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If You Think Promptly Answering A Question Makes You Look Smart, Read This

If You Think Promptly Answering A Question Makes You Look Smart, Read This

Is one of your greatest fears speaking in public? Or having all eyes on you? Maybe it’s being asked a question you weren’t prepared for?

Many of us feel that when we are asked questions directly, we are not clever or smart enough if we do not immediately have an answer. We might feel cornered, flustered, or we might feel as if the right thing to do is to give the questioner what they need as quickly as possible.

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Common responses to being questioned are nervousness, stammering, turning red, a general fear of how we will be received, and a discomfort in being suddenly put on the spot. Asking questions of a person, however, is not only about the answer they give but also a way to identify their character. There is an art to questioning. Response time, along with how you respond, is all part of the approach. So, here are a few thing to remember.

You Don’t Have To Answer Immediately

Contrary to popular belief, we do not have to answer questions immediately. There is another way! If you are feeling nervous or are stumbling, try practicing techniques that will allow some time for your brain to catch up and allow you to say what you really mean. Remember, there is more than one way to skin a cat, and there is more than one way to answer a question. As people feel they are having their question answered, your duty is accomplished. Giving a seemingly wise response, even after time, is better than giving an immediate silly answer out of fear. When you begin to understand the art of questioning, you better understand what to do when it comes to being under fire. 

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Those Who Ask Difficult Questions May Not Want A Direct Answer

When you are questioned, the sought-after response may not be typical of an exam-style Q and A. Your answer to the question may be more in the realm of communication and conversation, and so your answer need not be a direct response to the question itself. The question should be considered and responded to with your own personal charm — if you can manage it. A tactful, considered response is more valuable than what you might initially think the questioner wants to hear. They are considering you and sizing you up with the things they are asking. Know how to improvise. Learn how to gently maneuver your enquirer by using a few tricks.

Tricks And Tips

Ask them to repeat the question.

This will give you time if nothing else. It’s the number one trick in the book. If that fails…

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Reflect the question with a question.

Ask the enquirer something about the question to again give you some time, but also to give you more information if you are unclear about the discussion.

Ask for clarification of the question, or the definition of the question.

(Eg. “Can you tell me what you mean by …”) This can often throw the enquirer and give you even more time to assert yourself and clarify your own meaning. If the question is vague, you can also…

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Take initiative and clarify the point yourself.

Perhaps the questioner asked you something about failure, to which you could reply “If by failing, you mean …” and then interpret it as you see fit.

Allow yourself a small pause.

This is another great trick, but be careful not to start in with “um” and “ah” — this will only make you sound vague and insipid and won’t help your cause of being witty and charming at all.

Redirect the question

Send it back to them. This is a last attempt, but sometimes an effective one. For example, if someone asks if you are in a relationship, ask them then if they are in a relationship. It will even out the playing field if their initial idea was to throw you off guard.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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