The Secret to Attracting Anything You Want in Life

The Secret to Attracting Anything You Want in Life

The mindset you need to have to attract anything in life including a great sex life is the same mindset you need to have to be wildly attractive on-camera. The better you get on-camera, the more you’ll be able to attract whatever it is you want in life.

The Science of On-Camera Attraction

Nowadays, no matter what you want, the odds are you have to – at some point – appear on camera to get it. Online dating? You need an attractive dating photo.  Job hunting? A headshot is a must and often a Skype interview is part of the process. Have an online business? You’re going to have to make and appear in videos (because nothing on the internet converts higher than video).  The success you have in either attracting the lover, getting the job or booking the client all starts with being attractive on camera. If there’s one thing you take from this article, it’s that being attractive on-camera has NOTHING to do with physical looks.


When I talk about attraction, I am talking about one’s ability to attract whatever it is they want through photos and videos. This is a consequence of something that has nothing to do with being ‘pretty’ or ‘handsome’ and everything to do with something else.

Have you ever seen a couple fighting in public? If you think back to a time when you have, you’ll probably remember they attract a lot of attention. People cautiously hush their own conversations and shift their attention over to the couple that’s fighting. Why? Is it because they’re being socially inappropriate? Not really. It’s because they’re not self-conscious at all.  They’re highly emotional and completely committed to having an impact on the other person. They don’t care that they’re in public and are absolutely not self-conscious. Because of this, they are very attractive and it’s hard for people to look away. They’ve captured the attention of others and are holding it without even trying.


You can can learn to do the same without have a domestic dispute in public. There are certain things anyone can do on on-camera that will make them instantly more attractive than someone who’s not doing them.

From Self-Conscious to Other-Conscious

The goal is to get you from being self-conscious to other-conscious. Hopping back to the bedroom analogy for a moment, when two completely other-conscious people are in the bedroom, there are some serious fireworks. When you have two self-conscious people in same bedroom scenario, things can be awkward. Awkward would describe 99% of the people that first step in front of my camera – before I share with them what I’m about to share with you.


There are three very simple decisions you need to make before you step in front of any camera.

  1. Who are you talking to? Specifically? The camera is just a passthrough unto whomever you want to reach. It’s an inanimate object that is simply designed to capture what’s there. When we get specific about who we’re talking to, it immediately connects us to something outside of ourselves. Hint: pick a person you feel strongly about. A lover, husband, wife, best friend. Someone who you care deeply for and focus on them.
  2. How do you want to make them feel? Happy? Inspired? Sexy? Loved? Once you decide – then do that. How? You already know how. The way you greet someone you adore is a very different than how you greet someone that you want to back over with your car. It’s called acting. It’s what the best actors in the world do. They focus on who they are talking to and how they want to make them feel. If you’re being photographed, this is all you need. If you’re in a video, since you have to speak, you need to add one more element.
  1. Why. Why are you talking to them? To inspire them? To share your passion about a product you’re selling or to teach them (fill in the blank)? If you’re in business and you know your subject matter, this is all you have to do. Think about who you’re talking to and why. The what will take care of itself. This is what allows people to hop on a video platform like Periscope or Facebook Live and be brilliant without a script.  Oprah Winfrey is a master of this and a large part of the reason behind her $3.2 billion net worth.

That’s the value of The Science of On-Camera Attraction. It’s limitless. The better you get on-camera, the more you’ll be able to attract whatever it is you want in life. All it takes is a little bit of practice.


More Confidence Between the Sheets

How do things in the bedroom go for you when you’re feeling self-conscious? Self-conscious about yourself or your body (or a part of your body)? Do things go well or not so well? How would you describe your experience in the bedroom when you’re feeling self-conscious? Probably, not so good. Or even, not at all.

But what about when you feel totally free? When you’re not watching yourself or self-conscious at all? When you feel able to completely lose control? Things tend to go a little bit better for you, don’t they? In most cases, a lot better. The truth is that the tools you need to have a great orgasm are the same tools you need to be wildly attractive on-camera.

Consider the approach you probably took in your bedroom journey. That first experience you had was probably an awkward one. But you didn’t say: “Well that wasn’t much fun, I’m not going to try that again.” After that initial bit of awkwardness wore off, you probably thought: “I feel this is worth trying again – (and again and again).” If you take that same approach with your on-camera work and focus on who you’re connecting with and how you want to make them feel you’re going to see an instant increase in your own level of attractiveness on-camera. I’d even go so far as to say if you apply this mindset to other areas of your life you’ll see some pretty exciting benefits there as well.

Featured photo credit: lovepankycdn via

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Science Says Silence Is Much More Important To Our Brains Than We Think

Science Says Silence Is Much More Important To Our Brains Than We Think

In 2011, the Finnish Tourist Board ran a campaign that used silence as a marketing ‘product’. They sought to entice people to visit Finland and experience the beauty of this silent land. They released a series of photographs of single figures in the nature and used the slogan “Silence, Please”. A tag line was added by Simon Anholt, an international country branding consultant, “No talking, but action.”

Eva Kiviranta the manager of the social media for said: “We decided, instead of saying that it’s really empty and really quiet and nobody is talking about anything here, let’s embrace it and make it a good thing”.

Finland may be on to something very big. You could be seeing the very beginnings of using silence as a selling point as silence may be becoming more and more attractive. As the world around becomes increasingly loud and cluttered you may find yourself seeking out the reprieve that silent places and silence have to offer. This may be a wise move as studies are showing that silence is much more important to your brains than you might think.

Regenerated brain cells may be just a matter of silence.


     A 2013 study on mice published in the journal Brain, Structure and Function used differed types of noise and silence and monitored the effect the sound and silence had on the brains of the mice.[1] The silence was intended to be the control in the study but what they found was surprising. The scientists discovered that when the mice were exposed to two hours of silence per day they developed new cells in the hippocampus. The hippocampus is a region of the brain associated with memory, emotion and learning.


    The growth of new cells in the brain does not necessarily translate to tangible health benefits. However, in this instance, researcher Imke Kirste says that the cells appeared to become functioning neurons.

    “We saw that silence is really helping the new generated cells to differentiate into neurons, and integrate into the system.”

    In this sense silence can quite literally grow your brain.

    The brain is actively internalizing and evaluating information during silence


      A 2001 study defined a “default mode” of brain function that showed that even when the brain was “resting” it was perpetually active internalizing and evaluating information.


      Follow-up research found that the default mode is also used during the process of self-reflection. In 2013, in Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, Joseph Moran et al. wrote, the brain’s default mode network “is observed most closely during the psychological task of reflecting on one’s personalities and characteristics (self-reflection), rather than during self-recognition, thinking of the self-concept, or thinking about self-esteem, for example.

      “When the brain rests it is able to integrate internal and external information into “a conscious workspace,” said Moran and colleagues.

      When you are not distracted by noise or goal-orientated tasks, there appears to be a quiet time that allows your conscious workspace to process things. During these periods of silence, your brain has the freedom it needs to discover its place in your internal and external world.

      The default mode helps you think about profound things in an imaginative way.

      As Herman Melville once wrote,[2]


      “All profound things and emotions of things are preceded and attended by silence.”

      Silence relieves stress and tension.


        It has been found that noise can have a pronounced physical effect on our brains resulting in elevated levels of stress hormones. The sound waves reach the brain as electrical signals via the ear. The body reacts to these signals even if it is sleeping. It is thought that the amygdalae (located in the temporal lobes of the brain) which is associated with memory formation and emotion is activated and this causes a release of stress hormones. If you live in a consistently noisy environment that you are likely to experience chronically elevated levels of stress hormones.

        A study that was published in 2002 in Psychological Science (Vol. 13, No. 9) examined the effects that the relocation of Munich’s airport had on children’s health and cognition. Gary W. Evans, a professor of human ecology at Cornell University notes that children who are exposed to noise develop a stress response that causes them to ignore the noise. What is of interest is that these children not only ignored harmful stimuli they also ignored stimuli that they should be paying attention to such as speech. 

        “This study is among the strongest, probably the most definitive proof that noise – even at levels that do not produce any hearing damage – causes stress and is harmful to humans,” Evans says.[3]

        Silence seems to have the opposite effect of the brain to noise. While noise may cause stress and tension silence releases tension in the brain and body. A study published in the journal Heart discovered that two minutes of silence can prove to be even more relaxing than listening to “relaxing” music. They based these findings of changes they noticed in blood pressure and blood circulation in the brain.[4]

        Silence replenishes our cognitive resources.


          The effect that noise pollution can have on cognitive task performance has been extensively studied. It has been found that noise harms task performance at work and school. It can also be the cause of decreased motivation and an increase in error making.  The cognitive functions most strongly affected by noise are reading attention, memory and problem solving.

          Studies have also concluded that children exposed to households or classrooms near airplane flight paths, railways or highways have lower reading scores and are slower in their development of cognitive and language skills.

          But it is not all bad news. It is possible for the brain to restore its finite cognitive resources. According to the attention restoration theory when you are in an environment with lower levels of sensory input the brain can ‘recover’ some of its cognitive abilities. In silence the brain is able to let down its sensory guard and restore some of what has been ‘lost’ through excess noise.[5]



          Traveling to Finland may just well be on your list of things to do. There you may find the silence you need to help your brain. Or, if Finland is a bit out of reach for now, you could simply take a quiet walk in a peaceful place in your neighborhood. This might prove to do you and your brain a world of good.

          Featured photo credit: Angelina Litvin via


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