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8 True Feelings Hidden In Every Introvert’s Heart

8 True Feelings Hidden In Every Introvert’s Heart

Being an introvert can sometimes be a struggle in today’s society but it’s a personality trait that is present in many of us. We can have introversion and extroversion to varying degrees, but as a true introvert, we often feel more isolated and misunderstood by those around us.

Introverts love it when people ‘get them’ and accept them for who they are. It is wonderful when a friend tries to get to know you better and connect on a deeper level. Yes, we may be rubbish at meeting up and hanging out, but that doesn’t mean we love you any less. If you want to know how a true introvert really feels or if you’re a self-confessed introvert yourself, then here are 8 thoughts and feelings that you can identify with.

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1. We Hope You Don’t Take Our Social Declines Personally

We often feel guilty about saying no to social invitations and we worry that we may come across as unwilling to socialise. While this is case, it’s never because we dislike people, so we tend to worry that friends will take it personally. The real reason is that we can feel overwhelmed and mentally drained from being around others, which the more extroverted people don’t always understand.

2. It Upsets Us When People Assume We’re Anti-Social

While we interact less, we don’t dislike being around people all the time and it can hurt when some people comment or joke about our anti-social tendencies. Often our lack of reaching out to others is misunderstood and can seem like we generally don’t want to hang out – this isn’t true!

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3. We Can Feel Overwhelming Claustrophobia

Being in a big group of people during social activities can be extremely uncomfortable and overwhelming for us. It’s even worse if we are unfamiliar with the vast majority of people we’re expected to socialise with. We go out of our way to avoid meaningless small talk as it makes us really anxious and awkward. All we want to do is run out of the door just to feel normal again.

4. We Love Meaningful Conversations

Although we don’t always like to partake in conversations (although we are great listeners!) when it comes to deep and meaningful talk, we love getting to know you on a more personal level – whether it’s about your life aspirations, dreams or ideas and perspectives on things. We feel very satisfied and happy to be able to connect with you on a deeper level because we feel it’s genuine. Trivial talk makes us feel disconnected and it feels pointless.

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5. We Appreciate The People Who Accept Our Introversion

It’s so wonderful when people accept our introversion. We feel totally understood and comfortable. We don’t feel judged and can totally be ourselves around them. They get that we aren’t necessarily the ‘let’s hang out at the last minute’ type of person, but that we’re still reliable enough to be a good friend. We are appreciated for our attention to detail in the friendship and our innate qualities that go towards establishing a deep and lasting relationship.

6. We Feel Judged For Staying In Our Comfort Zones

Yes, we do tend to stay in our comfort zones, but that doesn’t mean we don’t try to break free from time to time. It takes a lot for us to reach out to people and organise social get-togethers, but most of the time people don’t understand our struggle. Our comfort zones are our safe places and it’s where we’re most happy. We don’t like to feel judged for that as stepping out of it just isn’t in our nature.

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7. We Sometimes Feel Conflicted About Our Introverted Nature

Sometimes we really hate our introversion. We feel jealous of those who can easily socialise and flit from one party of people to the next, relishing in the conversation. We sometimes feel like we’re missing out and possibly ashamed of our need to take ourselves away from it all. However, having our own independence and freedom from being around others is what gives us the most energy – that’s just how it is. It just happens to be the opposite for a lot of other people.

8. It Hurts When Others Think We’re Just Weird

We can’t help wanting to recharge by ourselves and stay away from socialising too much. That’s why we feel hurt when we’re labelled as strange or weird for not being social butterflies. Everyone in this world is unique and different; nothing or no one is just black and white. With most people in our society having a degree of introversion in them, it makes sense to start accepting people for who they are and how they want to live their lives. We’re not weird for wanting to be by ourselves sometimes and it doesn’t make us any less of a person – in fact, we have the qualities for making deep and wonderful friendships that last a lifetime!

Featured photo credit: snapwiresnaps.tumblr.com via pexels.com

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Jenny Marchal

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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