Advertising
Advertising

8 Pieces Of Advice That Are Useless To People With Depression

8 Pieces Of Advice That Are Useless To People With Depression

Depression is often seen in completely different lights by those who have suffered from it and those that have no. If you’re fortunate enough not to have encountered depression in your life, it can be difficult to help despite your best efforts. The advice lovingly provide are often ineffective due to the misunderstandings they contain.

If you really wish to help people with depression, you must develop a deeper understanding of the condition. This is the only way you can help guide your loved ones out of the darknesses. Avoid using these common pieces of advice which unknowingly cause more harm than good.

8 Sayings That Don’t Actually Help People With Depression

1. “Maybe you need to let yourself cry it out, you’ll feel much better after”

Depression is not simply a one-off moment of sadness, it’s a persistent feeling of blue as if life was viewing through a filter. For this reason, letting it out by crying is not going to provide any form of release.

In many cases, suffers have neither the impulse nor the ability to cry.

Advertising

2. “You need to get up and get out more. Once you’ve had a good day you’ll be back to normal”

walker-1208261_1280

    If you really want to help people with depression, you must realize it takes a long time to treat. Going out and having a good day may provide temporary relief, but it is far from being a cure-all. Many people wrongly assume having a good day means they are cured, but that’s not how it works.

    As you can’t bring yourself to face these situations, you find yourself cancelling plans and leaving them hanging. They don’t always know how they can help you and rifts can grow between you. Depression can put a tremendous strain on friendships, it’s certainly not something suffers want to willing to introduce it into the relationship.

    3. “Stop getting caught up with negative thoughts, focus on the positive things around you”

    Sadly, it’s never quite as simple as this. Your biology is difficult, if not impossible to simply re-wire. Your core desires and ambitions may be pushing you one way but your brain chemistry seems to battle against you.

    Advertising

    Having depression can distort your perception of reality dramatically. Those negative thoughts woven by you will in actual fact be your reality.  It can be so dominating that even when observing your life it can be hard to find pride in past achievements. An outsider’s perspective on the situation will be starkly different to what’s experienced by the one who is depressed.

    4. “Don’t worry, you always have us. Sharing more about how you feel will help”

    woman-1031196_1280

      While sometimes it can help to share our problems, depressed people are often reluctant to dump this weight upon others. They are very sensitive about the issue, especially since others are unlikely to truly understand how they feel. The last thing they want is someone to think they are being whiny or dramatizing how bad they feel inside.

      They are very conscious of the fact most people don’t know how to react to how they are feeling. Not everyone understands well enough not to take these feelings personally.

      Advertising

      5. “Get on with your daily routine and you’ll start to feeling better before you know it”

      When you are depressed, even getting through the daily routine can be a slow, uneasy grind. Simply getting out of bed, preparing yourself for the day, eating and even sleeping becomes a grinding chore. Moreover, it’s not something that is going to dissolve depression by any means.

      It becomes a terrible conundrum, you feel completely isolated, yet too depressed to socialize. Coming out and telling your friends why can almost be as hard as dealing with depression itself. Even with treatment, medication, exercise, sleep and a healthy diet, depression is not always simply gone for good.

      6. “If only you could try a little harder to be positive, I know you would feel much better”

      sea-758165_1280

        Unfortunately, the road to recovery from depression can be arduous and is not without pitfalls. Suffers of depression often ensure a bumpy ride, when they begin to feel ok they can be thrown back to square one the next day.

        Advertising

        It’s an entirely frustrating experience, simply telling them to try harder to be positive does not demonstrate a good understanding of their struggles.

        7. “Setting yourself goals and focusing on achieving them will help you out of this rut”

        Depressed people don’t taste the same sweet taste of satisfaction from their achievements as we do. The dull tone of depression does not allow them to restore their happiness and energy level after success.

        In actual fact, depression suffers may even be the highest performers in their fields. Success does not always alleviate their depression.

        8. “Once you’ve regained control of your emotions you’ll be free from depression”

        The tricky thing about depression is it becomes both an emotional and a physical battle. When you think you’ve regained control of your emotions, physical problems such as aches, fatigue, loss of appetite can flare them up again.

        If you want to help people with depression, you need to understand they are constantly fighting battles on two fronts!

        More by this author

        How to Make Learning Fun for Adults 3 Home Exercises To Fix Your Rounded Shoulders In One Month When You Drink Water On An Empty Stomach After Waking Up, These 8 Amazing Things Will Happen 20 Rules to Live by for Those Who Want to Lose 10 Pounds in 3 Weeks 7 Reasons You Should Thank The Second Language You Learned

        Trending in Health

        1 Why Am I Exhausted? The Real Causes and How to Fix It Forever 2 The Top Fad Diets That Are Actually Worth the Hype 3 20 Easy and Healthy Breakfast Recipes for Rush Mornings 4 20 Health Affirmations to Stay Fit Physically and Mentally 5 5 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress Effectively

        Read Next

        Advertising
        Advertising
        Advertising

        Last Updated on May 28, 2020

        How to Overcome Boredom

        How to Overcome Boredom

        Have you ever been bored? Restless? Fidgety? In need of some inspiration?

        I have a theory on boredom. I believe that the rate of boredom has increased alongside the pace of technology.

        If you think about it, technology has provided us with mobile phones, laptops, Ipads, device after device – all to ultimately fix one problem: boredom.

        What is Boredom?

        We have become a global nation that feeds on entertainment. We associate ‘living’ with ‘doing’. People now do not know how to sit still, and we feel guilty when we are not doing anything. Today, inactivity has become the ultimate sin.

        You might not realize it, but boredom stimulates a form of anxiety and stress. It evokes an emotional state that creates frustration and feeds procrastination.

        Advertising

        It’s a desire to be ‘doing something’ or to be ‘entertained’ – it’s a desire for sensory stimulation. What it boils down to is a lack of focus.

        If you think about those times when you’re bored, it’s usually because you did not know what to do. So, indecision also plays a big part.

        When we are focused on what’s important to us and what we want to achieve, it’s pretty hard to be bored. So, one answer to boredom is to become focused on what you want.

        Sometimes It’s Good to Be Bored

        If boredom is a desire for sensory stimulation – then what’s the opposite of that? To be content with no stimulation – in other words – to enjoy stillness.

        Sometimes, it’s not boredom itself that causes the frustration but the resistance to doing nothing.

        Advertising

        Think about it. What would happen if you were to ‘let go’ of the desire to be entertained? You wouldn’t be bored anymore, and you will feel more relaxed!

        In my experience, it’s often the most obvious, simplistic solutions that are the most powerful in life. So, when you’re bored, the easiest way to combat this is to enjoy it.

        It may sound weird but think of ‘boredom’ as a form of ‘relaxation’. It’s a break from the constant stimulation that 21st-century living provides – constant TVs, mobile phones, radios, internet, emails, phone calls, etc.

        Who knows, maybe ‘boredom’ is actually good for us?

        Next time you’re ‘feeling bored’ instead of feeding the frustration by frantically looking for something to do, maybe you can sit back, relax, and savor the feeling of having nothing to do.

        Advertising

        In this article, I’ll share with you my 3-step strategy on how to overcome boredom.

        3-Step Strategy to Overcome Boredom

        1. Get Focused

        Instead of chasing sensory stimulation at random, focus on what’s really important to you. Focusing on something important helps prevent boredom because it forces you to utilize your time productively.

        You should ask yourself: what would make good use of your time? What could you be doing that would contribute to your major goals in life?

        Here are a few ideas:

        • Spend some time in quiet contemplation considering what’s important to you.
        • Start that creative project you’ve been talking about for the last few weeks.
        • Brainstorm: think of some ideas for new innovative products or businesses.

        2. Kill Procrastination

        Boredom is useful in some ways because it gives you the energy and time to do things. It is only a problem if you let it. But if you use it to motivate yourself to be productive, then you can more easily overcome boredom.

        Advertising

        So, the next time you’re bored, why not put this good energy to use by ticking off those things that you have been meaning to get done but have been too busy to finish? This also presents a great time for you to clear your to-do list.

        Here are some ideas:

        • Do some exercise.
        • Read a book.
        • Learn something new.
        • Call a friend.
        • Get creative (draw, paint, sculpt, create music, write).
        • Do a spring cleaning.
        • Wash the car.
        • Renovate the house.
        • Re-arrange the furniture.
        • Write your shopping list.
        • Water the plants.
        • Walk the dog.
        • Sort out your mail & email.
        • De-clutter (clear out that wardrobe).

        3. Enjoy Boredom

        If none of the above solutions work, then you can try a different approach. Don’t give in to boredom and instead choose to enjoy it. This doesn’t mean allowing yourself to waste your time being bored. Instead, think of it as your time to relax and re-energize, which will help you be more productive the next time you work.

        Contrary to popular belief, we don’t need to be constantly doing things to be productive. In fact, research has shown that people are more productive when they take periods of rest to recharge.[1] Taking breaks once in a while helps boost your performance and can help make you feel more motivated.

        So, take some time to relax. You never know, you might even like it.

        Final Thoughts

        Learning how to overcome boredom may be difficult at the beginning, but it can be easier if you make use of some techniques. You can start with my 3-step strategy on how to overcome boredom and work your way from there. So, ready your mind and make use of these tips, and you will be overcoming boredom in no time.

        More Tips on Overcoming Boredom

        Featured photo credit: Johnny Cohen via unsplash.com

        Reference

        Read Next