Advertising
Advertising

4 Things Your Boss Doesn’t Want To Hear (And What To Say Instead)

4 Things Your Boss Doesn’t Want To Hear (And What To Say Instead)

Even though we’re seeing impressive recovery from the Great Recession, many companies are still on edge, considering low profits and nerve wracking bottom lines. For those who want to keep their jobs and advance up the promotional ladder, communicating carefully to the higher ups is crucial. Business always try to attract top talent, but ultimately it’s up to you to make it happen. Here are four things your boss absolutely does not want to hear from you, and what you should say instead.

I don’t have enough time

Since well before the recession officially started, companies have been downsizing, consolidating, and making the employees who are left take on more and more tasks. None of us have enough time, and that almost certainly includes your boss.

Instead of sounding cranky and frustrated, try out:

“I would love to take that on. Can we sit down and discuss prioritizing that with the other tasks I have?”

The key here is that you don’t want to just say yes, especially if you’re already busy. You’ll end up overwhelmed and overworked, and that’s not fun or fair. But at the same time, you need to appear willing. By implying to your boss that something else is going to have to fall off your plate if you add this on, they (should) get the hint to make sure that they’re asking you to do something business crucial. Sometimes, going an extra mile counts a lot in the long run.

It’s all Someone Else’s fault

This is just as annoying as its cousin, It’s Not My Fault. Blaming someone else is not the way an adult manages a situation. Even if it isn’t your fault, pointing the finger makes you sound like a spoiled child who let the dog eat their homework. If the problem really was your fault, just apologize, tell your boss what you’re going to do to make sure it doesn’t happen again, and then make sure it doesn’t happen again.

If it actually was all someone else’s fault, try:

“I understand your concern. I agree that this situation did not play out in a way that was positive for the company. I’d like to sit down with both you and [whoever is at fault] to better understand what went wrong and how to manage this better next time.” 

I can’t do that

There are two things that “I can’t” might mean. The first is that you actually can’t, in which case there are more business positive ways to phrase things. The second is that you won’t, in which case you’re better off stating the source of your objection from the beginning. If you really and truly can’t – when your boss is asking you to draw two red lines in blue ink, for example – then you could try “I’m sorry, I’m a little confused. Are you asking me to…” And then restate their request. This usually clears up any confusion and gets their respect, and if not, it’s the beginning of a dialogue to make sure clarity is reached.

If what you mean is you won’t, then try:

“There’s a lot of potential here, but I see some challenges. Our mission statement says that we prioritize customer satisfaction at all costs, so it seems like raising prices while lowering services might be contradictory with that?”

I’m so hungover

Or “My spouse is so aggravating,” or “Jane in accounting is so mean,” or intimate details of your Friday night date. Your boss is not your best friend, or if they are, talk about those things outside of work, not inside the building.

Advertising

You need to be careful whenever you share personal information in a work setting. While all sorts of discrimination are technically illegal, proving discrimination is much more difficult than it looks on paper, and many employees choose to keep a strict separation between their private and personal lives, just in case.

Know your boss; some managers understand and embrace the fact that their employees have lives outside of work, and really mean it when they ask how you’re doing. Others just take surveys from employees to get feedback, and are less open to these sorts of conversations.

If you really are hungover – well, maybe avoid drinking so much on work nights. If your boss asks how you’re doing because you’re clearly unwell, try:

“I apologize, I’m really not at my best. I’m going to get a cup of coffee and focus in on (whatever project you have at the top of your to-do list).”

The key here is to show your boss that even though you’re at work and obviously not feeling well, you’re still focused on work and going to do your best.

Featured photo credit: Kevin Dooley via flickr.com

More by this author

Margarita Hakobyan

MBA from the University of Utah

7 Tools To Help You Build And Automate Your Online Business 6 Things Your Moving Company Might Not Tell You How To Create A Money Making Blog Starting A Blog? Here are 5 Things You Should Know 4 Things Your Boss Doesn’t Want To Hear (And What To Say Instead)

Trending in Work

1 10 Simple Yet Powerful Business Goals to Set This Year 2 13 Characteristics of Highly Successful Entrepreneurs 3 5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All 4 10 Simple Habits Every Effective Manager Needs to Learn 5 10 Ways To Help Your Employees Have A Healthy Work-Life Balance

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on March 29, 2021

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

5 Types of Horrible Bosses and How to Beat Them All

When I left university I took a job immediately, I had been lucky as I had spent a year earning almost nothing as an intern so I was offered a role. On my first day I found that I had not been allocated a desk, there was no one to greet me so I was left for some hours ignored. I happened to snipe about this to another employee at the coffee machine two things happened. The first was that the person I had complained to was my new manager’s wife, and the second was, in his own words, ‘that he would come down on me like a ton of bricks if I crossed him…’

What a great start to a job! I had moved to a new city, and had been at work for less than a morning when I had my first run in with the first style of bad manager. I didn’t stay long enough to find out what Mr Agressive would do next. Bad managers are a major issue. Research from Approved Index shows that more than four in ten employees (42%) state that they have previously quit a job because of a bad manager.

The Dream Type Of Manager

My best manager was a total opposite. A man who had been the head of the UK tax system and was working his retirement running a company I was a very junior and green employee for. I made a stupid mistake, one which cost a lot of time and money and I felt I was going to be sacked without doubt.

I was nervous, beating myself up about what I had done, what would happen. At the end of the day I was called to his office, he had made me wait and I had spent that day talking to other employees, trying to understand where I had gone wrong. It had been a simple mistyped line of code which sent a massive print job out totally wrong. I learn how I should have done it and I fretted.

My boss asked me to step into his office, he asked me to sit down. “Do you know what you did?” I babbled, yes, I had been stupid, I had not double-checked or asked for advice when I was doing something I had not really understood. It was totally my fault. He paused. “Will you do that again?” Of course I told him I would not, I would always double check, ask for help and not try to be so clever when I was not!

Advertising

“Okay…”

That was it. I paused and asked, should I clear my desk. He smiled. “You have learnt a valuable lesson, I can be sure that you will never make a mistake like that again. Why would I want to get rid of an employee who knows that?”

I stayed with that company for many years, the way I was treated was a real object lesson in good management. Sadly, far too many poor managers exist out there.

The Complete Catalogue of Bad Managers

The Bully

My first boss fitted into the classic bully class. This is so often the ‘old school’ management by power style. I encountered this style again in the retail sector where one manager felt the only way to get the best from staff was to bawl and yell.

However, like so many bullies you will often find that this can be someone who either knows no better or is under stress and they are themselves running scared of the situation they have found themselves in.

Advertising

The Invisible Boss

This can either present itself as management from afar (usually the golf course or ‘important meetings) or just a boss who is too busy being important to deal with their staff.

It can feel refreshing as you will often have almost total freedom with your manager taking little or no interest in your activities, however you will soon find that you also lack the support that a good manager will provide. Without direction you may feel you are doing well just to find that you are not delivering against expectations you were not told about and suddenly it is all your fault.

The Micro Manager

The frustration of having a manager who feels the need to be involved in everything you do. The polar opposite to the Invisible Boss you will feel that there is no trust in your work as they will want to meddle in everything you do.

Dealing with the micro-manager can be difficult. Often their management style comes from their own insecurity. You can try confronting them, tell them that you can do your job however in many cases this will not succeed and can in fact make things worse.

The Over Promoted Boss

The Over promoted boss categorises someone who has no idea. They have found themselves in a management position through service, family or some corporate mystery. They are people who are not only highly unqualified to be managers they will generally be unable to do even your job.

Advertising

You can find yourself persistently frustrated by the situation you are in, however it can seem impossible to get out without handing over your resignation.

The Credit Stealer

The credit stealer is the boss who will never publically acknowledge the work you do. You will put in the extra hours working on a project and you know that, in the ‘big meeting’ it will be your credit stealing boss who will take all of the credit!

Again it is demoralising, you see all of the credit for your labour being stolen and this can often lead to good employees looking for new careers.

3 Essential Ways to Work (Cope) with Bad Managers

Whatever type of bad boss you have there are certain things that you can do to ensure that you get the recognition and protection you require to not only remain sane but to also build your career.

1. Keep evidence

Whether it is incidents with the bully or examples of projects you have completed with the credit stealer you will always be well served to keep notes and supporting evidence for projects you are working on.

Advertising

Buy your own notebook and ensure that you are always making notes, it becomes a habit and a very useful one as you have a constant reminder as well as somewhere to explore ideas.

Importantly, if you do have to go to HR or stand-up for yourself you will have clear records! Also, don’t always trust that corporate servers or emails will always be available or not tampered with. Keep your own content.

2. Hold regular meetings

Ensure that you make time for regular meetings with your boss. This is especially useful for the over-promoted or the invisible boss to allow you to ‘manage upwards’. Take charge where you can to set your objectives and use these meetings to set clear objectives and document the status of your work.

3. Stand your ground, but be ready to jump…

Remember that you don’t have to put up with poor management. If you have issues you should face them with your boss, maybe they do not know that they are coming across in a bad way.

However, be ready to recognise if the situation is not going to change. If that is the case, keep your head down and get working on polishing your CV! If it isn’t working, there will be something better out there for you!

Good luck!

Read Next