Advertising
Advertising

3 Reasons You Should Release the Weight of Failure When You Have No Job

3 Reasons You Should Release the Weight of Failure When You Have No Job

One of the best things you can do when you feel like a failure is challenge your perception.

When you have no job, feeling like a failure isn’t uncommon. The problem comes in when you give too much thought to your “lack of success” and failure becomes your identity. When this happens, failure weighs you down. The weight becomes so heavy, you find it hard to do what you can to better your situation and look ahead.

If you’ve been carrying the weight of failure while you’re unemployed, then here are 3 reasons you should release it.

1. The Weight Of Failure Makes You View It Negatively

You think failure is who you are when you carry this heavy weight. As a result, you go through a cycle of negativity. This negativity is destructive. Why? Because you forget an important truth: failure shows you tried.

You planned and executed your plan. Determined a university. Declared a major. Went to class for years. Graduated. Looked forward to getting a job in your field but haven’t yet accomplished this goal.

On the other hand, you might’ve gotten a job after college but now find yourself out of a job for some reason. You’ve been applying for jobs, but what’s been happening? So far, you’ve failed to land a job offer.

Advertising

But guess what matters more? You took action along the way and continue to do so. You didn’t let thoughts of failure stop you from embarking on your journey to professionalism. And still don’t despite rejections and let downs.

It’s a disappointing experience, no doubt. However, it shows how courageous you are. All you can do is give the job search your best efforts. From there, you learn, better yourself, and start over — with the wisdom acquired.

2. The Weight Of Failure Makes You Forget You’re On Your Own Journey

Unemployment not only brings feelings of failure, but it also brings the comparison temptation.

How often do you compare yourself to others (online or offline) and feel discouraged? How often do you question how others are securing job offers and you’re not? How often do you wonder why others are advancing professionally but you’re failing?

If you answered “often,” then you’ve most likely fallen into the comparison trap. This isn’t a healthy activity because this type of comparison increases the weight of failure. It leaves you feeling worse than others.

In an article on the Coloradoan, Dr. Lloyd Thomas, a Licensed Psychologist, states:

Advertising

“. . . As adults, when we compare ourselves to others, it is usually to evaluate ourselves as “worse than” or “better than” or “equal to” other people. When we measure ourselves against others, it causes us psychological harm.”

So, instead of engaging in unhealthy comparison behavior — and forgetting you’re on your own journey — consider the following tips:

  • Adjust Your Thoughts. Pay attention to your thoughts, take them captive and replace them with truth. This is an important tip because your thoughts affect your actions. If you believe you’ll never make money (again), then you’ll never explore every legitimate opportunity available.
  • Accept Your Life And Career Journey (Including Your Failure). There might be similarities, but everyone has their own unique journeys in life. Don’t focus on the journeys of others. Instead, focus on your own and move forward courageously. Keep believing you can still succeed — or succeed again — at the right time.
  • Be Grateful For Your Achievements To Date. Take time regularly and do the following: remind yourself about your accomplishments. Think about the compliments you received in previous roles and jobs. Think about the people you’ve helped along the way. When you do this, you’ll be grateful for what you’ve done without a focus on what you haven’t done yet.

3. The Weight Of Failure Makes You Forget (And Reject The Possibility Of) Other Successful Outcomes

Failing hurts. Rejections sting in the job hunting process. But please don’t forget your other accomplishments.

Sure, you haven’t yet met your expectation of quickly landing a job offer. But remember, you’ve been successful in other things along the way: entering and graduating from high school, college, and for some, graduate school. You’ve acquired knowledge and valuable skills along the way. You have natural talents, which allows you to help yourself and others.

Please don’t take these things for granted because you’ve failed to find a job.

It’s easier to focus on the negatives when you’re dealing with unemployment challenges. I know. Yet, the better choice is to focus on your past and present successes with gratitude.

Advertising

You might’ve noticed I also said “present successes.” Here’s why: you can accomplish things while you’re unemployed. You know this, right?

In my case, if employers hadn’t rejected me, then I wouldn’t have started blogging. I wouldn’t have learned content writing, online marketing, and other skills.

I took the stings of rejection personally, but I didn’t let them stop my quest for professional knowledge and growth.

So to you: don’t let unemployment stop you from remembering past accomplishments. Additionally, don’t let unemployment leave you blinded to your accomplishments now. If you haven’t yet accomplished something because your failure has you down, please know failure isn’t the end unless you allow it to be. So, do what you can each day to move forward. Professionally, this might include:

  • Determining your strengths and the ways they’ll benefit an employer
  • Focusing on what you want to achieve in your career
  • Tailoring your cover letter and resume (for a job you want) to better your chance of interviewing
  • Trying something new (learning and applying a new skill, for example)

These steps are small, but this isn’t a problem. What matters is you’re moving forward with action and hope.

Professor Johannes Haushofer’s CV of Failures proves you can succeed after failing. Refuse to let your failure define your future. Boost your resilience and keep it moving.

Advertising

Conclusion

If you’ve been feeling like a failure while you’re looking for a job, then please believe this: you’re not a failure. In the words of Zig Ziglar,

“. . . failure is an event . . .”

It won’t negatively impact your career without your allowance. So, though it won’t be easy, make an effort to let go of this weight. Consider its benefits. Use it as a learning opportunity. Better yourself, do what you can to move on from your “lack of success,” and look onward.

Take things one day (and step) at a time, with your head held up high.

Featured photo credit: Milada Vigerova via unsplash.com

More by this author

3 Reasons You Should Release the Weight of Failure When You Have No Job organize your job search 7 Productive Ways to Organize Your Job Search Activities Daily Effective Job Seekers 9 Things Effective Job Seekers Don’t Do In Their Job Searches

Trending in Career Advice

1 10 Essential Career Change Questions To Ask Yourself This Year 2 10 Job Search Tools Every Jobseekers Need To Know About 3 10 Websites To Learn Something New In 30 Minutes A Day 4 50 Great People To Follow On LinkedIn, No Matter Your Industry 5 If You Have This Key Behavior, You’ll Be More Successful Than 90% Of People

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 14, 2019

The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

Regardless of whether you hold an entry-level administration role or regularly travel to the ends of the Earth as a hot-shot senior executive, you can still find yourself harboring an emptiness… a feeling that something is missing. A popular assumption that experiencing job satisfaction and a successful career should be underpinned by a well-rounded suite of tangible benefits, no longer holds true for many of us.

We’d never deny health care benefits, appropriate and fair remuneration, bonuses and travel perks in a job package. However, even if served to us on a silver platter, those features can only satiate us to a certain point.

You might wonder what governs entrepreneurs and start-up business owners to quit their lucrative jobs, essentially look the gift horse in the mouth and kiss such benefits goodbye! There can be an irresistible pull to mastermind a business with products and/or services that serve the greater good of community wider than that constituting their daily existence.

Even with research showing entrepreneurship to pose greater threats to their mental and physical health, this unique breed of individuals choose to go against the grain in chasing their dreams of being their own boss. Why? Why would anyone risk this type of career suicide?

Whether you’re an employee, have recently taken the leap to being a business owner or been in business for a while, the commonality is a congenital condition we all share as human beings; to feel a sense of purpose, value and contribution to our community. Despite it being harder to find this for ourselves in today’s world, these approaches will help you achieve ultimate satisfaction through the twists, turns and joyrides that are essential features of shaping a successful career.

1. Search for Opportunities That Feed Your Passion, Not Temporary Excitement

Even though well-intended, the ‘feel good now’ compass that career coaches and consultants often recommend you use to create career satisfaction can actually do you more harm than good. Excitement is transient. It doesn’t last. Passion is the compass you need.

Passion and excitement are two different things. The resounding career legacy that still draws you to turn up on the job regardless of the sunshine or storm that awaits you…that’s passion. It’s like a mental and/or emotional itch you can’t shrug off. Staying attuned to that calling will breed success for you sooner or later. Patience is key.

You’re also likely to have more than one key passion. Beware of getting caught in the notion you have to find your one true purpose. In fact, run immediately from any coach who tells you there is only one. There isn’t.

Advertising

Your passion is a journey that can take multiple forms so forget thinking there is the single dream job out there that will give you satisfaction in every way you can imagine. It simply doesn’t exist.

Consider embracing different roles and projects to help you fuel your passion or fuel your pursuits in finding it. Job satisfaction and your career success will be all the more sweeter from a wider range of enriching experiences.

2. Don’t Position Job and Career Satisfaction Assessments as Pivotal Guides to Your Success

Despite their popular use for vocational guidance, assessment tools such as Gallup’s Clifton Strengths and the Myers Briggs Type Indicator have come under fire[1] as being limited to the amount of true value and direction they can offer partakers.[2] These and many other guidance assessment tools (e.g. VIA Character Strengths , DISC ) are self-report questionnaires that don’t have normative population data against which to compare your results.

Simply remember these tools help you develop a stronger sense of what you identify as strengths and weaknesses within yourself, not in comparison with other people. They will still add insight around what sorts of career opportunities, tasks and projects are going to light your fire, what ones are going to extinguish it and what will prod and keep the coals steadily smoldering.

3. Be Clear on Your Personal Values, Ethics and Principles and Choose Relationships That Support You Honoring Them

Teamwork, collaboration, open communication and trust are commonplace for any flourishing work environment. However, whether or not your personal values can be honored in your work can make or break your job satisfaction.

How committed do you want to be to an organization that expects an average of 10 unpaid overtime hours every week under the guise of ‘reasonable overtime’? Are you willing to accept their construing this expectation as ‘strong commitment’ at the expense of your partner and children waiting at home for you? What are your boundaries concerning when you clock on to their time and when you clock off to yours?

Being very in tune with what your personal values, principles and ethics are will bid you well in the job satisfaction stakes. Spending time to reflect on experiences and working relationships you’ve had – the good, the bad and the ugly – will help you make well-informed searches and grounded decisions that will propel your career success.

Finding and nurturing relationships with associates and colleagues who share similar values doesn’t just make your day-to-day pursuits more enjoyable. You become fortunate to work with like-minded people who will support, understand and appreciate you like a second family.

Advertising

Being able to honor your personal values in your work means you will still be able to sleep at night when you have to tread where others fear to, and make extremely difficult decisions others would never ever dream of having to make as you forge success in your career.

4. Be Clear on Your Own Definition of What Having a Successful Career Means for You

It’s tempting to get caught up in the ideals and projections of success expressed by those we love, admire and respect. Underneath, we all want on some level to belong to a successful club of some sort.

With research reporting how much money we feel we need to be truly happy,[3] many of us try to subscribe to the notion that having the car of our dreams or taking a European holiday annually will not bring us happiness. The truth, however, for many of us is these tangible rewards are congratulatory reminders of our persistent efforts to chase our career pursuits.

If those are things you aspire to, don’t let anyone steal your desire and want to feel deserving of these things, that those are some parameters by which you define your career success.

Despite consistently being the top revenue earner for two years running, you may not wish to become the sales manager. You may not wish to step out into running your own business even though you consistently excel as an employee, delighting clients and repeatedly receiving glowing testimonials.

Your definition of career success might be enjoying the predictability of a regular workplace routine. You get to leave – without feeling guilty – at the same time each day, love the people you work with and get to spend a good, uninterrupted amount of work-stress free quality time with your family. That picture is also blissful job satisfaction and complete career success.

5. Identify the Sorts of Challenges and Problems You Want to Learn to Overcome

Standard advice you might receive from a career coach might be to look for opportunities where you get to capitalize on exercising your strengths and career-related activities you enjoy.

However, to become a success at anything involves improvement. To excel at anything often involves stepping outside boundaries and comfort zones where others wouldn’t. This means dedicating focus and attention to things you’re not so good at and things you don’t like.

Advertising

Here’s where working with a coach can be particularly helpful. Map out the experiences that were unsavory in your working history. Were there challenges you opted out of, projects you failed at or toxic relationships that blasted your sense of purpose and self-worth into oblivion? It’s within these experiences that you might just find the most valuable lessons and guiding lights for your trajectory to achieve greater job satisfaction.

If your natural leadership style is to be a collaborator, finding opportunities that require you to apply a more dictatorial style might be needed. Discussing a secondment or short-term project where you get to develop and test your skills can be a step further in earning contention to lead a larger project down the track.

With several of the company’s boldest personality types penciled to roll out the operation, you’ll not only develop skills that earn your right to throw your hat in the ring; those key players have an opportunity to see your competence. You can then work on building relationships with those stakeholders before you need to hit the ground running should you win the lead.

Greater job satisfaction comes with planning and choosing the lessons and opportunities you want to learn, not desperately flailing, floundering and hoping for the best.

6. Keep Reviewing Your Goal Posts and Be Amenable to Change

The word ‘career’ is indicative of a longer-term pathway of change, growth and development. The journey is dynamic.

You will accumulate new skills and let those you no longer need, become rusty. Your intrigue will be stimulated by new experiences, knowledge and people you meet. Your thinking will continue to expand, not shrink. As a result, your goalposts are likely to change.

A major part of enjoying a successful career is not just setting goals effectively, but regularly reviewing and readjusting them where necessary. However, moving the posts or the target still needs to take place by applying the same processes by which you originally created them. The strength of your emotional connection to those revised goals needs to be the same, if not stronger.

By asking yourself the following questions, you can assure your developmental and growth trajectory is still on course:

Advertising

  • Would working toward these goals still allow me to honor my personal values, principles and ethics at the same capacity if not greater?
  • Do the activities I need to undertake to meet these goals honor my highest priorities?
  • Does this feel right for me and those who are nearest and dearest to me?
  • Is this aligned with my passion?
  • Is chasing this goal a right step for me to take now or is this a detour or distraction which could delay my greater plan?

Each of your career goals should have different review periods. Whatever you do, stick to the review schedule you set. It will not only keep you focused but help you see your progress (or lack thereof) and allow you to timely re-chart your course before you get too far down the track. You don’t want to waste time haphazardly heading in the wrong direction.

7. Be Prepared to Let Go

It can be unfathomable to us as to why others risk leaping into the unknown when everything truly appears fine and dandy in the career realm. The company provided stability, recognition, financial success, interesting projects and the promise of a promotion…what was wrong? Why now jump sideways to run a café or train in another field altogether?

Nothing may have been wrong at all. It was all going right. It was just the end of a chapter. Perhaps the yearning for the next step is actually taking a different trajectory entirely. You may want to simply experience a different rhythm. Perhaps it’s time to pursue a different passion.

If you have leaped from employee-land to freelancing or have made the reverse-jump (or you know someone who has), you will have quickly grown a different appreciation for pros and cons each work lifestyle brings. Working for yourself can bring the greater realization of your creativity, whether or not it can be monetized to earn you a living.

When your customers are buying you or a product you designed and fashioned, there is a direct level of appreciation and gratitude that can elevate your confidence in the way you have never experienced as an employee, regardless of your rank.

Similarly, there are times where we need to recognize our business ventures were adventures, not long-term life-changing empires. There are times we need to recognize that time is what provides the clearest limitation of how long we persist for in such pursuits.

We have to recognize the absence of enough financial, mental, emotional and physical breadcrumbs that tells us we’re no longer meant to push in that direction. At least, not for the present time.

The Bottom Line

Above all, keep the momentum. As long as you remain committed to pursuing work opportunities that allow you to honor your highest priorities, the truth of who you are and what you stand for, achieving ultimate job satisfaction and a successful career will never be too far away.

More Resources to Help Advance Your Career

Featured photo credit: Csaba Balazs via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next