The influence we have over our children can have a far bigger impact than we think. That is why the way we speak, act and the wisdom we pass on to them will imprint onto their lives in far greater ways than we can imagine. We have so much power to enrich their lives with the positive things we’ve learnt from our own lives and to allow these timeless truths to transcend into their future.
Successful parenting isn’t all about helping your child to be the best academically or ridding them of all their adversities, it’s about playing a crucial role in the personal growth by means of gentle direction no matter where their life may take them. It’s providing them with wisdom that they can apply to all areas of their life and give them a positive basis for life decisions and outlooks.
1. Your Perception Of The World Is What You Make It
How we see the world is all made up of what we’ve been told and exposed to from a very early age. As we get older these beliefs shape the way we see ourselves and the world around us. It’s sad that if we’ve been brought up in a negative environment, then we are more likely to grow up with similar fears, negative feelings and emotions as that is how we’ve been taught to see the world.
As a parent, it’s so important to not only bring up a child in a positive and loving environment, but to not teach them your own limiting beliefs and negative perceptions. Realise that the things you fear will be picked up by your children and passed on creating their own perceptions through yours. By recognising these you can readjust what you teach to your child and choose to allow their minds to be open and curious to let them gain their own conclusions of the world.
2. Pain Is An Essential Part Of Life
Our natural instinct is to shield and protect our children from pain but by doing this we don’t teach them that pain is inevitable in life. By protecting them we are denying them the chance to process and deal with painful situations from a young age when they are learning how to deal with different emotions.
If painful situations arise such as the death of a family member, a pet or an argument with a friend at school, it’s important to teach them that pain helps you to grow – we need to embrace the hard times in our life to deal with it in a way that allows us to learn and move on. Be a constant reassurance that everything happens for a reason and for a higher good.
3. Find Your Own Path In Life
It’s easy to pass on our beliefs to others – it’s hard not to. However, be aware that what you think may not be what other’s think – when a child asks a question it’s important not to immediately answer with your own thoughts and ideas. Instead, make sure you keep the question open and ask the child what they think. You want your child to be their own person and form their own opinions and beliefs based on their knowledge of the world. Remember they are a unique person outside of you and what resonates with you may not resonate with them. Encourage them to question things and not take what they hear as the truth.
4. Live In The Present Moment
Life is full of many distractions and especially with today’s technology. That’s why it’s important to allow children to be aware of the present moment. Happiness can’t be found in the past or the future but in the here and now – the more we connect with the moment we’re living in now, the more we connect with our higher being and create appreciation and calmness. Mediation is a wonderful way to teach this but the act of being mindful of the things we do will help cultivate a more positive mind.
5. Everything Is Temporary
With that in mind, it’s important to know everything in this world is temporary. Holding on the past only sits inside of us and cultivates if we don’t let it go. Life is full of ups and downs – living with these and going with the flow will mean a much less bumpy journey through life. We are able to adapt more easily to change and resist living in the past.
6. Take Responsibility For Your Own Happiness
The first few years of life can be like living in a bubble where you learn to connect with the things around you and understand your place in the world. This time is usually a period where a child is innocently very self-centred because there is so much attention put upon them. It’s only when they start school and realise they aren’t the only one getting attention. This is when blame towards others can be cultivated because they struggle to find their place, to be heard by others and feel things are other people’s fault.
Teaching a child that they, and only they, are responsible for their own happiness is so important – it will stop the victim-mentality they can easily pick up (and what many of us as adults have done) and stop them from pushing the responsibility of their happiness onto things outside of themselves.
7. Fear Is An Illusion
People may want to fight against this one because we are so hellbent on holding on to the fears we have cultivated over the years. But in truth, fears are not real. Fear is just an emotion that comes from a preformed idea or belief – fear is just an illusion. Unfortunately, there are many dangers in the world but the fear we generate around them is not directly proportionate to the dangers themselves. Danger does not have to equal fear but this is what children pick up on. Fearful thoughts attract fearful situations so it’s important to learn about danger and be aware but not to fear it.
8. Your Only Limitation Is Your Mind
We often say ‘the sky is the limit’ which implies that somewhere up there, a limit exists. Everyday we impose limitations on ourselves through false negative beliefs, ideas, and thoughts of self-worth. However, we are only limited by our thinking and what we think is true or false – learning to acknowledge that our limiting beliefs aren’t true is an important lesson to pass on to our children. Instilling this at a young age will allow a child to believe they can accomplish anything and reduce the amount of limited thinking in the first place.
The way in which we teach our children the ways of the world is paramount to creating a happy, well-rounded child. Successful parenting means giving children the best possible start in life by cultivating a positive mind and a real awareness of the world they live in. We are all growing and learning as we walk through life so, in turn, remember never to dismiss what our children can teach us in return!
Featured photo credit: Josh Willink via pexels.com