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8 Reasons Traveling Is Always Better Than Dating Someone

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8 Reasons Traveling Is Always Better Than Dating Someone

Dating can be hard and sometimes we feel under pressure to meet that special someone. Perhaps as a single person, you want to go off and create new experiences but feel you should be dating instead. We’re told dating is fun and exciting, which it can be, but what about finding something that gives you so many more unique experiences, allows you to grow and for you to get to know yourself in ways dating and being in a relationship just can’t give you?

If you find you’re single and feel dating isn’t for you right now, then traveling can be the perfect way to enrich your life and provides you with many advantages compared to getting involved with the dating scene. Traveling is a whole different way to build up your character and confidence which will shape you into the person that can be ready for a relationship somewhere down the line. With that in mind, here are 8 reasons why the experience of traveling will benefit you far more than dating.

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1. You Are Free To Create Your Own Experiences

When traveling, you are free to create the itinerary and control how long you stay in each place. Your independent decisions are based on your desires and wants and yours alone. In a relationship, changes can sometimes be out of your control while you are in control of how you create your experience while traveling – whether it’s how long you stay in one place or where you’re going to go to next. You gain a sense of freedom that being in a relationship doesn’t always give you.

2. Traveling Improves Your Mental Health

Traveling opens your mind and carves out new positive experiences that directly benefit your state of mind and happiness levels. Traveling enriches you and adds unique perspectives and strengthens a positive mindset that will transcend for a lifetime. Relationships can be hard work and while there are also positive benefits to a good relationship, dating someone who you’re not truly a match with can bring mental exhaustion and a feeling of unhappiness.

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3. You’re Free To Move From One Place To Another

Relationships can be restricting. There is always another person you have to keep in mind when making any decisions and their ideas and wants may not be the same as yours. Compromise is a must in any relationship but when you’re out there in the big wide world, you have no one to answer to. You’re free to roam how you want to roam without any restrictions from someone else – no consulting, no discussions, you’re in complete control of your journey and you can shape it exactly how you want it to be.

4. You Have The Space To Understand Yourself

Dating can sometimes take away your sense of self especially early on in a relationship. You can easily be subject to the influence of the other person and unknowingly lose yourself in the process. When you’re traveling, you have the space to fully learn about yourself in ways you can’t when closely tied with another person. The experiences you face will allow you to value yourself and even question your own values – it gives you a unique insight into how you react and adapt to different situations and people you meet.

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5. You Learn Being Alone Doesn’t Mean Being Lonely

Relationships and dating can mean we’re very reliant on the other person being around. When they’re not, it can induce feelings of loneliness such is our adaptation to someone outside of ourselves. You also hear how people in bad relationships can feel lonely despite being in the same room as their significant other. With traveling you truly learn how to be alone and you realize it doesn’t mean you are lonely. Traveling can restore your faith in humanity when you realise just how many wonderful people you are surrounded by and are eager and willing to help you and establish friendships. Sometimes relationships can keep you in a bubble that stops you from really experiencing the positives of being alone and the freedom of knowing it doesn’t mean you’re lonely.

6. You Learn To Solve Problems By Yourself

Traveling can be a steep learning curve and sometimes you have to make decisions on the spot or solve any quandaries that may arise. It’s an amazing way to build your confidence and show yourself just what you’re made of. Being in a relationship can often mean depending on someone else to sort out problems or at least help you out which takes away that character-building aspect that will go on to benefit you through life.

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7. You Learn Life Is Full Of Possibilities

Traveling exposes you to all sorts of surprises and possibilities – it really is an exciting and eye-opening experience so why choose this over being restricted by one person? Relationships can be good but they can inadvertently stop you from gaining all these amazing opportunities that you wouldn’t even be aware of if you didn’t pursue traveling. Going off and exploring the world teaches you many more things than staying at home and living your life with someone especially when you’re young.

8. You Can Just Enjoy The Moment Without Worries

Traveling is one big journey full of wondrous moments that you can just breathe in without a care in the world. There’s no pressure to think about the future or the past – you are truly living in the present moment – the only way to be completely happy. In relationships we tend to get caught up in everyday worries about finances or plans that are only magnified with another person in the mix. Being by yourself and drinking in the experiences each moment gives you, is much more easily absorbed and appreciated.

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Whatever age you are or stage in life you’re at, do what makes you happy. If happiness is packing your life into a rucksack and taking off for adventures far and wide then definitely do it with intention and lack of worry. Remember, you are capable of forming relationships anywhere and at anytime, so never feel restricted or afraid to do it alone and relationship-free.

Featured photo credit: stokpic.com via pexels.com

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Jenny Marchal

A passionate writer who loves sharing about positive psychology.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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