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7 Reasons Your 30s Will Be More Awesome Than Your 20s

7 Reasons Your 30s Will Be More Awesome Than Your 20s

It has been said that 20 is the new 30. And while that sounds great to some people, I am grateful to have made it through my 20s — with my sanity in tact.

Don’t get me wrong, your 20s are great. You are young, tender, beautiful and filled with hope. You are open to and welcome new experiences–even bad ones. You feel invincible, carefree and grown up. And you get to do things your way.

And while your 20s are a blast, being “wide-eyed and bushy tailed” gets old–and a bit hazardous.

Your 30’s are here and it’s going to be awesome! Here’s why:

1.  You become truly beautiful

Women in their 20s are young and hot and even though youth is starting to gradually fade, women in their 30s began to fully embody true beauty.

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Once you hit 30 you have a firm grasp that beauty is more than just skin deep.

The eyes of a woman in her 30s are no longer wide and innocent. They now have a depth brought on by experience and the wisdom that only comes through age. Your dress is still sexy but it has moved from overly revealing to demur, classy and a bit more seductive.

There is a bit more mystery to women in their 30s than the 20 somethings–and intrigue is hot.

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https://www.pexels.com/photo/girl-fashion-hands-rings-24155/

    2.  Women in their 30s have developed a strong sense of self

    When you hit 30 you know who you are–or at least have a better idea. By the time you reach 30, you have experienced enough to understand who you are as a person. You are in tune with what you can tolerate and what you will not. You’ve lost some of the urge to follow the “it” crowd and you do what suits you best. You are less afraid of being different and your need to “fit in” has definitely dissipated. The phrase “do you–Boo,” has become your guiding philosophy.

    3.  Women in their 30s are more focused and goal oriented

    When I hit 30, I was in full stride in my career and relationship. I had a better sense of what I wanted in all aspects of life and my decisions were tailored to reach my goals. I knew I wanted to live a life free from debt and financial worry and I wanted to retire while I was still young enough to look decent in a bathing suit. I structured my life, family and finances to meet these goals.

    In your 20s having clear focus and being goal oriented is a bit more difficult because you feel young and being a responsible adult still isn’t high on your list of priorities. When you hit 30, there is definitely a shift in your thinking. It’s like you can actually hear the clock ticking and you know it’s time to get things done.

    4.  Women in their 30s are better in relationships

    An amazing thing happened when I hit 30–I fully realized life is not all about me. I now better understand balance and that translates into healthier relationships. You become a better daughter, friend, spouse or girlfriend and mother.

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    By 30 you don’t have it all figured out but you do have a firm grasp on what you don’t want in a relationship. You are able to look past those sexy abs and full head of hair in search for an individual that is compatible with you in all aspects of life.

    https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-girl-nails-sexy-17725/

      5. Women in their 30s are more content and settled

      Everything is no longer the end of the world. You have learned to pick your battles, your friends and the drama you allow into your life. You are content to just “Netflix and chill,” in lieu of bar hopping and partying every weekend. You understand that routine is a normal part of your existence and have accepted that a lot of life is of getting up every morning, following your routine and the doing it all over again the next day. AND that thought no longer provokes a panic attack.

      6.  Women in their 30s have wisdom cultivated by experience

      By the time I reached 30, I had seen a lot and done a lot. I was married, had finished college, was working in the career field of my choice, and had spent time traveling abroad. I experienced multiple highs and lows through each of those journeys and by the time I hit 30, I was no longer making the same mistakes and my thought patterns and approach to life had changed.

      Experiences stick with you and each experience alters you just a bit. Thirty is the time you settle into who you are and become more aware of the world around you. You have learned some things–and though you don’t know everything–you know enough not to ever wish you were 21 again.

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      7.  Women in their 30s no longer live with wreck- less abandon but take calculated risk

      In your 30s you have more to lose and the memory of past pains help you to be a bit more selective in your risk taking. You’ve gone from careless risks to being cautious and calculating. You are smarter, wiser and understand that time is precious.

      The choice of whether or not to quit your job and run away with Raul to become a unicorn farmer is so much easier now that you are 30. You already know how that story ends.

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      Denise Hill

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      1 Why Am I So Sad? 9 Possible Causes You Shouldn’t Ignore 2 How to Give Constructive Feedback in the Workplace 3 10 Things That Even You Can Do to Change the World 4 5 Ways to Get Out of a Bad Mood (Backed by Psychology) 5 How a Gratitude Journal Can Drastically Change Your Life

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      Last Updated on December 4, 2020

      How to Give Constructive Feedback in the Workplace

      How to Give Constructive Feedback in the Workplace

      We all crave constructive feedback. We want to know not just what we’re doing well but also what we could be doing better.

      However, giving and getting constructive feedback isn’t just some feel-good exercise. In the workplace, it’s part and parcel of how companies grow.

      Let’s take a closer look.

      Why Constructive Feedback Is Critical

      A culture of feedback benefits individuals on a team and the team itself. Constructive feedback has the following effects:

      Builds Workers’ Skills

      Think about the last time you made a mistake. Did you come away from it feeling attacked—a key marker of destructive feedback—or did you feel like you learned something new?

      Every time a team member learns something, they become more valuable to the business. The range of tasks they can tackle increases. Over time, they make fewer mistakes, require less supervision, and become more willing to ask for help.

      Boosts Employee Loyalty

      Constructive feedback is a two-way street. Employees want to receive it, but they also want the feedback they give to be taken seriously.

      If employees see their constructive feedback ignored, they may take it to mean they aren’t a valued part of the team. Nine in ten employees say they’d be more likely to stick with a company that takes and acts on their feedback.[1]

      Strengthens Team Bonds

      Without trust, teams cannot function. Constructive feedback builds trust because it shows that the giver of the feedback cares about the success of the recipient.

      However, for constructive feedback to work its magic, both sides have to assume good intentions. Those giving the feedback must genuinely want to help, and those getting it has to assume that the goal is to build them up rather than to tear them down.

      Promotes Mentorship

      There’s nothing wrong with a single round of constructive feedback. But when it really makes a difference is when it’s repeated—continuous, constructive feedback is the bread and butter of mentorship.

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      Be the change you want to see on your team. Give constructive feedback often and authentically, and others will naturally start to see you as a mentor.

      Clearly, constructive feedback is something most teams could use more of. But how do you actually give it?

      How to Give Constructive Feedback

      Giving constructive feedback is tricky. Get it wrong, and your message might fall on deaf ears. Get it really wrong, and you could sow distrust or create tension across the entire team.

      Here are ways to give constructive feedback properly:

      1. Listen First

      Often, what you perceive as a mistake is a decision someone made for a good reason. Listening is the key to effective communication.

      Seek to understand: how did the other person arrive at her choice or action?

      You could say:

      • “Help me understand your thought process.”
      • “What led you to take that step?”
      • “What’s your perspective?”

      2. Lead With a Compliment

      In school, you might have heard it called the “sandwich method”: Before (and ideally, after) giving difficult feedback, share a compliment. That signals to the recipient that you value their work.

      You could say:

      • “Great design. Can we see it with a different font?”
      • “Good thinking. What if we tried this?”

      3. Address the Wider Team

      Sometimes, constructive feedback is best given indirectly. If your comment could benefit others on the team, or if the person whom you’re really speaking to might take it the wrong way, try communicating your feedback in a group setting.

      You could say:

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      • “Let’s think through this together.”
      • “I want everyone to see . . .”

      4. Ask How You Can Help

      When you’re on a team, you’re all in it together. When a mistake happens, you have to realize that everyone—not just the person who made it—has a role in fixing it. Give constructive feedback in a way that recognizes this dynamic.

      You could say:

      • “What can I do to support you?”
      • “How can I make your life easier?
      • “Is there something I could do better?”

      5. Give Examples

      To be useful, constructive feedback needs to be concrete. Illustrate your advice by pointing to an ideal.

      What should the end result look like? Who has the process down pat?

      You could say:

      • “I wanted to show you . . .”
      • “This is what I’d like yours to look like.”
      • “This is a perfect example.”
      • “My ideal is . . .”

      6. Be Empathetic

      Even when there’s trust in a team, mistakes can be embarrassing. Lessons can be hard to swallow. Constructive feedback is more likely to be taken to heart when it’s accompanied by empathy.

      You could say:

      • “I know it’s hard to hear.”
      • “I understand.”
      • “I’m sorry.”

      7. Smile

      Management consultancies like Credera teach that communication is a combination of the content, delivery, and presentation.[2] When giving constructive feedback, make sure your body language is as positive as your message. Your smile is one of your best tools for getting constructive feedback to connect.

      8. Be Grateful

      When you’re frustrated about a mistake, it can be tough to see the silver lining. But you don’t have to look that hard. Every constructive feedback session is a chance for the team to get better and grow closer.

      You could say:

      • “I’m glad you brought this up.”
      • “We all learned an important lesson.”
      • “I love improving as a team.”

      9. Avoid Accusations

      Giving tough feedback without losing your cool is one of the toughest parts of working with others. Great leaders and project managers get upset at the mistake, not the person who made it.[3]

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      You could say:

      • “We all make mistakes.”
      • “I know you did your best.”
      • “I don’t hold it against you.”

      10. Take Responsibility

      More often than not, mistakes are made because of miscommunications Recognize your own role in them.

      Could you have been clearer in your directions? Did you set the other person up for success?

      You could say:

      • “I should have . . .”
      • “Next time, I’ll . . .”

      11. Time it Right

      Constructive feedback shouldn’t catch people off guard. Don’t give it while everyone is packing up to leave work. Don’t interrupt a good lunch conversation.

      If in doubt, ask the person to whom you’re giving feedback to schedule the session themselves. Encourage them to choose a time when they’ll be able to focus on the conversation rather than their next task.

      12. Use Their Name

      When you hear your name, your ears naturally perk up. Use that when giving constructive feedback. Just remember that constructive feedback should be personalized, not personal.

      You could say:

      • “Bob, I wanted to chat through . . .”
      • “Does that make sense, Jesse?”

      13. Suggest, Don’t Order

      When you give constructive feedback, it’s important not to be adversarial. The very act of giving feedback recognizes that the person who made the mistake had a choice—and when the situation comes up again, they’ll be able to choose differently.

      You could say:

      • “Next time, I suggest . . .”
      • “Try it this way.”
      • “Are you on board with that?”

      14. Be Brief

      Even when given empathetically, constructive feedback can be uncomfortable to receive. Get your message across, make sure there are no hard feelings, and move on.

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      One exception? If the feedback isn’t understood, make clear that you have plenty of time for questions. Rushing through what’s clearly an open conversation is disrespectful and discouraging.

      15. Follow Up

      Not all lessons are learned immediately. After giving a member of your team constructive feedback, follow it up with an email. Make sure you’re just as respectful and helpful in your written feedback as you are on your verbal communication.

      You could say:

      • “I wanted to recap . . .”
      • “Thanks for chatting with me about . . .”
      • “Did that make sense?”

      16. Expect Improvement

      Although you should always deliver constructive feedback in a supportive manner, you should also expect to see it implemented. If it’s a long-term issue, set milestones.

      By what date would you like to see what sort of improvement? How will you measure that improvement?

      You could say:

      • “I’d like to see you . . .”
      • “Let’s check back in after . . .”
      • “I’m expecting you to . . .”
      • “Let’s make a dent in that by . . .”

      17. Give Second Chances

      Giving feedback, no matter how constructive, is a waste of time if you don’t provide an opportunity to implement it. Don’t set up a “gotcha” moment, but do tap the recipient of your feedback next time a similar task comes up.

      You could say:

      • “I know you’ll rock it next time.”
      • “I’d love to see you try again.”
      • “Let’s give it another go.”

      Final Thoughts

      Constructive feedback is not an easy nut to crack. If you don’t give it well, then maybe it’s time to get some. Never be afraid to ask.

      More on Constructive Feedback

      Featured photo credit: Christina @ wocintechchat.com via unsplash.com

      Reference

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