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I Don’t Need You To Do Big Things For Me, I Just Want The Little Things

I Don’t Need You To Do Big Things For Me, I Just Want The Little Things

Love isn’t just about finding the right person and embarking on a beautiful star-crossed adventure. Love isn’t about fancy dates at snazzy restaurants or expensive honeymoons on private islands. Love isn’t just about eternal promises, blissful kisses, and endless nights of happiness. Sometimes, love is all about the little things.

All meaningful relationships are built on mutual empathy. It is not the big things that you do for me that matters, but those little moments of love, thoughtfulness, and affection that make a relationship fulfilling. You might shower me with diamond necklaces and luxury clothes, but if you forget to wish me on a happy birthday, chances are that the marriage is going downhill.

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Whether it is sharing the last chocolate left in the fridge or preparing hot coffee when I need an instant recharge, it is these little acts of kindness that ultimately make my day.

It doesn’t matter if the restaurant is famous or not, your full mental presence is what makes me satisfied

Kissing at Sunset

    Picture credit: tmarsee530

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    I don’t need expensive presents, I like the gifts that fit my needs

    Angela & Alex-30

      Picture credit: johnhope14

      I don’t need you to stay with me all the time, I love the moments when you tell me you are missing me

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        I don’t need you to get rich, I just love your smile and confidence

        Couple at Manhattanhenge

          Picture credit: WarmSleepy

          It doesn’t matter if you’re a communication expert, I just appreciate when you listen patiently without interrupting

          Misha and Matt

            Picture credit: Joi

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            The strength of a relationship lies in the small ways we show our love every day. Whether it’s kissing my cheek before leaving for work, preparing a scented hot bath after a tiring day, or simply texting an ‘I love you’ when I’m all alone, it is the little things that make life and love beautiful.

            Featured photo credit: danielmviero.com via imcreator.com

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            Last Updated on June 24, 2019

            Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

            Why Social Media Might Be Causing Depression

            A study [1] published in Depression and Anxiety found that social media users are more likely to be depressed. This was just one of the huge number of studies linking social media and depression[2] . But why exactly do platforms like Facebook and Instagram make people so unhappy? Well, we don’t know yet for sure, but there are some explanations.

            Social Media Could Lead to Depression

            Depression is a serious medical condition that affects how you think, feel, and behave. Social media may lead to depression in predisposed individuals or make existing symptoms of depression[3] worse explains[4] the study above’s senior author Dr. Brian Primack. So, the problem may not be in social media per se, but how we use it.

            Signs You’re Suffering From “Social Media Depression”

            If you feel like social media is having a negative impact on your mood, then you may be suffering from “social media depression.” Look for symptoms like:

            • low self-esteem,

            • negative self-talk,

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            • a low mood,

            • irritability,

            • a lack of interest in activities once enjoyed,

            • and social withdrawal.

            If you’ve had these symptoms for more than two weeks and if this is how you feel most of the time, then you are likely depressed. Although “social media depression “is not a term recognized in the medical setting, social media depression seems to be a real phenomenon affecting around 50% of social media users. As explained in a review study[5] published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, if a person has a certain predisposition to depression and other mental disorders, social media use may only worsen their mental health.

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            Social Media Could Crush Self-Esteem

            We know that social media and depression are in some way linked, but why is this so? Well, according to Igor Pantic, MD, Ph.D.[6], social media use skews your perception about other people’s lives and traits. To explain this further, most people like to portray an idealized image of their lives, personal traits, and appearance on sites like Facebook and Instagram. If you confuse this idealized image with reality, you may be under the false impression that everyone is better than you which can crush your self-esteem and lead to depression. This is especially true for teens and young adults who are more likely to compare themselves to others. If you already suffer from low self-esteem, the illusion that everyone has it better off than you will just make you feel worse.

            Causing Social Isolation and Other Negative Emotions

            Another commonly cited reason for the negative impact of social media on mental health is its link with social isolation. Depressed people are more likely to isolate themselves socially and chose only to interact indirectly through social media platforms. But communication online tends to be superficial and is lacking when compared to real-life interaction explains Panic. What this means is not that social media leads to isolation but the other way around, possibly explaining why we find so many depressed persons on these sites.

            Lastly, social media use may generate negative emotions in you like envy, jealousy, dislike, loneliness, and many others and this may worsen your depressive symptoms.

            Why We Need to Take This Seriously

            Both depression and social media use are on the rise according to epidemiological studies. Since each one has an impact on the other, we have to start thinking of healthier ways to use social media. Teens and young adults are especially vulnerable to the negative impact of social media on mental health.

            Advice on Social Media Use

            Although these findings did not provide any cause-effect explanation regarding Facebook and depression[7], they still do prove that social media use may not be a good way to handle depression. For this reason, the leading authors of these studies gave some suggestions as to how clinicians and people can make use of such findings.

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            One suggestion is that clinicians should ask patients about their social media habits. Then they can advise them on how to change their outlook on social media use or even suggest limiting their time spent on social media.

            Some social media users may also exhibit addictive behavior; they may spend too much time due to compulsive urges. Any compulsive behavior is bound to lead to feelings of guilt which can worsen depressive symptoms.

            Having Unhealthy Relationship with Social Media

            If you feel like your relationship with social media is unhealthy, then consider the advice on healthy social media use provided by psychology experts from Links Psychology[8]:

            Avoid negative social comparison – always keep in mind that how people portray themselves and their lives on social media is not a realistic picture, but rather an idealized one. Also, avoid comparing yourself to others because this behavior can lead to negative self-talk.

            Remember that social media is not a replacement for real life – Social media is great for staying in touch and having fun, but it should never replace real-world interactions.

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            Avoid releasing personal information – For your safety and privacy, make sure to be careful with what you post online.

            Report users who bully and harass you – It’s easy to be a bully in the anonymous and distant world of social media. Don’t take such offense personally and report those who abuse social media to harass others.

            The bits of advice listed above can help you establish a healthy relationship with social media. Always keep these things in mind to avoid losing an objective perspective of what social media is and how it is different from real life. If you are currently suffering from depression, talk to your doctor about what is bothering you so that you can get the treatment you need to get better. Tell your doctor about your social media use and see if they could give you some advice on this topic.

            Reference

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