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7 Ways Sharing Your Story Will Change Your Life

7 Ways Sharing Your Story Will Change Your Life

There are certain stories that unite us all.

Through telling stories, we feel connection, and similarity. Oddly enough, we can also define and create our stories through our own uniqueness. No one else can write the story of our life – it’s what makes us unique, yet we all can relate to certain themes and feelings. When we tell our story, we are asking for attention from those we care about or wish to affect.

So, why are stories so important? It is incredibly important because sharing your story can change your life.

Breath
    Photo Credit: Amy Oestreicher via www.amyoes.com

    Telling our stories helps us process what happens in our lives. Through our shared experience, we can heal. It’s not the details that matter – suffering is relative. By sharing our stories, we can connect with others who feel the same way. We suddenly feel less alone in our ever-unfolding narrative.

    You don’t have to be a book author, a storyteller, or a Chatty Cathy to tell your story. Here are seven ways to start sharing your story.

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    1.) Make a mantra

    When the weather’s beautiful out, I love taking nature walks and reciting this mantra to myself:

    Breathe in experience, breathe out your story.

    Breathe in, and when you exhale, ask yourself what truth you are aching to express today.

    Floating-Girl
      Photo credit: Amy Oestreicher

      2.) Read a children’s book

      Does anyone remember the book It Looked Like Spilt Milk? The pages are simply filled with white splotches – clouds. It’s up to you to decide what shapes these “clouds” are taking. Children’s books make stories out of anything – even white splotches! There’s nothing like a kid’s book to get your mind thinking like a storyteller. Pick a good kiddie read and find the adventure in your own life.

      3.) Write a line a day

      This little book is the best investment I made. For me, the idea of “journaling” every day is daunting. Will I really have time to commit? This is a little journal where there’s literally only room for ONE line – and it’s for five years! It makes me a bit teary-eyed looking back on mine. I’m on “Year Four” already. If I go to the very first entry, it’s after a terrible surgery. The next year, I’m performing a one-woman musical about that terrible surgery. The next year, I met a guy online. The next year, I’m his wife!

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      I can’t recommend a “Line A Day” journal enough. It’s your story… in time-lapse mode!

      4.) Find your story-song

      What am I talking about? Have you ever heard a song on the radio that really resonated with you, or with a certain time in your life? Did one song remind you of a terrible break up, or your first kiss, or that party you just couldn’t stop dancing at? Today, find that song and share it. Tada! Story shared.

      5.) Send a card – just because

      Snail-mail. Remember that? I love sending cards because; well, they give me an excuse to write! With a pen?!. How old fashioned. Today, send a card to a friend, just because. Thank them for the impact they’ve made on your life – big or small. In doing so, you’ll share with them how they’ve become part of your story. Connections make our stories stronger!

      6.) Be in the moment

      You don’t always know you’re telling a story as you’re living it. If you center yourself in the present moment, a story may unfold right before your eyes!

      Here’s the trick to being in the moment by way of a clever mantra: Awareness Without Judgment.

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      Notice every physical sensation in your body. Have a chat with what I like to call “My Five Superheroes“:  taste, touch, sight, sound, and smell. Think I’m crazy? I call them my “superheroes“ because they save me in the nick of time when I’m about to get lost in anxious thoughts. When I start worrying or pitying myself, I call on these rock stars before I can think one more thought.

      Quick! At this very second, name the first thing you…

      • Smell
      • See
      • Touch
      • Taste (it can be air!)
      • Hear

      Just start with those five physical sensations, and watch your story take shape. You have a story within you. You just have to be present so you can hear it.

      7.) Talk

      Simple, I know; however, speech is healing – and not always as easy as it seems. When we talk about what has happened in or lives, we use our voices to claim ownership over what has happened to us.

      So, go on.. tell your story!

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      Dance-to-the-Rhythm-of-the-Universe
        Photo Credit: Amy Oestreicher

        Conclusion

        Why should you share your story?

        The more stories we hear about turning an obstacle into an opportunity, the more empowered we are to transform our own lives and have confidence that when life actually does surprise us, we’re capable of getting through anything.

        Think that no one can relate to your story?

        That’s the beauty of a metaphor; through a larger vision, we can relate with our own unique stories. You never know who your story might affect, and that is the special super power of storytelling. Everyone’s story is different, but we all can relate to emotions. If you’re human, you’ve felt sadness, hunger, pain, joy,  and loss. It’s not the specifics that tug at our heart strings, it’s how we overcome them. We share our dreams, fears, successes, and losses in order to create the triumphant stories that make up our world.

        What story will you share today?

        Photo Credits: Amy Oestreicher via amyoes.com

        Featured photo credit: Amy Oestreicher via amyoes.com

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        Published on October 7, 2019

        4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

        4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

        Can a person really be toxic? Well, a toxic person does not refer to those who are affected by the virus or toxic. To be precise, toxic people are those who are very unsupportive, abusive and unhealthy in nature. Their behavior is filled with venom and you will not feel any sort of gentle breeze in their words.

        In this article, you will learn how to spot out a toxic person, and what you can do to deal with them.

        Signs of Toxic People

        To make it more obvious, I have added some signs of toxic people below.

        Manipulative Behavior And Fabricated Mind

        Toxic people are unable to deal with the bitter truth firmly. If you are going to blurt out their fabrications with proof, they will try to change the whole matter with their manipulative behavior. They will titillate you with sensitive words or they will try to frighten you to get rid of the problems.

        Inhuman And Merciless in Nature

        We know that sharing our thoughts with friends will keep us in good mental state. But, if you are not getting fruitful outcomes, you have to understand that you are spending time with toxic friends.

        Toxic people do not know how to put themselves in other’s shoes. They just put on a mask of simplicity. But, in reality, they don’t have feelings for you. Therefore, you should stop sharing your valuable time with them as you will get nothing except annoyance and silence.

        Hypocrisy at Its Best in Their Nature

        Toxic people have a great hunger for respect, adoration, and fidelity. After dignifying them with these valuable elements, you will get nothing; you will be cheated, manipulated and criticized by them. And, if you are not willing to listen to them, you will be controlled by guilt-tripping.

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        Emotional Outburst And Pathological Excuses

        Toxic people always want to see themselves in the positive end. Therefore, to get their job done, they always have an emotional outburst and emotional excuse to make an impulsive impression upon you.

        We do mistakes and it is our duty to accept those mistakes. But, toxic people have their own rules, they have a tendency to present themselves rationally even after committing a mistake. If someone tries to expose themselves with facts, they show no embarrassment and use emotional excuses as a shield.

        Play with Your Emotion And Gradually Erode It

        Toxic people always try to condescend you with critical jokes and when you try to elicit your thoughts, they just burst out laughing. Teasing becomes an important element in your relationship with toxic person. They even give you backhanded compliments to belittle you.

        Thus, using their toxic mindset, they just gradually diminish your abilities as well as intelligence. And you will have nothing left in your hand other than putting up with these things to maintain the silence.

        Well, you probably might have not seen all these signs in one person as there are different types of toxic people roaming around you.

        4 Types of Toxic People

        To understand it better, I’m mentioning the different types of toxic people here.

        1. Conversational Narcissist

        There are some toxic people who do not know how to give importance to others. They will talk about themselves but never ask you about your condition; they will only recall you when they need you or they are facing some sort of problems.

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        2. Emotional Vampires

        These vampires do not suck your blood but dissipate your emotion. They always talk negatively about everyone and compel you to think in the same pattern that they follow. They mask themselves in such a way in front of you that you gradually start giving importance to them. But, ultimately, you will not get any positive outcome from them.

        3. Monsters with Green eyes

        As discussed earlier, toxic people will give you backhanded compliments. Basically, these are called monsters with green eyes. These monsters feel happy when you feel sad. Therefore, they will always try to belittle your achievements, intelligence, and strengths. Along with it, they give compliments with some negativity in it.

        4. Black-Eyed Cats

        These cats always do mew-mew and try to control everything around them. They love to be pampered but, they do not like if someone goes against them.

        If you are in a relationship with such persons, you will be nagged until you are giving them complete satisfaction. In a nutshell, it must be said that you have to align yourself with them if you want to live with them. But, ultimately, you will lose your mental, conversational and emotional freedom.

        How to Deal with Toxic People

        Living with problems is more convenient than living with toxic people. But, toxic people are parasites and therefore, you will see these monsters rambling around you wherever you go.

        However, if you know how to deal with them, it would be very helpful for you and your life would be much easier to live. We have added some tips to assist you, just check these out.

        Get Rid of Intermittent Reinforcement

        We are very optimistic in nature and over the time, this optimism has reached to such a level that we can happily put up with the ‘close losses’ instead of trying to catch the ‘near wins’.

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        B.F Skinner once did an experiment with three rats. He put them in different cages attached with levers. The lever delivered food when it was pressed. In the 1st cage, the lever always delivered food when the rat pressed it. In case of the 2nd cage, food was never delivered by the lever even after pressing it, therefore, the rat understood the lesson and never tried to get food. But, in the third cage, the lever delivered food randomly and as a result, the rat was completely hooked and fixated. He constantly pushed it but didn’t get the food always.

        Well, this is called intermittent relationship and the same thing happens in human relationships where toxic people give you intermittent reinforcement and your heart gets pumped up with optimism. As a result, you will be hooked and your life will be fixated at some point with toxic people.

        You should learn to move on without them and live your life happily because random happiness cannot bring permanent relief.

        Never Make Too Many Allowances And Pardons

        Well, sympathetic attitude is very good and it is also a fact that sometimes toxic people suffer from genuine depression, physical as well as mental illness. But, you have to set a boundary and you cannot allow people to get away with anything so easily.

        If you make too many allowances as well as pardons, it would not be good for you in the long-term. Yes, there are some people who are facing extreme hardships and they are not even toxic in nature. But, all you can do is show some genuine compassion keeping yourself within the boundaries.

        Always Try to Ignore Their Toxic Traps

        Demotivational words are the primary weapon that they frequently use in their implications to detract you. Along with this, they throw words in such a way that you start feeling guilty. Well, you must understand that these are just toxic traps and you should not step on it.

        Always remember that you will have full access to freedom if you stop taking things personally. They not only do this with you but also with everyone. You just have to keep in mind that these toxic words are not based on truth but on their own mental reproduction. So, you just have to ignore this and focus on your work.

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        Show Them Your Beautiful Smile Not the Curves on Your Forehead

        Toxic people have an aptitude to attack mentally, mock disgracefully and diminish shamefully. But, you will not be affected if you don’t surrender yourself. Show them that you are not getting belittled or insulted.

        We all have our problems and we also know that we are capable of solving these problems. Therefore, the matter entirely depends upon us and if we don’t allow these vampires to enter into our life or play with our emotions, they cannot suck our happiness. So, I’d suggest you show your beautiful smile when they buzz around you.

        Don’t Suppress Yourself

        Toxic people will intimidate, bully, pass guilt, and forcefully take money from you to get their job done. They know very well that they are doing wrong and at the same time, they are acquainted with the concept that we are incapable of doing anything against them.

        Most of the time, we keep ourselves quiet until someone speaks up. And because of this suppressive mindset, we are gradually being dragged into their mind games.

        Well, we have to change this concept as it infuses courage into them. We need to obstruct them with firm minds and make them realize the negative consequences of their behavior.[1] If they are upsetting you, just tell them directly. Your direct statement might open a new gate of opportunity that will allow you to help them if they are suffering from genuine problems.

        So, why are you still tolerating these toxic people? Follow the tips mentioned above and deal with them in the right way.

        Featured photo credit: Devin Avery via unsplash.com

        Reference

        [1] Tips for Grooming: Change Your Fixed Negative Belief

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