help someone, because it can seem like the right thing to do, because we think that is key to success, and because the request might come from someone who is hard to resist.

And that’s not all. The pressure to say yes doesn’t just come from others. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves.

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At work, we say yes because we compare ourselves to others who seem to be doing more than we are. Outside of work, we say yes because we are feeling bad that we aren’t doing enough to spend time with family or friends.

The message, no matter where we turn, is nearly always, “You really could be doing more.” The result? When people ask us for our time, we are heavily conditioned to say yes.

How Do You Say No Without Feeling Guilty?

Deciding to add the word “no” to your toolbox is no small thing. Perhaps you already say no, but not as much as you would like. Maybe you have an instinct that if you were to learn the art of no that you could finally create more time for things you care about.

But let’s be honest, using the word “no” doesn’t come easily for many people.

3 Rules of Thumbs for Saying No

1. You Need to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Let’s face it. It is hard to say no. Setting boundaries around your time, especially you haven’t done it much in the past, will feel awkward. Your comfort zone is “yes,” so it’s time to challenge that and step outside that.

If you need help getting out of your comfort zone, check out this article.

2. You Are the Air Traffic Controller of Your Time

When you want to learn how to say no, remember that you are the only one who understands the demands for your time. Think about it: who else knows about all of the demands in your life? No one.

Only you are at the center of all of these requests. You are the only one that understands what time you really have.

3. Saying No Means Saying Yes to Something That Matters

When we decide not to do something, it means we can say yes to something else that we may care more about. You have a unique opportunity to decide how you spend your precious time.

6 Ways to Start Saying No

Incorporating that little word “no” into your life can be transformational. Turning some things down will mean you can open doors to what really matters. Here are some essential tips to learn the art of no:

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1. Check in With Your Obligation Meter

One of the biggest challenges to saying no is a feeling of obligation. Do you feel you have a responsibility to say yes and worry that saying no will reflect poorly on you?

Ask yourself whether you truly have the duty to say yes. Check your assumptions or beliefs about whether you carry the responsibility to say yes. Turn it around and instead ask what duty you owe to yourself.

2. Resist the Fear of Missing out (FOMO)

Do you have a fear of missing out (FOMO)? FOMO can follow us around in so many ways. At work, we volunteer our time because we fear we won’t move ahead. In our personal lives, we agree to join the crowd because of FOMO, even while we ourselves aren’t enjoying the fun.

Check in with yourself. Are you saying yes because of FOMO or because you really want to say yes? More often than not, running after fear doesn’t make us feel better[2].

3. Check Your Assumptions About What It Means to Say No

Do you dread the reaction you will get if you say no? Often, we say yes because we worry about how others will respond or because of the consequences. We may be afraid to disappoint others or think we will lose their respect. We often forget how much we are disappointing ourselves along the way.

Keep in mind that saying no can be exactly what is needed to send the right message that you have limited time. In the tips below, you will see how to communicate your no in a gentle and loving way.

You might disappoint someone initially, but drawing a boundary can bring you the freedom you need so that you can give freely of yourself when you truly want to. And it will often help others have more respect for you and your boundaries, not less.

4. When the Request Comes in, Sit on It

Sometimes, when we are in the moment, we instinctively agree. The request might make sense at first. Or we typically have said yes to this request in the past.

Give yourself a little time to reflect on whether you really have the time or can do the task properly. You may decide the best option is to say no. There is no harm in giving yourself the time to decide.

5. Communicate Your “No” with Transparency and Kindness

When you are ready to tell someone no, communicate your decision clearly. The message can be open and honest[3] to ensure the recipient that your reasons have to do with your limited time.

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How do you say no? 9 Healthy Ways to Say “No”

    Resist the temptation not to respond or communicate all. But do not feel obligated to provide a lengthy account about why you are saying no.

    Clear communication with a short explanation is all that is needed. I have found it useful to tell people that I have many demands and need to be careful with how I allocate my time. I will sometimes say I really appreciate that they came to me and for them to check in again if the opportunity arises another time.

    6. Consider How to Use a Modified No

    If you are under pressure to say yes but want to say no, you may want to consider downgrading a “yes” to a “yes but…” as this will give you an opportunity to condition your agreement to what works best for you.

    Sometimes, the condition can be to do the task, but not in the time frame that was originally requested. Or perhaps you can do part of what has been asked.

    Final Thoughts

    Beginning right now, you can change how you respond to requests for your time. When the request comes in, take yourself off autopilot where you might normally say yes.

    Use the request as a way to draw a healthy boundary around your time. Pay particular attention to when you place certain demands on yourself.

    Try it now. Say no to a friend who continues to take advantage of your goodwill. Or, draw the line with a workaholic colleague and tell them you will complete the project, but not by working all weekend. You’ll find yourself much happier.

    More Tips on How to Say No

    Featured photo credit: Chris Ainsworth via unsplash.com

    Reference

    [1] Science of People: 11 Expert Tips to Stop Being a People Pleaser and Start Doing You
    [2] Anxiety and Depression Association of America: Tips to Get Over Your FOMO, or Fear of Missing Out
    [3] Cooks Hill Counseling: 9 Healthy Ways to Say “No”

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