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5 Ways to Break Bad Habits That Harm You (And Replace Them With Good Ones)

5 Ways to Break Bad Habits That Harm You (And Replace Them With Good Ones)

From biting our nails to eating junk food, we all have bad habits. Some of us have figured out how to break these bad habits, while others continue to carry out harmful habits in our daily lives.

Bad habits drain the energy from our lives and prevent us from achieving our goals. The most dangerous thing about bad habits is that most of us aren’t aware that we have them in the first place.

We’ve talked previously about how to design productive morning routines and how to make it stick when you learn something new, so in this article we’re going to share how to break bad habits and replace them with good ones.

First, let’s discover how bad habits begin.

How Bad Habits Start

No matter what habit we’re forming — good or bad — it starts with a habit loop. The loop is a three-part process that starts with the “cue,” which tells our brain to go into automatic mode and let the behavior unfold.

Then there’s the “routine,” which is the behavior itself. The last part of the process is the “reward,” which is what will help your brain remember the “habit loop” in the future.

Habit-Loop

    When you repeat the habit loop enough times, your brain requires less and less energy to perform the same activity again. As the behavior starts to become automatic, your brain can almost shut down while performing the action. This is a real advantage because it means that you can devote all of your energy towards to something else, whether that’s learning a new skill or building a new habit.

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    The bad news is that this can be a double-edged sword. Since the habit loop can be applied for bad habits as well as good habits, you can find yourself carrying out bad habits without even realizing it.

    According to human behavior expert James Clear, most bad habits are caused by two things: stress and boredom.

    Like solving any problem, if we can get to the root of what’s causing our stress and boredom, then we can reduce the likelihood of forming another bad habit. It could also be the case that your bad habits are actually caused by deeper issues that you’ve experienced in your life.

    Ask yourself: are there limiting beliefs or fears that are holding you back or causing you hold onto something that is harming you?

    For example, opening up social media or your email inbox in the morning may be a bad habit you have. It’s hurting your productivity, focus, and ability to get things done. But the deeper cause of this could be rooted from not being as connected with the people important in your life.

    The point here is, instead of cutting out a bad habit completely (i.e. quitting social media), the more realistic and effective thing to do is to replace it with a positive habit (i.e. calling your best friend or family member once a day to feel more connected).

    How To Break Bad Habits

    Let’s dig deeper into how to break bad habits. Before you move on to the next section, try to come up with one bad habit that you’re trying to eliminate in your life. This leads us to our first point:

    Become Hyper-Aware Of Your Bad Habit

    The natural thing to do is ignore our bad habit behaviors and hope they will vanish eventually. But according to James Claiborn, a psychologist and co-author of The Habit Change Workbook: How To Break Bad Habits and Form Good Ones, the opposite is true. We should increase our awareness of these bad behaviors.

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    “One of the things I’m likely to suggest is some sort of record keeping — it may take the form of making a checklist to find out how often you’re doing things and under what circumstances you’re doing them,” he said. “We need to understand the behavior before we can change it effectively.”

    “What gets measured, gets improved.” — Robin Sharma

    Just like you would measure and track your progress at the gym to improve your results, you should do the same to improve your habits.

    Get Rid Of The Bad Triggers

    Triggers (or cues) are what start the habit loops in the first place. In order to eliminate a bad habit, we need get rid of the triggers causing them.

    If you want to stop drinking, then don’t go to the bar. If you want to stop eating junk food, then throw it all out. If you want to stop going on social media, download a web blocker app like Facebook News feed Eradicator (plus you’ll get some awesome quotes with it).

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      Relying on our human willpower can only take us so far. If your environment is making it harder for you to break your bad habits, it only makes sense to change your environment.

      “The more you manage your environment, the more likely you are to succeed.” — Art Markman, professor of psychology at University of Texas

      Replace Your Bad Habit With A Positive Habit

      Eliminating a bad habit alone is not enough. You must take steps to replace it with a positive habit.

      Since stress and boredom are the two leading causes of how a bad habit forms, it’s natural for our brain to crave the bad habit again if we have nothing else to do.

      We need to plan ahead of time what we will do to substitute the bad habit that will instead serve us.

      Instead of going back to the bar, we can pick up a new skill to fill the time, like re-learning a language. After throwing out our junk food, we can take healthy cooking classes or sign up for a gym membership. Instead of going on social media, we can take read more books, take language classes, etc.

      Find An Accountability Partner/Coach

      According to our Ultimate Guide to Learning Anything Faster, there are 5 main reasons why we quit anything:

      1. You run out of time (and quit)
      2. You run out of money (and quit)
      3. You get scared (and quit)
      4. You’re not serious about it (and quit)
      5. You lose interest (and quit)

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        By understanding these reasons before we try to break a bad habit, we can prepare ourselves for the moment when they inevitably happen. More importantly, we can significantly increase the chances of success without giving up by finding someone to keep us accountable.

        Depending on what bad habit you want to break, it may require a professional (i.e. personal trainer, therapist, etc.), or it could just be a close friend who’s there to keep you aligned.

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        Realize You’re Only Human

        We can always hope that you’ll have a perfect record, but it’s more likely that you’ll slip here and there. That’s 100% okay. If you skip a workout, wake up late, indulge your sugar cravings, or miss a language lesson, it’s not the end of the world. It makes you human.

        Instead of beating yourself up for it, forgive yourself. We all make mistakes, even some of the greatest athletes and world-class leaders slip up once in awhile. The important thing is that you get back up and move on. Figure out what made you slip back into the bad habit and plan for success next time.

        That’s all there is to it.

        Next Steps…

        To put this into action, here are some follow-up steps that we recommend you take:

        • First, pick a bad habit that you want to break (self-awareness)
        • Track how many times a day, a week, or a month, that you’re performing this bad habit (gathering data)
        • Try to figure out what triggers the bad habit: a particular time of the day, who you’re with, where you are, etc. (analyzing the data)
        • Select your good habit to replace your bad habit with (i.e. cut out social media and learn a language)

        At the end of the day, learning how to break bad habits is only 10% of the equation. The other 90% comes from taking action and persevering through the difficult struggles that will inevitably come.

        Most people who end up breaking their bad habits have failed multiple times before they made it work. The most important part is that they never gave up. Remember that you may not have immediate success, but if you can forgive yourself quickly and get back up, you’ll figure out how to break bad habits in no time.

        The good news is that once you discover how to break one bad habit, you can break all the other bad habits in your life as well.

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        Last Updated on January 14, 2019

        The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

        The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

        Regardless of whether you hold an entry-level administration role or regularly travel to the ends of the Earth as a hot-shot senior executive, you can still find yourself harboring an emptiness… a feeling that something is missing. A popular assumption that experiencing job satisfaction and a successful career should be underpinned by a well-rounded suite of tangible benefits, no longer holds true for many of us.

        We’d never deny health care benefits, appropriate and fair remuneration, bonuses and travel perks in a job package. However, even if served to us on a silver platter, those features can only satiate us to a certain point.

        You might wonder what governs entrepreneurs and start-up business owners to quit their lucrative jobs, essentially look the gift horse in the mouth and kiss such benefits goodbye! There can be an irresistible pull to mastermind a business with products and/or services that serve the greater good of community wider than that constituting their daily existence.

        Even with research showing entrepreneurship to pose greater threats to their mental and physical health, this unique breed of individuals choose to go against the grain in chasing their dreams of being their own boss. Why? Why would anyone risk this type of career suicide?

        Whether you’re an employee, have recently taken the leap to being a business owner or been in business for a while, the commonality is a congenital condition we all share as human beings; to feel a sense of purpose, value and contribution to our community. Despite it being harder to find this for ourselves in today’s world, these approaches will help you achieve ultimate satisfaction through the twists, turns and joyrides that are essential features of shaping a successful career.

        1. Search for Opportunities That Feed Your Passion, Not Temporary Excitement

        Even though well-intended, the ‘feel good now’ compass that career coaches and consultants often recommend you use to create career satisfaction can actually do you more harm than good. Excitement is transient. It doesn’t last. Passion is the compass you need.

        Passion and excitement are two different things. The resounding career legacy that still draws you to turn up on the job regardless of the sunshine or storm that awaits you…that’s passion. It’s like a mental and/or emotional itch you can’t shrug off. Staying attuned to that calling will breed success for you sooner or later. Patience is key.

        You’re also likely to have more than one key passion. Beware of getting caught in the notion you have to find your one true purpose. In fact, run immediately from any coach who tells you there is only one. There isn’t.

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        Your passion is a journey that can take multiple forms so forget thinking there is the single dream job out there that will give you satisfaction in every way you can imagine. It simply doesn’t exist.

        Consider embracing different roles and projects to help you fuel your passion or fuel your pursuits in finding it. Job satisfaction and your career success will be all the more sweeter from a wider range of enriching experiences.

        2. Don’t Position Job and Career Satisfaction Assessments as Pivotal Guides to Your Success

        Despite their popular use for vocational guidance, assessment tools such as Gallup’s Clifton Strengths and the Myers Briggs Type Indicator have come under fire[1] as being limited to the amount of true value and direction they can offer partakers.[2] These and many other guidance assessment tools (e.g. VIA Character Strengths , DISC ) are self-report questionnaires that don’t have normative population data against which to compare your results.

        Simply remember these tools help you develop a stronger sense of what you identify as strengths and weaknesses within yourself, not in comparison with other people. They will still add insight around what sorts of career opportunities, tasks and projects are going to light your fire, what ones are going to extinguish it and what will prod and keep the coals steadily smoldering.

        3. Be Clear on Your Personal Values, Ethics and Principles and Choose Relationships That Support You Honoring Them

        Teamwork, collaboration, open communication and trust are commonplace for any flourishing work environment. However, whether or not your personal values can be honored in your work can make or break your job satisfaction.

        How committed do you want to be to an organization that expects an average of 10 unpaid overtime hours every week under the guise of ‘reasonable overtime’? Are you willing to accept their construing this expectation as ‘strong commitment’ at the expense of your partner and children waiting at home for you? What are your boundaries concerning when you clock on to their time and when you clock off to yours?

        Being very in tune with what your personal values, principles and ethics are will bid you well in the job satisfaction stakes. Spending time to reflect on experiences and working relationships you’ve had – the good, the bad and the ugly – will help you make well-informed searches and grounded decisions that will propel your career success.

        Finding and nurturing relationships with associates and colleagues who share similar values doesn’t just make your day-to-day pursuits more enjoyable. You become fortunate to work with like-minded people who will support, understand and appreciate you like a second family.

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        Being able to honor your personal values in your work means you will still be able to sleep at night when you have to tread where others fear to, and make extremely difficult decisions others would never ever dream of having to make as you forge success in your career.

        4. Be Clear on Your Own Definition of What Having a Successful Career Means for You

        It’s tempting to get caught up in the ideals and projections of success expressed by those we love, admire and respect. Underneath, we all want on some level to belong to a successful club of some sort.

        With research reporting how much money we feel we need to be truly happy,[3] many of us try to subscribe to the notion that having the car of our dreams or taking a European holiday annually will not bring us happiness. The truth, however, for many of us is these tangible rewards are congratulatory reminders of our persistent efforts to chase our career pursuits.

        If those are things you aspire to, don’t let anyone steal your desire and want to feel deserving of these things, that those are some parameters by which you define your career success.

        Despite consistently being the top revenue earner for two years running, you may not wish to become the sales manager. You may not wish to step out into running your own business even though you consistently excel as an employee, delighting clients and repeatedly receiving glowing testimonials.

        Your definition of career success might be enjoying the predictability of a regular workplace routine. You get to leave – without feeling guilty – at the same time each day, love the people you work with and get to spend a good, uninterrupted amount of work-stress free quality time with your family. That picture is also blissful job satisfaction and complete career success.

        5. Identify the Sorts of Challenges and Problems You Want to Learn to Overcome

        Standard advice you might receive from a career coach might be to look for opportunities where you get to capitalize on exercising your strengths and career-related activities you enjoy.

        However, to become a success at anything involves improvement. To excel at anything often involves stepping outside boundaries and comfort zones where others wouldn’t. This means dedicating focus and attention to things you’re not so good at and things you don’t like.

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        Here’s where working with a coach can be particularly helpful. Map out the experiences that were unsavory in your working history. Were there challenges you opted out of, projects you failed at or toxic relationships that blasted your sense of purpose and self-worth into oblivion? It’s within these experiences that you might just find the most valuable lessons and guiding lights for your trajectory to achieve greater job satisfaction.

        If your natural leadership style is to be a collaborator, finding opportunities that require you to apply a more dictatorial style might be needed. Discussing a secondment or short-term project where you get to develop and test your skills can be a step further in earning contention to lead a larger project down the track.

        With several of the company’s boldest personality types penciled to roll out the operation, you’ll not only develop skills that earn your right to throw your hat in the ring; those key players have an opportunity to see your competence. You can then work on building relationships with those stakeholders before you need to hit the ground running should you win the lead.

        Greater job satisfaction comes with planning and choosing the lessons and opportunities you want to learn, not desperately flailing, floundering and hoping for the best.

        6. Keep Reviewing Your Goal Posts and Be Amenable to Change

        The word ‘career’ is indicative of a longer-term pathway of change, growth and development. The journey is dynamic.

        You will accumulate new skills and let those you no longer need, become rusty. Your intrigue will be stimulated by new experiences, knowledge and people you meet. Your thinking will continue to expand, not shrink. As a result, your goalposts are likely to change.

        A major part of enjoying a successful career is not just setting goals effectively, but regularly reviewing and readjusting them where necessary. However, moving the posts or the target still needs to take place by applying the same processes by which you originally created them. The strength of your emotional connection to those revised goals needs to be the same, if not stronger.

        By asking yourself the following questions, you can assure your developmental and growth trajectory is still on course:

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        • Would working toward these goals still allow me to honor my personal values, principles and ethics at the same capacity if not greater?
        • Do the activities I need to undertake to meet these goals honor my highest priorities?
        • Does this feel right for me and those who are nearest and dearest to me?
        • Is this aligned with my passion?
        • Is chasing this goal a right step for me to take now or is this a detour or distraction which could delay my greater plan?

        Each of your career goals should have different review periods. Whatever you do, stick to the review schedule you set. It will not only keep you focused but help you see your progress (or lack thereof) and allow you to timely re-chart your course before you get too far down the track. You don’t want to waste time haphazardly heading in the wrong direction.

        7. Be Prepared to Let Go

        It can be unfathomable to us as to why others risk leaping into the unknown when everything truly appears fine and dandy in the career realm. The company provided stability, recognition, financial success, interesting projects and the promise of a promotion…what was wrong? Why now jump sideways to run a café or train in another field altogether?

        Nothing may have been wrong at all. It was all going right. It was just the end of a chapter. Perhaps the yearning for the next step is actually taking a different trajectory entirely. You may want to simply experience a different rhythm. Perhaps it’s time to pursue a different passion.

        If you have leaped from employee-land to freelancing or have made the reverse-jump (or you know someone who has), you will have quickly grown a different appreciation for pros and cons each work lifestyle brings. Working for yourself can bring the greater realization of your creativity, whether or not it can be monetized to earn you a living.

        When your customers are buying you or a product you designed and fashioned, there is a direct level of appreciation and gratitude that can elevate your confidence in the way you have never experienced as an employee, regardless of your rank.

        Similarly, there are times where we need to recognize our business ventures were adventures, not long-term life-changing empires. There are times we need to recognize that time is what provides the clearest limitation of how long we persist for in such pursuits.

        We have to recognize the absence of enough financial, mental, emotional and physical breadcrumbs that tells us we’re no longer meant to push in that direction. At least, not for the present time.

        The Bottom Line

        Above all, keep the momentum. As long as you remain committed to pursuing work opportunities that allow you to honor your highest priorities, the truth of who you are and what you stand for, achieving ultimate job satisfaction and a successful career will never be too far away.

        More Resources to Help Advance Your Career

        Featured photo credit: Csaba Balazs via unsplash.com

        Reference

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