Advertising
Advertising

Important Life Lessons To Remind Yourself When Turning 25

Important Life Lessons To Remind Yourself When Turning 25

At 25 you are still young, yet you’re old enough to have picked up some vital life lessons. Here are five things to remember as you pass your quarter-century milestone.

Keep them in mind and you’ll never go far wrong, even when life doesn’t go quite according to plan.

Advertising

1. Time spent on people who don’t appreciate you is time wasted

Life is challenging enough even with the support of positive people, so don’t waste your precious time or energy on those who belittle you, fail to appreciate you, or make you feel bad. Most of us can probably remember a time when we spent weeks, months or even years trying to win over someone who in the end just didn’t deserve us. When you sense that a so-called friend or partner is using you or neglects to show you affection, it’s time to move on. Show yourself some respect and sever ties that damage your emotional health.

2. Identify what you want, and go for it

No-one else can know you better than you can know yourself. By the time you reach your mid-twenties, you will realize that only you can choose the right path for yourself. This applies to the career you pursue, the type of relationships you want, and the skills you develop. It may feel initially scary to take complete responsibility for yourself, but ultimately you will feel completely empowered. It takes courage to look to yourself for guidance, especially if you come from a critical home environment, but doing so is part of being a fully-developed adult. Remember the first time you took a decision that was based solely on your own preferences and values, and how good that felt? Hold onto that memory and use it to bolster your courage when it’s time to chase after your dreams.

Advertising

3. Take no-one for granted

Always remember to value and treasure those who have your back, give you encouragement during the dark times, and offer you their love and help on a regular basis. If you have a good friend you haven’t seen for a while, why not reach out and make contact? Nurture your family relationships too. If you are lucky enough to be on good terms with your parents, remember that they won’t be around forever. Act accordingly by keeping in touch and thanking them for their wisdom and support.

4. You can choose to be happy or miserable. Choose wisely

Sometimes we can’t always control what happens to us, but we can control how we react. As far as anyone knows, we only get one chance to make this journey called life. Think back to a time when you managed to handle bad news or a less-than-desirable outcome with grace and good humor. When life throws you the next curveball (which, of course, it will!), draw on your inner resources and decide to be as happy as possible regardless of what is going on around you.

Advertising

5. Don’t be afraid of your feelings

Whilst it’s preferable to cultivate a positive attitude, sometimes you need to confront your negative feelings and darkest fears. It’s entirely appropriate and natural, for example, to feel sad after a breakup or a sense of disappointment if the job you wanted didn’t work out. At times like these, your feelings can actually be your best friends, because when you carry on under conditions of adversity you prove just how strong you are. This will lay the foundations for a more fearless outlook on life.

Take the above life lessons on board and you won’t just survive your late twenties and beyond, you will thrive! Above all, remember that you are a person of worth and have everything you need to reach your goals and meet life’s challenges head-on.

Advertising

Featured photo credit: Ezra Jeffrey via unsplash.com

More by this author

Jay Hill

Freelance Writer

3 Things To Give Up If You Want To Take Control Of Your Life All You Have to Do to Sleep Better How Social Media Is Making You Feel Bad about Yourself Every Day The Ultimate Guide: How to Become More Creative Day by Day How to Find Love That Lasts: Someone Who Fulfils These 5 Things

Trending in Communication

1 19 Golden Pieces of Relationship Advice From the Experts 2 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes You Might Not Know 3 How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship 4 How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future 5 This Is What Happens When You Move Out Of the Comfort Zone

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

Advertising

The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

Advertising

If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

Advertising

In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

Advertising

It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

More Articles About Effective Communication

Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next