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Why Some People Are Afraid Of Talking On The Phone

Why Some People Are Afraid Of Talking On The Phone

Today’s society communicates more than any previous generation, however it also “communicates” the least at the same time. Before text and email were invented, people either had to have face to face conversation, talk on the phone, or write letters to one another. Now, more and more people find that they prefer texting and emailing over any other form of communication. Although we communicate more, we have lost the true art of conversation. A new part of today’s problem, is phone anxiety disorder. Here are a few habits that could indicate you have phone anxiety:

  1. You often let your phone ring, only to text the caller pretending you missed their call.
  2. Your voicemail message says “don’t leave a message, just text me”
  3. You have disabled your voicemail altogether.

Why Does Phone Anxiety Exist?

1. Insecurity – When you can’t see the person you are talking to, you don’t really know how they’re reacting to your words. People can feel insecure about phone conversations because even though the person on the other end sounds like they are in agreement, they may actually be rolling their eyes at what you are saying.

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2. Social Awkwardness – The thought of running out of things to say can strike fear into a person’s heart at the very mention of talking on the phone. Dead air is one of the worst things that can happen to someone with phone anxiety!

3. Distraction – Some people need to type out their responses in a text message, or see the person to whom they are speaking to, in order to stay focused on the conversation. Distractions while on the phone can be a huge problem because there could be so many different things happening around you, you may end up losing track of what the other person had been saying for the last good amount of time. It’s embarrassing and awkward to have to admit that you weren’t paying attention, and then ask them to repeat their story.

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4. Ending the call – Some people with phone anxiety struggle with how to end calls. You need to hang up the phone, but because you feel awkward, winding down the conversation ends up being blunt or clumsy, causing you even more anxiety.

5. Lack of control – Texting and emailing allow you to have total control over what you are saying and how you are generally being perceived. You can plan out your responses, take your time, read over what you’ve written, and re-write parts that could possibly be taken the wrong way- or decide not to respond at all! With a phone conversation, none of the options above are possible.

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What Can You Do About Your Phone Anxiety?

Psychologists have a number of suggestions as to how people who suffer from phone anxiety can deal with their problem:

  1. Remember you are not alone. Psychologists report that phone anxiety disorder is extremely common, so the chances are pretty high that the person on the other end could also be feeling anxious talking to you! Think about how you can help the other person through their own phone anxiety, and it might even help you forget about your own.
  2. Figure out why talking on the phone makes you anxious. Sometimes the root of the problem has nothing to do with the problem itself. For example, you might have suffered rejection over the phone earlier in life, and what you are really afraid of is experiencing that rejection again, not actually speaking on the phone! Deal with the root of the issue, and the symptoms of the problem will go away.
  3. Take baby steps. If you have an issue, it can take a while to fully deal with it. Don’t get discouraged if you can’t seem to overcome your phone anxiety right away. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction, so don’t despise small beginnings! Start slow, and work your way up. Try ordering take-out over the phone instead of doing it online this week. You will never see the person on the other end, so if you mess up a little bit, it doesn’t even matter. Once you don’t feel nervous about it, you can move on to more serious phone calls.
  4. Change the way you think. Someone wise once said, “If your way of thinking has brought you to a place you don’t like, then have another thought! Think again!” Changing the way you think can seem like a daunting task, but according to psychologists, it is possible. You literally have to rewire your brain to associate talking on the phone as a normal thing to do, instead of associating this activity with fear and anxiety. The only way to do this is to face your fear. Don’t worry though, baby steps are still recommended.

Featured photo credit: woman-calling-with-her-phone-picjumbo-com via picjumbo

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Last Updated on October 9, 2018

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

Who has never gone through some ups and downs in the life? But some people can feel better in a quicker way than others because they’ve found their own remedies to heal the bad feelings.

If you haven’t found yours, these ways will help you instantly feel better and ditch that negative self talk when you’re feeling bad about yourself:

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  1. Listen to the songs you loved when you were in high school or university, this will recall you of the old good times.
  2. Write something. Write down how you feel as a way to express your thoughts if you don’t feel like talking to anyone.
  3. Draw something. Draw anything you want because no one’s going to judge your drawing skills.
  4. Read the postcards or letters your friends or family sent you before, remind yourself there are people who always remember you.
  5. Silently think of a day or moment which you truly enjoyed and try to recapture that very first feeling. Was it the day of your graduation? The moment you traveled with your loved one?
  6. Take out your photo albums and go over your childhood photos.
  7. Cry when you feel like doing so. There’s nothing wrong with crying; cry out all your fear and stress and just face the truth after crying.
  8. Sing loudly like no one can hear you. Do you know that in Japan, people always sing karaoke to relieve stress?
  9. Cook a nice meal for yourself or for your family.
  10. Read your previous diary entries and look at your great memories.
  11. Dress up nicely to feel happier.
  12. Don’t stay in your bed! Get your laptop or a book and sit in a coffee place.
  13. Take a walk outside and feel the fresh air.
  14. Sweat yourself! Go jogging or play some sports.
  15. Pick up the musical instrument you used to play a lot and start to play it.
  16. Tidy up your desk or wardrobe, you’ll feel good that you’re being productive and actually doing something.
  17. Watch some funny videos, sure you can find a lot of them on Youtube.
  18. Eat something you like, be it a chocolate cake, or an ice-cream. Just please yourself with the flavour you like.
  19. Re-read your favorite book and write down the sentences or passages that you love.
  20. Watch a new movie, there must be a movie which you’ve always interested in but had no time to watch it.
  21. Do something nice that no one will notice, say picking up a rubbish in the street and throw it to a trash bin.
  22. Call your best friend and just talk whatever you want! Human beings are social animals after all, connecting with people close to you will make you feel better.
  23. Do voluntary work and help people in need, you’ll feel happy and satisfied.
  24. Get drunk with your close friends at home – a safe place for you to get drunk and get crazy. Let loose and have fun with your very close friends.
  25. Write an email or a note to a friend who you care about.
  26. Get out of your routine life and meet new friends. Get out of your comfort zone! Meeting new people can give you new inspirations in life.
  27. Look into the mirror and smile. Act like today’s already a wonderful day. How we act affects how we feel. It’s difficult to go on feeling sad if you’re trying to smile!

Remember:

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It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.  — Epictetus

If you want to feel better, change what you’re doing because obviously what you’re doing doesn’t make you happy!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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