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Don’t Panic Next Time When You Shake/Can’t Move During Sleep, Remember This

Don’t Panic Next Time When You Shake/Can’t Move During Sleep, Remember This

Have you found your body shake when you are falling asleep? Have you ever had the unsettling experience of waking up in the middle of the night and finding that you are unable to move? Has this elicited feelings of fear and panic? Let’s take a closer look at what this is, why it happens and how to deal with it without panicking.

First, why your body shakes when you nearly fall asleep?

Neurologists explained when we start to enter the “Slow wave sleep” stage, we experience a separation between brains and muscles so that we won’t move when we dream. So it’s a normal situation that most of us would experience and it’s just like a disconnection performed in our bodies. It doesn’t imply that we have any hidden diseases.

Before we wake up, our minds and muscles will reconnect so it’s also common for us to shake before we wake up.

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Some people would experience an exceptional case where the disconnection occurs earlier than the brain actually falling asleep completely. Then they would panic as they’re conscious but can’t move our bodies. This is called sleep paralysis.

What is sleep paralysis?

Sleep paralysis (SP) may be described as a period of time during which voluntary muscle movement is inhibited, yet you can see, breath and sense as in a waking state. SP can occur when you fall asleep or when you are about to wake up. A characteristic of SP is vivid hallucinations. These can be frightening experiences that have been interpreted and explained as, for example, the results of witchcraft, malevolent spirits and extra-terrestrial visitations.

How does sleep paralysis happen?

Deep sleep or REM sleep is at times suppressed; this can occur for a variety of reasons such as anxiety, trauma, jetlag, unusual sleep patterns or alcohol. When REM sleep is suppressed instead of occurring at the beginning of the night it takes place at the end of the night and this can elicit strange occurrences.

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During REM we experience vivid dreams and, during this period of sleep the body is put into a state of complete paralysis. This is believed to prevent us from performing our dreams and is a completely normal occurrence. Sometimes, however, things don’t go according to plan and you can wake up during the REM period while your body is still paralyzed.

Who suffers from sleep paralysis?

Around 8% of the general population, 28% of students and 32% of psychiatric patients have experienced SP at least once, according to various studies. The reason that SP occurs at a higher rate in psychiatric patients and students is somewhat unclear but it is thought that it may be because both groups experience regular sleep disturbances; an occurrence that makes SP more likely.

SP has been linked with conditions such as narcolepsy, hypertension and seizure disorders, but it is also associated with sleep disturbances, a general lack of sleep, jet lag and shift work.

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Why some people see strange things during sleep paralysis?

SP experiences can be very frightening. Cheyne et al. discovered that 90% of a student sample and 98% of a web-based sample said that they felt fear. Clinically significant levels of fear were found in 69% of a psychiatric sample taken by Sharpless et al. These high levels of fear sharply contrast the fear felt by people when they experience regular dreams. During normal dreaming fear occurs 30% of the time.

Brian Sharpless, a clinical psychologist at Washington State University and author of the book, Sleep Paralysis: Historical, Psychological, and Medical Perspectives says: “I had one patient who was lying in bed and woke up to see a little vampire girl with blood coming out of her mouth,” he continues by saying “This is an example of a really vivid, multi-sensory hallucination. She could feel this vampire figure grabbing onto her arms, pulling her, and saying she was going to drag her to hell and do all these terrible things to her.”

Anxiety levels are high when people experience SP. Sharpless explains: “You have this vague sense that there’s something in the room with you.” Often people have the unnerving feeling that someone is watching them.

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The brain is confused and urgently tries to make sense of the different signals it is getting. It uses cultural beliefs and memories and applies them to the situation of SP. Baland Jalal, a neuroscientist at the University of California says  “Adding original features, scenarios or stories to try and make sense of what you’re experiencing is a very human thing to do”. He explains that “this is why people see ghosts, demons, aliens or even figments from their past appearing to attack them.”

The fear that comes with SP is not only derived from the fact that one feels paralyzed but also from the hallucinatory content that accompanies the paralysis. Unnatural involuntary movements, the presence of malevolent intruders and psychical or sexual assaults are frequently experienced during an SP episode.

How to avoid sleep paralysis

Psychologists offer some suggestions that may help deal with SP. These tips include trying to establish a more regular sleep cycle and not sleeping on your back or stomach. “People are statistically less likely to have it, if they sleep on their side,” Sharpless says. “We think there’s something about the extra weight when we’re in a supine position that makes it more likely.”

Summation

Next time you experience SP try to remember why it is happening. Thinking about the physical reasons for this phenomena may help you manage your SP experience better and stop you from becoming too frightened by it.

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Rebecca Beris

Rebecca is a wellness and lifestyle writer at Lifehack.

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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