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4 Things You Can Do To Feel More Positive

4 Things You Can Do To Feel More Positive

An average person can have anywhere from twenty five thousand to fifty thousand thoughts during just one day, and if you’re a pessimist or if you’re having a bad period this seems like a huge amount of darkness, doesn’t it?

Anxiety and stress are not taken seriously enough. People simply continue to give into negativity because they don’t feel concrete consequences, but the harsh truth is that it will negatively affect you in your old days, if not sooner. Another not-so-bright exit after a longer time period when you’re feeling caged in by your thoughts is depression. Dealing with mental disorders is often more challenging than with physical ones.

Here’s a simple test that will allow you to find out whether or not you should do some work on your overall mood. Ask yourself, when was the last time you felt true happiness. If your answer isn’t satisfactory, and I’m sure this is something you can estimate by yourself, you should know that you’re the one responsible for the quality of your life. You should take control.

1. Understand where Negativity Comes From

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    In order to eliminate or cure something, you need to determine its source, because you won’t have much success otherwise – it would be just like trying to fight an enemy you don’t see by randomly swinging your hands in the dark. So – who or what is the source of your anxiety?

    Many people have problems they believe are impossible to tackle in any way, like having a huge debt left by their parents, being completely dissatisfied with a career, or getting over a tough break up. Sure, these are all situations without a clear “bad guy” to point your finger at, but that doesn’t mean you can deny their negative energy.

    Instead of being angry with everyone in your office because you don’t even like being there, you should use your free time to find another job you’ll actually like. Getting over a breakup doesn’t have to be that bad, because you can and should meet new people and use this newfound time to learn more about yourself. And as far as the money goes, everyone has issues with it – you should develop a long-term plan for dealing with yours and stop thinking negatively about it.

    2. Change Your Routine

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      I’m a strong advocate of comfort zones – they allow me to think clearly, I feel safe whilst in one and the chances of feeling anxious are practically non-existent. Although I support and understand people who like theirs, there’s one thing I’d like to put out there – life shouldn’t be predictable 24/7. We are all slaves of our habits and that’s not the way to live your life because it has so much more to offer.

      Not all of us are good at being adventurous and spontaneous; some people simply aren’t cut out for that. However, you can hang out with people who are and allow your spirit to be wild and unpredictable. Routines are comfortable because they provide us with stability, but enjoying life and being open-minded is how you create memories.

      Learn about yourself and experiment by trying new things. It doesn’t have to be about the big stuff, you know – you can try new meals or exotic foods and it doesn’t matter if you don’t like them. Listen to your mind and body,  and allow yourself to appreciate small things because that’s what being alive is all about.

      3.    Failure Isn’t the End

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        Negativity comes in many forms and frustrations are one of the most common shapes of it we encounter on a daily basis. A lot of people out there have real difficulties with failure and even if its smallest forms, like having your plans ruined by the weather.

        One piece of advice from highly successful people seems to be very repetitive when it comes to their advice on staying positive; it doesn’t matter how many times you fall, because your success will be a reflection of how many times you’re able to pick yourself up.

        Therefore, failure isn’t the end, it’s actually a new beginning. In times of trouble and dark thoughts, we often wish for a clean slate and that is exactly what’s in front of us. If you’d just change your point of view, you could change your pessimistic nature and become a cheerful optimist – all it takes is a bit of will.

        Make Yourself Useful

        Mature father and son washing dishes together at kitchen sink

          A certain way to feel good about yourself is that you feel capable and needed. Confidence is one of the first things that goes as negativity claims its reign over your mind, and you should work on increasing your confidence levels because it will definitely make you feel better.

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          I’m sure you have a project or two (or a dozen) that you’ve been planning to conduct for ages now, and this is the perfect time to begin. As far as I’m concerned, doing something around your home should be your choice here, because the chances are you have a bathroom that needs remodeling or a roof that needs fixing, and you should focus your energy on that exactly. Even those small and boring household chores like washing dishes can help you become more focused and relaxed. Even if you’re passive and you lack the willpower right now, it will all change as soon as you start, and once you’re done, you will be aware of the fact you have done something beautiful to make your surroundings even more comfortable.

          Another way to feel good about yourself is by helping a fellow human. It doesn’t have to be anyone in particular. Being there for a member of your family is the most rewarding feeling in the world, but if your loved ones are currently problem-free, you should help out a charity or volunteer in a soup kitchen. Either one you choose, I’m positive you’ll be positive about yourself.

          Being trapped in a particular mindset isn’t an easy thing to deal with or to escape, but you can do it. The bottom line is that no one and nothing should stand in your way of happiness – not even your own mind. Positivity isn’t a goal that’s unreachable. So, change your filter and start looking at the world as if you are seeing it for the very first time.

          Featured photo credit: https://www.pexels.com/u/snowflake/ via pexels.com

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          Aleksandar Ilic

          Blogger, Social Media Butterfly, Guitarist

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          Last Updated on February 15, 2019

          Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

          Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

          In Personal Development-speak, we are always talking about goals, outcomes, success, desires and dreams. In other words, all the stuff we want to do, achieve and create in our world.

          And while it’s important for us to know what we want to achieve (our goal), it’s also important for us to understand why we want to achieve it; the reason behind the goal or some would say, our real goal.

          Why is goal setting important?

          1. Your needs and desire will be fulfilled.

          Sometimes when we explore our “why”, (why we want to achieve a certain thing) we realize that our “what” (our goal) might not actually deliver us the thing (feeling, emotion, internal state) we’re really seeking.

          For example, the person who has a goal to lose weight in the belief that weight loss will bring them happiness, security, fulfillment, attention, popularity and the partner of their dreams. In this instance, their “what” is weight-loss and their “why” is happiness (etc.) and a partner.

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          Six months later, they have lost the weight (achieved their goal) but as is often the case, they’re not happier, not more secure, not more confident, not more fulfilled and in keeping with their miserable state, they have failed to attract their dream partner.

          After all, who wants to be with someone who’s miserable? They achieved their practical goal but still failed to have their needs met.

          So they set a goal to lose another ten pounds. And then another. And maybe just ten more. With the destructive and erroneous belief that if they can get thin enough, they’ll find their own personal nirvana. And we all know how that story ends.

          2. You’ll find out what truly motivates you

          The important thing in the process of constructing our best life is not necessarily what goals we set (what we think we want) but what motivates us towards those goals (what we really want).

          The sooner we begin to explore, identify and understand what motivates us towards certain achievements, acquisitions or outcomes (that is, we begin moving towards greater consciousness and self awareness), the sooner we will make better decisions for our life, set more intelligent (and dare I say, enlightened) goals and experience more fulfilment and less frustration.

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          We all know people who have achieved what they set out to, only to end up in the same place or worse (emotionally, psychologically, sociologically) because what they were chasing wasn’t really what they were needing.

          What we think we want will rarely provide us with what we actually need.

          3. Your state of mind will be a lot healthier

          We all set specific goals to achieve/acquire certain things (a job, a car, a partner, a better body, a bank balance, a title, a victory) because at some level, most of us believe (consciously or not) that the achievement of those goals will bring us what we really seek; joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

          Of course, setting practical, material and financial goals is an intelligent thing to do considering the world we live in and how that world works.

          But setting goals with an expectation that the achievement of certain things in our external, physical world will automatically create an internal state of peace, contentment, joy and total happiness is an unhealthy and unrealistic mindset to inhabit.

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          What you truly want and need

          Sometimes we need to look beyond the obvious (superficial) goals to discover and secure what we really want.

          Sadly, we live in a collective mindset which teaches that the prettiest and the wealthiest are the most successful.

          Some self-help frauds even teach this message. If you’re rich or pretty, you’re happy. If you’re both, you’re very happy. Pretty isn’t what we really want; it’s what we believe pretty will bring us. Same goes with money.

          When we cut through the hype, the jargon and the self-help mumbo jumbo, we all have the same basic goals, desires and needs:

          Joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

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          Nobody needs a mansion or a sport’s car but we all need love.

          Nobody needs massive pecs, six percent body-fat, a face lift or bigger breasts but we all need connection, acceptance and understanding.

          Nobody needs to be famous but we all need peace, calm, balance and happiness.

          The problem is, we live in a culture which teaches that one equals the other. If only we lived in a culture which taught that real success is far more about what’s happening in our internal environment, than our external one.

          It’s a commonly-held belief that we’re all very different and we all have different goals — whether short term or long term goals. But in many ways we’re not, and we don’t; we all want essentially the same things.

          Now all you have to do is see past the fraud and deception and find the right path.

          Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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