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7 Fashion Tips That Will Make You The Center of the Room

7 Fashion Tips That Will Make You The Center of the Room

Sometimes, you might just want to fit in with everyone else’s style. But there are other times when you want everyone’s eyes on you. You want to stand out. For those occasions, you need some interesting styles that will make you look great and a bit different from everyone else. If you want to be the center of attention, try one of these looks on for size.

1. Play Fast and Loose

One of the simplest ways to easily turn your look into something noteworthy is to make it clash a little. While clashing doesn’t mean using opposing patterns or colors (we’ll get to that later), you can easily create a unique look by wearing a loose-fitting article along with something more tight-fitting. A common use of this style is to wear skinny jeans along with a bulkier top. For men, this might be a puffy jacket and for women this could be a loose dress over leggings.

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2. Use Unique Materials Sparingly

Cotton isn’t the only material, you know. Nothing adds a bit of mystique such as using an uncommonly-worn material. But before you start going all-leather, remember to use it only sparingly, as you would with an accessory. During the cooler months, consider something a little off the beaten path, such as a wool sweater, or in the warmer months, a silk dress.

3. Be Smart With Your Color Choices

Color plays a huge part in fashion. There are rules about color, such as you should use them sparingly, but you know what they say – rules were meant to be broken. While most peoples’s go-tos use mostly neutral colors, it’s good for you to have a few outfits that burst with color. To make your outfit really pop, consider going with two bold complementary colors, such as orange and blue.

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4. Play With Symmetry

Good fashion requires a sense of symmetry, but great fashion uses small doses of asymmetry. While you want your outfit as a whole to balance, too much balance is boring. Your idea of asymmetry can be as subtle as a sensible watch or wristband worn on one wrist. Or, you can be a little more conspicuous by wearing an oblique skirt that covers a bit more of one leg than the other. A little imbalance stimulates the eye and makes those around you look twice.

5. Use Accessories Intelligently

Speaking of watches and wristbands, accessories can be a great way to make you stand out from the rest of the crowd. There’s a happy medium to be found in accessories: the whole trick is to make them an interesting piece of your ensemble, but on the other hand, you don’t want to make them overly noticeable.

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For women, an oversized belt can be a great accessory to color coordinate with the rest of the outfit. And for men, something like a tie pin or an interesting watch can cause a pleasant surprise when it’s finally noticed.

6. Interesting Patterns

Patterns play with a few fashion qualities, as they blend colors and symmetry all at once. Picking an uncommon pattern can be a great way to get all the eyes on you. We’re not talking about overplayed patterns such as plaid and floral. Instead, consider color blocks and geometric patterns with bright, contrasting colors. These patterns are fashionable, yet not very popular, so they’ll give you a familiar, yet still unique, style.

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7. Wear a Piece from Another Culture

If you really want to stand out, consider putting on something that your crowd isn’t used to seeing. In this case, making use of fashion from another culture can show your refined tastes and worldly knowledge of fashion styles. For example, Anarkali Salwar suits, which are popular in India, can give off a sense of formality while still allowing you to express yourself through bold colors and elegant form.

Featured photo credit: Clothing Tips via lifehack.org

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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