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8 Signs It’s Time To Break Up With A Friend (Even If You Feel Deeply Sorry)

8 Signs It’s Time To Break Up With A Friend (Even If You Feel Deeply Sorry)

Deciding whether or not to break up with a friend can feel like a roller-coaster ride of emotions. Yet when considered logically, it could clearly be the healthiest choice.

As we go through life, we naturally make new acquaintances and form friendships with a select few. While we put great importance on carefully choosing who we let in, we should remember to cut ties with those who start to drag us down.

It’s really nothing to feel ashamed of. Naturally, people change and you may find yourselves in totally different places. Don’t assume that friends must always be forever, at times it simply can’t be fixed or reconciled. Sometimes you’ve got to consider your own long-term happiness and keep your social circle lean.

It can be a painful experience a friendship changes for the worst, but there’s no need to prolong the hurt. If your relationship possesses any of these eight indicators, it may be time gracefully part ways!

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1. Your Relationship Has Become One-Sided

If your relationship has fallen off-balance and shows no sign of returning, it’s likely they don’t value you as you do them. Constantly having to pursue a friend without much return is terrible, it can even harm your self-worth.

If you’ve let your friend know and it still hasn’t made a difference, quit wasting your energy and let them go!

2. Manipulating and Controlling Behavior Runs Rampant

Stop to reflect on your relationship for a second, have you lost sight of being the real you? If you feel you’re no longer being authentic, relationship toxicity will be building up. Consider whether you or your friend manipulating each other, and why?

Healthy friendships are about sharing the depth of our character, not exploiting each other. If this is the case, it may be time to reassess the whole relationship.

3. They Are Dragging You Down With Them

Are you starting to feel guilty by association? If your friend has a questionable character or behavior, you may want to consider how it reflects back upon you. If they regularly exhibit bullying behavior, others may start to see you in the same light. Or worse yet, it may start to bring out the bully in you!

You’ve got to be careful with who you align or associate yourself with, you may pick up their qualities and mannerisms too.

4. There’s Spiteful Jealous and Furious Competition Between You

Your friendship is well on truly on the rocks if you find yourselves in bouts of jealousy and ruthless one-upping. The constant need to prove yourselves to each other is exhausting rather than comforting.

Remember, friendships should be empowering and encouraging not antagonizing!

5. The Best Thing Between You is History

Sometimes, we find ourselves holding onto lifelong friends for little more than the rich history. But what’s the point of holding on if the only positive part is a recollection of a childhood friendship. You’re now living in the present, where you, your friend and life may be radically different.

The last thing you want to do is hold onto stale relationships purely out of historic honor!

6. They No Longer Contribute Anything Positive to Your Life

Sometimes we’ve simply got to stand up for ourselves. If someone does nothing but bring us down, we must respect ourselves enough to let them go. Friends should be a natural extension of your life, as you should be to theirs.

Whether it’s cheering each other up, spurring each other on or even just having a laugh together. Everyone contributes something different, but make sure it’s positive!

7. The Negative Situations Over-Shadow the Positive Ones

If the bad has begun to outweigh the good, it’s likely your friendship is beginning to sour. A friendship should be mutually beneficial and make both of you happy, not provoke emotional situations or altercations.

While an occasional fallout is quite common, having consistent problems is a strong indicator of incompatibility.

8. They Are Chipping Away At Your Self-Esteem

True friends provide a crucial support system for each other, especially within the associated stresses of modern living. Whenever either one has problems, troubles or doubts, their buddies will rally to provide moral support. This single most important aspect of friendships is raising each other’s self-esteem.

Breaking up with a friend is never easy, but if they are working against your self-confidence and causing you to doubt yourself, it’s definitely time to jump ship!

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Last Updated on August 16, 2018

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

The ability to take risks by stepping outside your comfort zone is the primary way by which we grow. But we are often afraid to take that first step.

In truth, comfort zones are not really about comfort, they are about fear. Break the chains of fear to get outside. Once you do, you will learn to enjoy the process of taking risks and growing in the process.

Here are 10 ways to help you step out of your comfort zone and get closer to success:

1. Become aware of what’s outside of your comfort zone

What are the things that you believe are worth doing but are afraid of doing yourself because of the potential for disappointment or failure?

Draw a circle and write those things down outside the circle. This process will not only allow you to clearly identify your discomforts, but your comforts. Write identified comforts inside the circle.

2. Become clear about what you are aiming to overcome

Take the list of discomforts and go deeper. Remember, the primary emotion you are trying to overcome is fear.

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How does this fear apply uniquely to each situation? Be very specific.

Are you afraid of walking up to people and introducing yourself in social situations? Why? Is it because you are insecure about the sound of your voice? Are you insecure about your looks?

Or, are you afraid of being ignored?

3. Get comfortable with discomfort

One way to get outside of your comfort zone is to literally expand it. Make it a goal to avoid running away from discomfort.

Let’s stay with the theme of meeting people in social settings. If you start feeling a little panicked when talking to someone you’ve just met, try to stay with it a little longer than you normally would before retreating to comfort. If you stay long enough and practice often enough, it will start to become less uncomfortable.

4. See failure as a teacher

Many of us are so afraid of failure that we would rather do nothing than take a shot at our dreams.

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Begin to treat failure as a teacher. What did you learn from the experience? How can you take that lesson to your next adventure to increase your chance of success?

Many highly successful people failed plenty of times before they succeeded. Here’re some examples:

10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

5. Take baby steps

Don’t try to jump outside your comfort zone, you will likely become overwhelmed and jump right back in.

Take small steps toward the fear you are trying to overcome. If you want to do public speaking, start by taking every opportunity to speak to small groups of people. You can even practice with family and friends.

Take a look at this article on how you can start taking baby steps:

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The Number One Secret to Life Success: Baby Steps

6. Hang out with risk takers

There is no substitute for this step. If you want to become better at something, you must start hanging out with the people who are doing what you want to do and start emulating them. (Here’re 8 Reasons Why Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful).

Almost inevitably, their influence will start have an effect on your behavior.

7. Be honest with yourself when you are trying to make excuses

Don’t say “Oh, I just don’t have the time for this right now.” Instead, be honest and say “I am afraid to do this.”

Don’t make excuses, just be honest. You will be in a better place to confront what is truly bothering you and increase your chance of moving forward.

8. Identify how stepping out will benefit you

What will the ability to engage in public speaking do for your personal and professional growth? Keep these potential benefits in mind as motivations to push through fear.

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9. Don’t take yourself too seriously

Learn to laugh at yourself when you make mistakes. Risk taking will inevitably involve failure and setbacks that will sometimes make you look foolish to others. Be happy to roll with the punches when others poke fun.

If you aren’t convinced yet, check out these 6 Reasons Not to Take Life So Seriously.

10. Focus on the fun

Enjoy the process of stepping outside your safe boundaries. Enjoy the fun of discovering things about yourself that you may not have been aware of previously.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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