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11 Hidden Signs You’re Highly Empathetic But You May Not Even Notice That

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11 Hidden Signs You’re Highly Empathetic But You May Not Even Notice That

Have you been hearing the word “empathy” everywhere? Have you wondered how empathy or an empathetic person is defined? To put it simply, it is the ability to step into the shoes of other people, with the aim to better understand their feelings so you can further discover who they are and what drives them to make particular decisions. Maybe you suspect you’re highly empathetic, but you’re not exactly sure. Let’s dig a little bit deeper here and find out:

1. Being in Public Places is Extremely Stressful

It’s not that you don’t like other people, highly empathetic people are extremely sensitive. Meaning, they are highly tuned in to others’ emotions and energy. Being in a public place with a lot of people is essentially overstimulating.

2. Labeled as Moody

An empathetic person will most likely share their mood with the world regardless of whether their mood is shy, disconnected, happy, crabby or filled with joy. Because of the highly sensitive nature of an empathetic person, they can appear moody and are often labeled as emotionally unstable.

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3. Battles with Fatigue

Empathetic people tend to be plagued with fatigue or low levels of energy. It’s almost as if being surrounded by other people sucks their life energy from them.

4. Human Lie Detector

Highly empathetic people are acutely tuned into others’ energy, so being able to sense when someone is being dishonest is an innate skill.

5. Need for Alone Time

The need to be alone is a must when you’re constantly digesting others’ energy. Think of it as a time to recharge.

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6. Enjoys Daydreaming

A unique characteristic of an empathetic person is one who thoroughly enjoys the act of daydreaming. It affords the highly sensitive person a moment to create blissful happiness on their own terms.

7. Knowledge Seeker

To go without an answer to a question is a big no to a highly empathetic person. They are constantly seeking an explanation and an answer to their burning questions.

8. A Free Spirit

Empathetic people are usually called free spirits. They enjoy traveling, random adventures, and personal freedoms. Because during travel and adventures, they can understand more about different people and cultures, and also more about themselves. This is a gift, and more often like a mission.

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9. Rules and Routine are Torture

Empathetic people value their freedom and ability to flow with the wind. Anything that slightly resembles a routine instantly blocks their flow of energy, which in turn feels like imprisonment to this highly sensitive person.

10. Easily Bored or Distracted

Work, relationships, school and home life needs to be interesting to a highly empathetic person otherwise they tend to lose interest. If an empathetic person has lost interest you will often find them daydreaming or finding other activities to do for further stimulation.

11. Creative Force

This highly sensitive person is a creative beings they have a lot of insights when having a deep understanding of different people. They have strong creative needs and desires and require outlets for creativity to flow on a consistent basis.

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Conclusion

Maybe you just realized you’re a highly empathetic person and were not aware of that before, or you already knew it going into this article.  Either way, some researchers say approximately twenty percent of the population are highly empathetic people, which is refreshing to know you’re not alone.  Some days being empathetic may seem like a cur, but don’t forget you have a gift that allows you keen awareness to understand what others are going through.

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Tara Massan

Founder of Be Moved, Life Coach and Writer.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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