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The Time You Wake Up At Night Reveals Your Emotional Conditions (And Health Issues Too)

The Time You Wake Up At Night Reveals Your Emotional Conditions (And Health Issues Too)

If waking up in the middle of the night has become the norm, it’s advisable not to ignore it as it may spell trouble for your body and mind. The Chinese Organ Body Clock developed by Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) doctors states that chi moves around our body at different times of the day and if there is a certain blockage in any organs, it could force you to wake up.

By knowing the reasons why you are waking up in the middle of the night, you can then find the solutions to better sleep which can range from relaxing the mind, proper food intake to exercising regularly or even releasing your anger. Check out below for the possible reasons as to why you are waking up at a particular time.

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Problems Sleeping Between 11 PM – 1 AM: Self-Esteem Issues

If one has a problem sleeping between this timing, it could mean you’re being too judgmental on yourself or others. According to the Chinese Medicine Body Block, being disappointed by a loved one can also trigger this stage of wakefulness, making you unable to sleep or forcing you to wake up during this time. Being mindful at times and not being too judgmental can help the situation and reading self-help books can also help in your confidence level.

Physically, having trouble sleeping during this time could mean that your gall bladder is trying to tell you to eat lesser fatty foods, smoke less and reduce caffeine. This is to ensure that your gall bladder is working at its optimum level and that it’s energy stores are not depleted by these harmful substances.

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Waking Up Between 1 AM – 3 AM: Guilt & Rage

According to the Chinese Organ Body Clock, guilt and rage are associated with this timing. The anger lingering from the heated argument you recently had with your partner or at work could be waking you up in the dead of night and having excess of these feelings can also be contributing to it. Releasing anger and changing your perspective to seek clarity could be the solution.

Waking up between 1 AM and 3 AM could mean that your liver is struggling. Knowing how important our liver is, problems with waking up during this time should be addressed as soon as possible. It could mean that your liver is being overworked with all the toxins to deal with and a solution could be readjusting your diet to healthier eating and reducing alcohol.

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Waking Up Between 3 AM – 5 AM: Grief & Sadness

Grief and sadness is linked to this timing. Waking up during this timing is suggestive of negative things that has happened in your life such as the death of a loved one or a breakup. Talking to family members or confiding in close friends can do a lot of good to your emotional well-being and although it can be difficult, finding ways to move on is important.

Physically, this is when our lungs collect the most oxygen to move it to other parts of the body to prepare it for a new day. Removal of toxins also happens in the process. If you find yourself coughing and waking up at this time, the solution could be to consume better foods and breathing in cleaner air.

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Waking Up Between 5 AM – 7 AM: Feeling Stuck in Life

Feeling stuck about the lack of growth in one’s life is also a critical emotional problem if you wake up during this time. A good way to solve this is to have a morning ritual that makes you happy and driven such as planning the day ahead, listening to uplifting music or simple meditating to clear the mind for the day ahead.

There might also be problems with your large intestine if you’re waking up during this time. Having bowel movements during this time is normal and to help with the process, it is always important to drink lots of water.

Troubleshooting Made Easy

If you are unsure at what times you are waking up during the night, have a notebook placed beside you and if there is ever a time you wake up and can’t get back to sleep, record that time in that notebook. By tracking our pattern of sleep, we are able to troubleshoot it and find the best solutions for better sleep in the future.

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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