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Date Someone Opposite To You, If You Want To Grow In A Relationship

Date Someone Opposite To You, If You Want To Grow In A Relationship

It is said that opposites attract and in relationships this is especially true. It is natural to be attracted to individuals who are different from us – and somewhat exciting.

Some relationship experts believe that we are naturally drawn to individuals who have strengths that we are missing. They feel that we as humans, all posses an innate quest for completion. And, our attraction to an opposite personality could actually be our subconscious minds driving us towards becoming a more complete individual, by causing us to face the areas in life where we are weaker.

Learning how to truly love, appreciate and embrace each others’ differences is a major key to having a relationship that is long lasting and fulfilling while simultaneously experiencing personal growth. Because when two opposites function as a couple, they become a more well-rounded unit.

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How to make a relationship work when you are opposites:

Just as being opposites drew you to each other, it can also tear a relationship apart. Learning how to make a relationship work in spite of major differences is challenging however, the rewards can be so much more fruitful than if you and your partner were exactly alike.

Think of it this way; if both of you are exactly the same, one of you is un-necessary.

Opposites balance each other

If one half of the couple is loud, opinionated and a social butterfly and the other half is quiet, soft spoken and reserved–they can both learn from each other. They can not only help each other tone it down and amp it up, but they also can help each other understand how others may be affected by their behavior.

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If one person is a free spirit and lacks routine and the other is a planner and calculates every move, both parties would definitely benefit from adopting some of the habits of the other. Or if one is a spender and worry-free when it comes to financial responsibility and the other is extremely frugal and watches every penny–the chances of that couple having a life time of great experiences and a tidy retirement nest egg –are greatly increased.

We all need balance in our lives and having a partner that is your opposite automatically adds the missing piece of the equation.

Being with your polar opposite exposes you to a different point of view

Whether or not you agree with another person’s perspective is not nearly as important as being exposed to it. A lot of people feel that opposing–or just different–viewpoints automatically results in conflict, which is not entirely true. Being exposed to and considering a subject from a different angle doesn’t mean you have to agree or that you are weak minded and gullible. It does demonstrate your willingness to engage, understand, learn and grow.

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Seeing things through the eyes of another allows you to become more empathetic and relate to the world in a different way. It expands your mind, awakens a different set of senses and unleashes in you the power to make even better decisions.

Being with someone who is different hones your ability to compromise

Learning to compromise is not only key in how to make a relationship work but also in navigating life. Traditionally, when we think of compromise we think that we must give up something,  the other also person has to give up something and we both only get half of what we want. But truly effective compromise creates “win-win” situations. If you can learn to see your partners diverse needs, likes and desires as an opportunity for you both to be enriched, empowered and satisfied, you will thrive in the area of creating the “win-win.”

Compromise is driven by communication. When seeking to compromise one usually “gives in” to the other. But being with someone who is very different than you are affords you more opportunities to hone your communication skills and develop the creativity and ingenuity it takes to produce scenarios where everyone wins.  And that is not just good for your relationship–it’s just good, period.

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Learning how to make a relationship work with a person who is dissimilar is challenging. Challenges build character and fortitude. Don’t shy away from dating someone because they appear to be too different from you. You may be passing up an opportunity to experience true love, develop a deep appreciation for divergent viewpoints and the opportunity to become your best self.

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Denise Hill

Speech Writer/Senior Editor

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Last Updated on October 9, 2018

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

Who has never gone through some ups and downs in the life? But some people can feel better in a quicker way than others because they’ve found their own remedies to heal the bad feelings.

If you haven’t found yours, these ways will help you instantly feel better and ditch that negative self talk when you’re feeling bad about yourself:

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  1. Listen to the songs you loved when you were in high school or university, this will recall you of the old good times.
  2. Write something. Write down how you feel as a way to express your thoughts if you don’t feel like talking to anyone.
  3. Draw something. Draw anything you want because no one’s going to judge your drawing skills.
  4. Read the postcards or letters your friends or family sent you before, remind yourself there are people who always remember you.
  5. Silently think of a day or moment which you truly enjoyed and try to recapture that very first feeling. Was it the day of your graduation? The moment you traveled with your loved one?
  6. Take out your photo albums and go over your childhood photos.
  7. Cry when you feel like doing so. There’s nothing wrong with crying; cry out all your fear and stress and just face the truth after crying.
  8. Sing loudly like no one can hear you. Do you know that in Japan, people always sing karaoke to relieve stress?
  9. Cook a nice meal for yourself or for your family.
  10. Read your previous diary entries and look at your great memories.
  11. Dress up nicely to feel happier.
  12. Don’t stay in your bed! Get your laptop or a book and sit in a coffee place.
  13. Take a walk outside and feel the fresh air.
  14. Sweat yourself! Go jogging or play some sports.
  15. Pick up the musical instrument you used to play a lot and start to play it.
  16. Tidy up your desk or wardrobe, you’ll feel good that you’re being productive and actually doing something.
  17. Watch some funny videos, sure you can find a lot of them on Youtube.
  18. Eat something you like, be it a chocolate cake, or an ice-cream. Just please yourself with the flavour you like.
  19. Re-read your favorite book and write down the sentences or passages that you love.
  20. Watch a new movie, there must be a movie which you’ve always interested in but had no time to watch it.
  21. Do something nice that no one will notice, say picking up a rubbish in the street and throw it to a trash bin.
  22. Call your best friend and just talk whatever you want! Human beings are social animals after all, connecting with people close to you will make you feel better.
  23. Do voluntary work and help people in need, you’ll feel happy and satisfied.
  24. Get drunk with your close friends at home – a safe place for you to get drunk and get crazy. Let loose and have fun with your very close friends.
  25. Write an email or a note to a friend who you care about.
  26. Get out of your routine life and meet new friends. Get out of your comfort zone! Meeting new people can give you new inspirations in life.
  27. Look into the mirror and smile. Act like today’s already a wonderful day. How we act affects how we feel. It’s difficult to go on feeling sad if you’re trying to smile!

Remember:

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It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.  — Epictetus

If you want to feel better, change what you’re doing because obviously what you’re doing doesn’t make you happy!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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