Advertising
Advertising

How To Avoid A Fresh-Graduate Financial Crisis

How To Avoid A Fresh-Graduate Financial Crisis

Graduation is a point in life where we all feel accomplished. We leap in joy, throwing our hats high and falling to the ground gracefully in our gowns. We are excited about life, work, and our future. We look toward our college sweetheart, now soulmate, and make our promises for a bright future together. Our parents pat our backs, wishing us all the luck for our future.

However, eventually life hits us as we walk through every back door for a job interview. If we are lucky, we land an internship position or a dream job in a few tries, but sometimes luck is on the other side and we are forced to scale back and re-think our choices. Student loans and other debts begin to pile up while we wait for the opportunities to knock.

The question is: how do we avoid financial meltdown before it’s too late?

Advertising

Here are a few tips and tricks I’ve compiled to help you with this problem.

1. Keep In Mind That Your First Job Isn’t Your Safety Net.

If you’ve noticed, many of us make the same mistakes repeatedly. We assume the first job we land with mediocre pay becomes our safety net. We assume that the very first job is the perfect reflection of our identity and we stop exploring. Nelson Mandela once said that being comfortable is the most dangerous feeling humans can have.

This statement becomes prominent, especially among fresh graduates, as we over-commit ourselves. We put in our first instalment for a car, we purchase a brand new wardrobe, get a new apartment lease, pile up on credit cards, and gather many other unnecessary debts.

Advertising

Initially, we enjoy over-indulging ourselves. However, as months go by, our expenses increase and we find it hard to keep up with it. We end up in a loop of debt and payments among other fresh graduates. Eventually, we end up playing catch-up with bills that restrict our freedom to explore other opportunities.

If you’re fresh out of university, always keep in mind that it’s better to save and invest than to purchase material items. Credit cards and car instalments just add up to more debt. Keeping it smart and simple is the best way to ensure your financial security. Opportunities are everywhere, so never assume your first job is your safety net. Instead, give yourself the freedom to explore.

2. Love Isn’t Going To Pay The Bills.

Love is a beautiful feeling shared between two people, and after several years we often feel the need to commit to one another for better or for worse. Unfortunately, many make the fatal mistake of proposing as soon as they’re out of university, with the excuse being time and circumstance. These couples often fail to see that a key part in creating a family or committing to marital life is financial stability.

Advertising

As the initial honeymoon period settles, many realize the combined responsibilities of bills, accommodations, food, and many other expenses have begun to take their toll.

You should always keep in mind that love alone isn’t going to pay the bills, but it definitely can wait. If the person is right for you, then encourage them on their path toward self-development, achieve great accomplishments together, and once you’re confident enough in your financial stability, you can tie the knot. This ensures that you and your family can avoid any unforeseen financial uproar later in your marriage .

3. Realize That This Is The Age To Take Risks.

Being fresh out of university is the best time to take risks. However, fear and hesitation can lead many to avoid taking that leap of faith. We stay in jobs that frustrate us, spending hours trailing back and forth on our monitors while looking for new opportunities, but never making any moves. We fail to realize that this is the right time to take some risks.

Advertising

As a fresh graduate, you aren’t bound by unavoidable responsibilities and circumstances — you’ve got nothing to lose. You can explore the journey of trial and error and learn from your mistakes. You can take the risk of investing and growing your own legacy. These tiny risks allow you to expand your horizon.

Eventually, these risks give you the freedom to ensure your own financial stability, which will possibly give you the freedom to retire and enjoy the comfort of perfect financial stability for the rest of your life.

In a nutshell, these tips could be your savior in navigating this new realm of independence. Take the time to try to relate and understand how you can avoid financial meltdown.

Featured photo credit: Juan Ramos via images.unsplash.com

More by this author

How to Have the Best Spring With Your Pets 5 Ways to Enjoy Festivals With Pets 5 Best Islands To Definitely Visit In 2017 How Canada Is A Perfect Place For Holidays How To Keep Your Pets Warm In Winter.

Trending in 20-Something

1 How To Go Through College And Stay Sane 2 The Battle Of The Voices In My Head 3 How to Have the Best Spring With Your Pets 4 5 Effective Ways to Increase your Instagram Followers 5 5 Ways to Enjoy Festivals With Pets

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

Advertising

It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

Advertising

Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

Advertising

1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

Advertising

6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

Read Next