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Why People Who Choose To Leave Bravely Are Really Amazing

Why People Who Choose To Leave Bravely Are Really Amazing

Parting is an all-around difficult endeavor. We don’t want to hurt or disappointment people, and we don’t want to be disappointed. The feelings of rejection can overwhelm the one left behind, even if they corroborate the split. Oftentimes the individual who instigates a breakup has had to overcome incredible personal struggles to make their decision.

The woman who makes the difficult choice to leave is coincidentally, giving herself a great opportunity. When she chooses to leave, she elects to reckon with her sense of self-worth, happiness, and guilt. Hebbard says that the woman who works through the emotions that arise, makes the decision to leave from a place of empowerment.

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Oftentimes, the decision process is a meandering, dialectic one. In other words, we go back and forth on what we think is the right thing to do perhaps several times before we come to a final decision. The fear of leaving what she had was greater than her desire to believe that she was worth better.

We get used to situations, relationships, jobs, and lifestyles and overlook the details about them we dislike the most. Particularly difficult to question are the relationships we’ve outgrown, or that have outgrown us. We might grow tired in our dysfunctional relationships. Sometimes we have to hit rock bottom before we are able to see that we are responsible for our happiness.

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It takes a lot of courage to be honest with oneself. Even when we do manage to see ourselves as accountable for our well-being, we may not be ready to move forward. We’ve invested so much in the job that no longer gives us fulfilment, for example. Leaving it would destabilize our own understanding of ourselves. Choosing to leave is to be willing to let go of our identity, or at least reshape it. Though you might not know how you’ll cope when you lose the parts of yourself that you’ve identified with for so long. This fear alone can be enough to prevent us from change, no matter how dire the situation.

It takes a big heart to face the music and choose to leave. But when you look back later in future, you’ll find that you’re perfectly ok without that, or actually you’re much happier and better living without that.

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It takes true bravery to leave. There’s a lot that must be sacrificed to make a big change; there’s good reason to be fearful. It’s this life-changing moment when we choose to see ourselves with self-compassion that healing is possible. These brave people have helped shape our lives for the better. We can see the evidence when we look back to our pasts, to the substantial turning points where our life paths have taken new trajectories. It’s also important to recognize where we’ve been that individual who’s chosen to leave bravely, and to have compassion for ourselves.

Featured photo credit: Jen Palmer via Unsplash.com via unsplash.com

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Last Updated on February 13, 2019

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

Think being happy is something that happens as a result of luck, circumstance, having money, etc.? Think again.

Happiness is a mindset. And if you’re looking to improve your ability to find happiness, then check out these 10 things happy people do differently.

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. -Dalai Lama

1. Happy people find balance in their lives.

Folks who are happy have this in common: they’re content with what they have, and don’t waste a whole lot of time worrying and stressing over things they don’t. Unhappy people do the opposite: they spend too much time thinking about what they don’t have. Happy people lead balanced lives. This means they make time for all the things that are important to them, whether it’s family, friends, career, health, religion, etc.

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2. Happy people abide by the golden rule.

You know that saying you heard when you were a kid, “Do unto others as you would have them do to you.” Well, happy people truly embody this principle. They treat others with respect. They’re sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of other people. They’re compassionate. And they get treated this way (most of the time) in return.

3. Happy people don’t sweat the small stuff.

One of the biggest things happy people do differently compared to unhappy people is they let stuff go. Bad things happen to good people sometimes. Happy people realize this, are able to take things in stride, and move on. Unhappy people tend to dwell on minor inconveniences and issues, which can perpetuate feelings of sadness, guilt, resentment, greed, and anger.

4. Happy people take responsibility for their actions.

Happy people aren’t perfect, and they’re well aware of that. When they screw up, they admit it. They recognize their faults and work to improve on them. Unhappy people tend to blame others and always find an excuse why things aren’t going their way. Happy people, on the other hand, live by the mantra:

“There are two types of people in the world: those that do and those that make excuses why they don’t.”

5. Happy people surround themselves with other happy people.

happiness surrounding

    One defining characteristic of happy people is they tend to hang out with other happy people. Misery loves company, and unhappy people gravitate toward others who share their negative sentiments. If you’re struggling with a bout of sadness, depression, worry, or anger, spend more time with your happiest friends or family members. Chances are, you’ll find that their positive attitude rubs off on you.

    6. Happy people are honest with themselves and others.

    People who are happy often exhibit the virtues of honesty and trustworthiness. They would rather give you candid feedback, even when the truth hurts, and they expect the same in return. Happy people respect people who give them an honest opinion.

    7. Happy people show signs of happiness.

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    smile

      This one may sound obvious but it’s a key differentiator between happy and unhappy people. Think about your happiest friends. Chances are, the mental image you form is of them smiling, laughing, and appearing genuinely happy. On the flip side, those who aren’t happy tend to look the part. Their posture may be slouched and you may perceive a lack of confidence.

      8. Happy people are passionate.

      Another thing happy people have in common is their ability to find their passions in life and pursue those passions to the fullest. Happy people have found what they’re looking for, and they spend their time doing what they love.

      9. Happy people see challenges as opportunities.

      Folks who are happy accept challenges and use them as opportunities to learn and grow. They turn negatives into positives and make the best out of seemingly bad situations. They don’t dwell on things that are out of their control; rather, they seek solutions and creative ways of overcoming obstacles.

      10. Happy people live in the present.

      While unhappy people tend to dwell on the past and worry about the future, happy people live in the moment. They are grateful for “the now” and focus their efforts on living life to the fullest in the present. Their philosophy is:

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      There’s a reason it’s called “the present.” Because life is a gift.

      So if you’d like to bring a little more happiness into your life, think about the 10 principles above and how you can use them to make yourself better.

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