Advertising
Advertising

Why Empaths Are Easily Attracted To Narcissists

Why Empaths Are Easily Attracted To Narcissists

As an empath, the chances are that you will have been attracted to one or more narcissists during your lifetime. This type of instinctive attraction can be confusing, particularly when you continue to enter into such relationships after being hurt repeatedly in the past.

Not only can relationships between these two diametrically opposed personality types cause considerable pain, but they are also exhausting and emotionally draining in equal measure. So while some may argue that these unions reflect nature’s way of restoring balance to the world, the individuals involved are often left search for answers.

Advertising

From a more analytical perspective, however, there are grounds to believe that both empaths and narcissists boast attributes that appeal to the others’ psyche. This is bad news for the former, however, whose earnest goodness is often misconstrued for weakness over time and makes them a target for their partners angst. With this in mind, let’s take a closer look at how this toxic psychological relationship unfolds and the key elements that draws an empath to a narcissist:

1. All Narcissists are wounded

While narcissists may present themselves in many different ways, they all tend to share one basic characteristic. This is that they are wounded, either from a long-standing childhood trauma or a steady stream of failures that have occurred in their adult lives. So despite the fact that narcissists often display over-confidence or arrogance when dealing with others, this masks a deeper sense of worthlessness and a true lack of self-belief. Consequently, narcissists are often in desperate need of validation, and it is this vulnerability that appeals to a true empath and sparks an initial attraction.

Advertising

2. Empaths are natural and sensitive healers

So why should a wounded narcissist appeal to an empath? The reason is that these people are natural healers as well as being extremely sensitive to others needs. This means that not only are they able to recognise the hidden vulnerability within narcissists, but they also have a strong desire to absorb their pain and empower their growth. This subsequently creates a sudden and powerful bond, and one which initially provides emotional satisfaction for both parties.

This short-term gratification also fuels the attraction between the two, while creating greater confusion when the relationship begins to unravel.

Advertising

3. Narcissists are able to Manipulate the Qualities of an Empath

On a final note, it is important to understand that narcissists are typically manipulative by nature. This enables them to capitalise on the core emotional qualities of an empath, whose agenda of love, healing and care makes them liable to forgive transgressions and negative behaviour. This only fuels the narcissist’s sense of power and control, enabling them to manipulate the situation while also fulfilling the empath’s desire to help others. As a result of this, empaths are often led to believe that they are in a healthy relationship that can stand the true test of time.

In Summary

The last point reveals why relationships between empaths and narcissists are bound to fail, as the latter are renowned takers and likely to drain the energy of the former over time. While a narcissist may be materialistically generous when it comes to lavishing their loved ones with gifts and investing in a diamond engagement ring, for example, they gradually draw the life out of empaths and leave them emotionally broken.

Advertising

So while the attraction between narcissists and empaths is undeniable and easy to understand from a psychological perspective, it is extremely destructive and likely to cause a tremendous amount of emotional pain. Understanding this crucial, especially if you are to break negative patterns of behaviour and build towards a happier future.

More by this author

10 Reasons A Long-Distance Relationship Will Work 12 iPhone 6 Tricks You Probably Don’t Know But Should We Are Often Confused Empathy With Sympathy but What’s The Difference Actually? To Make Wise Decisions, Ask Yourself These Questions Every Time No Matter What You Say, the First Thing People Pay Attention to Is Only How You Say It

Trending in Communication

110 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks 2When You Start to Enjoy Being Single, These 12 Things Will Happen 321 Best Tips On Making A Long Distance Relationship Work 4The Skill That Most People Don’t Have: Active Listening 518 Signs You’ve Found Your Soulmate

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on August 16, 2018

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Enjoy Taking Risks

The ability to take risks by stepping outside your comfort zone is the primary way by which we grow. But we are often afraid to take that first step.

In truth, comfort zones are not really about comfort, they are about fear. Break the chains of fear to get outside. Once you do, you will learn to enjoy the process of taking risks and growing in the process.

Here are 10 ways to help you step out of your comfort zone and get closer to success:

1. Become aware of what’s outside of your comfort zone

What are the things that you believe are worth doing but are afraid of doing yourself because of the potential for disappointment or failure?

Draw a circle and write those things down outside the circle. This process will not only allow you to clearly identify your discomforts, but your comforts. Write identified comforts inside the circle.

2. Become clear about what you are aiming to overcome

Take the list of discomforts and go deeper. Remember, the primary emotion you are trying to overcome is fear.

Advertising

How does this fear apply uniquely to each situation? Be very specific.

Are you afraid of walking up to people and introducing yourself in social situations? Why? Is it because you are insecure about the sound of your voice? Are you insecure about your looks?

Or, are you afraid of being ignored?

3. Get comfortable with discomfort

One way to get outside of your comfort zone is to literally expand it. Make it a goal to avoid running away from discomfort.

Let’s stay with the theme of meeting people in social settings. If you start feeling a little panicked when talking to someone you’ve just met, try to stay with it a little longer than you normally would before retreating to comfort. If you stay long enough and practice often enough, it will start to become less uncomfortable.

4. See failure as a teacher

Many of us are so afraid of failure that we would rather do nothing than take a shot at our dreams.

Advertising

Begin to treat failure as a teacher. What did you learn from the experience? How can you take that lesson to your next adventure to increase your chance of success?

Many highly successful people failed plenty of times before they succeeded. Here’re some examples:

10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

5. Take baby steps

Don’t try to jump outside your comfort zone, you will likely become overwhelmed and jump right back in.

Take small steps toward the fear you are trying to overcome. If you want to do public speaking, start by taking every opportunity to speak to small groups of people. You can even practice with family and friends.

Take a look at this article on how you can start taking baby steps:

Advertising

The Number One Secret to Life Success: Baby Steps

6. Hang out with risk takers

There is no substitute for this step. If you want to become better at something, you must start hanging out with the people who are doing what you want to do and start emulating them. (Here’re 8 Reasons Why Risk Takers Are More Likely To Be Successful).

Almost inevitably, their influence will start have an effect on your behavior.

7. Be honest with yourself when you are trying to make excuses

Don’t say “Oh, I just don’t have the time for this right now.” Instead, be honest and say “I am afraid to do this.”

Don’t make excuses, just be honest. You will be in a better place to confront what is truly bothering you and increase your chance of moving forward.

8. Identify how stepping out will benefit you

What will the ability to engage in public speaking do for your personal and professional growth? Keep these potential benefits in mind as motivations to push through fear.

Advertising

9. Don’t take yourself too seriously

Learn to laugh at yourself when you make mistakes. Risk taking will inevitably involve failure and setbacks that will sometimes make you look foolish to others. Be happy to roll with the punches when others poke fun.

If you aren’t convinced yet, check out these 6 Reasons Not to Take Life So Seriously.

10. Focus on the fun

Enjoy the process of stepping outside your safe boundaries. Enjoy the fun of discovering things about yourself that you may not have been aware of previously.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Read Next