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5 Struggles Overly-Nice People Would Understand So Well

5 Struggles Overly-Nice People Would Understand So Well

Being overly nice can be a great thing and a terrible thing.

Although most people admire nice people for their forgiving and loving attitudes, other people will try to take advantage of their kind heartedness.

And it isn’t just other people; nice people can also make their own lives difficult. They always give people the benefit of the doubt, even when they don’t deserve it, and they often put the happiness of others before their own happiness.

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Here are 5 struggles that overly nice people will understand well.

1. Overly Nice People Forgive People Who Don’t Deserve It

One of the worst parts of being overly nice is giving someone the benefit of the doubt when they don’t deserve it. Overly nice people struggle to hold grudges, so they often forgive someone who then immediately upsets them again. This leaves most nice people feeling hurt and betrayed, and it can make it difficult to trust others.

If you have someone in your life who has betrayed your forgiveness, consider cutting them out of your life. It may be difficult, but then your niceness can be spent on more deserving people.

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2. People Walk All Over Nice People

Lots of selfish people are happy to take advantage of nice people, from co-workers to friends to family members. Nice people are happy to do favors for others, such as lending them money or giving them a lift to work. However, these favors are rarely returned, which hurts the nice person as they realize that they are being taken advantage of.

If you are overly nice and you can relate to this, practice sticking up for yourself in a peaceful manner when you are alone. Simply offer an explanation, such as “Sorry I can’t give you a lift today, I’m really busy. You could get the bus?”

3. Nice People Struggle To Say ‘No’ To Others

Nice people are people pleasers, so they always say ‘yes’ to everything – even when they don’t want to. They dislike saying ‘no’ to others as it can feel mean, and they want to be a dependable person.

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If you can relate to this, remember that you can’t please everyone, and that trying to do so is futile. However, you can make yourself happy – and does it make you happy to do favors for others when it means cancelling your own plans?

4. Nice People Feel Guilty When They Put Themselves First

Overly nice people often feel guilty for putting themselves first. They feel bad if they don’t reply to texts and Facebook messages straight away, and they never cancel on plans – even if they really, really want to.

If you feel guilty when you say no to others, offer a compromise with your ‘no’. Instead of saying ‘No’, say ‘Sorry, I can’t reply properly now – I’m at work! I can ring you later today for a proper chat?” This will take away any feelings of guilt, as you are still giving people the chance to speak to you and see you – just on your own terms, instead of theirs.

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5. People Don’t Take Nice People Seriously Enough

Nice people are optimistic and friendly, and they go out of their way to lighten difficult situations with other people. However, this means that other people don’t take you seriously, as they think that you are naïve and unaware of the world around you.

This is very belittling to nice people, as they aren’t oblivious of the negativity around them – they just choose not to focus on it. If you feel like someone isn’t taking you seriously, sit them down for a chat or cut them out of your life. You don’t need to accept that negativity in your life!

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Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

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Last Updated on April 9, 2020

How to Think Positive Thoughts When Feeling Negative

How to Think Positive Thoughts When Feeling Negative

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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Learn How to Surround Yourself With Positive People.

2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

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4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

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6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

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8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

More Tips for Staying Positive

Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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