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Introverts Are Born To Connect More Deeply With Others, Here’s Why

Introverts Are Born To Connect More Deeply With Others, Here’s Why

“Extroverts sparkle, introverts glow. If you appreciate your own quiet glow, other people will see it too.” – Sophia Dembling

Introverted people are often thought of as quiet and shy – perhaps not the best option for a party or even a date. But look closer. What do you see? A hundred beautiful things about a human being that perhaps just doesn’t interact with the world the same way that a more extroverted person would.

Introverts are not necessarily shy at all, they just do not feed off social energy the way that other people do, the way that extroverts do. They do not need to be the center of attention, it does nothing for them. This is not to say, however, that introverts are not great for a talk, or to spend time with. They are. And here is why.

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Introverts Prefer Deep Conversation

Introverts are great conversationalists, if you get them one-on-one. And when you do, it is a beautiful thing. They have the ability to take time with conversations, and although they can often be a little slow to warm up to you, it is worth the wait. Introverts are not big fans of small talk, they like to speak less but say more. Because of this they have the ability to make deeper and more profound connections with those they choose to interact with in this way. It isn’t just fickle banter. Introverts have a lot of good stuff to say.

They Have An Intriguing Depth

Whether it is the inner glow or the inner knowing, introverts have a mystique surrounding them that is compelling to many other human beings. We wonder what is going on inside that mind. We want to know.
In fact, introverts are more likely to be chased by love interests than they are to do the chasing. Though often described as distant, introverts are far from being invisible.

Says Sophia Dembling, author of Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After: “I assumed nobody noticed introverted me, but years and years later, when I reunited with people from high school (thank you Internet), I learned that actually, many boys had noticed me.”

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Introverts have different brains to the rest, which is part of their capacity for deeper connections. Their energy levels are invigorated by time alone, unlike extroverts whose energy grows within social environments. Introverts react with overstimulation to dopamine, the neurotransmitter in the brain, whereas extroverts are excited by it. Introverts feel good when they turn inward instead of outward, and reflect on more meaningful ideas.

They Have Successful Relationships With Extroverts And Introverts Alike

Unlike extroverts, introverts can interact with all kinds of personalities – they just aren’t comfortable being all kinds of personalities. Introverts have the amazing gift of being able to appeal to both sides. With other introverts they can be one-on-one, understand each other and have quality time being comfortable within themselves.

Dembling states: “Either combination can work, depending on whether an introvert is looking for someone who will bring a social life to them, or someone who will hunker down at home with them. Both desires are perfectly valid and both combinations can work.”

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With an extrovert it is more like yin and yang, with the introvert complimenting the extrovert by being two different halves of a whole. Both types of relationships can be successful.

Introverts Are Great Listeners

Introverts have a number of excellent skills when it comes to listening to others. These include attention, noticing detail, thoughtfulness, the ability to ask questions, think about and analyze problems in detail. They are incredible partners in this way, and such attributes are closely linked with loyalty and dedication. These are intrinsically linked to how introverts also have more profound connections with others. Caution should be applied in certain situations, however, to make sure that introverts do not get lost in always being the listening ear for people who like to just talk continuously. Balance is paramount.

They Are More Peaceful In The Face Of Aggression

With care not to be passive aggressive, introverts are less likely to be rowdy and start fights when it comes to confrontation. They are more likely to talk things through and offer a more balanced and proactive solution to problems. This prevents emotions running too high and nasty things being thrown around in the heat of the moment, which can be highly salvaging for a strong connection with another. Abstaining from hurtful and irrational behavior is something we could definitely learn from introverts.

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Featured photo credit: Pablo via pablo.buffer.com

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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