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25 Reasons Why It Is Great to Be Single (While Everyone Around is in a Relationship)

25 Reasons Why It Is Great to Be Single (While Everyone Around is in a Relationship)

Whoever said being single sucks didn’t know how to be single. Being single is great, which is why a majority of the U.S. population currently is.

Being in a relationship can be comforting and attractive and it can teach you a lot about love. But it can also limit you. Being single, on the other hand, opens up a whole world of freedom you never even knew existed. Stop worrying that you are still single, and instead embrace the positive sides of your life situation.

Here are 25 reasons being single rocks when all your friends are tied down.

1. You can flirt all you want.

If you practice enough, flirting can become one of your most treasured pastimes.

2. Going out has endless possibilities.

We’ve all had that friend who got into a relationship and was never seen again.

Going out isn’t as much fun when you’re committed. When you’re single, going out is a whole different story! And it usually involves a happy ending.

3. The only person you have to check in with is your mother.

And even my mother doesn’t care as much about what I’m doing as some of my ex-girlfriends. 

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4. You can still enjoy the wonders of dating apps.

One word: TINDER.

5. You never have to clear your browsing history.

Which gives you time for more important things, like binge watching Game of Thrones.

6. You can take up the whole bed any night of the week.

What I miss most when I’m in a relationship are my bed sheets.

Let’s face it, partners hog the bed and when you call them out for it they always have some lame excuse like, “I was trying to snuggle.” I don’t want to snuggle, woman! I want my bed back.

7. You can’t argue with a boyfriend/girlfriend when you don’t have one.

Isn’t it just the best feeling when you’re out having a grand old time, drinking beer, hitting on anything that walks, and you look over to see a couple fighting? That’s sweet success, my single friends.

8. You can watch Beyonce’s visual album Lemonade without worrying whether you, yourself, are being cheated on.

I think it’s safe to say that we’ve all seen Beyonce’s newest claim to fame. We’ve seen it, we’ve talked about it, we’ve probably even tweeted about it. The final consensus seems to be that nobody in a relationship feels safe. If the Queen Bee is being cheated on, I’m screwed!

9. You don’t have to plan a wedding.

Weddings are only awesome when all you did was show up. I have been to my fair share of weddings, and I’m convinced that the person who has the most fun is never the bride, nor the groom.

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It’s the single guests who are mingling with a bunch of people they’ve never met before (and will probably never see again) and ordering drinks from an open bar. It’s no wonder that one in four Millennials have taken marriage off the table.

10. If you’re not thinking about marriage, you certainly don’t have to worry about divorce.

Enough said.

11. You can be anyone you want on any given day.

When you’re in a relationship, you can’t pretend to be someone you’re not. You’ll be busted immediately.

12. You don’t have to wonder if you’re with the right person.

If you’re anything like me, every person you’ve ever dated has become a question of your own identity.

And if you’re anything like me, your answer to a friend asking whether he’s with the right girl is always, “If you have to ask, dump her.”

13. You never have to do anything you don’t feel like doing.

This includes going shopping, seeing a movie with Liam Hemsworth in it, or having sex with the same person over and over.

14. You don’t have to smell someone else’s farts.

Unless you have friends like mine. Let me rephrase this. You don’t have to smell someone else’s farts and feel obligated to sleep with them later.

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15. You don’t have to share your meals.

Yes, I am going to eat all of my fries. Thank you very much.

16. You don’t have to hangout with your girlfriend or boyfriend’s annoying friends.

You only have to hang out with your own friends’ annoying girlfriends or boyfriends. I’ll take this option any day.

17. You can watch whatever you want after work.

No more Real Housewives of whatever city. No more sports game you don’t care about. Score!

18. You know you haven’t settled.

What’s worse than being alone? Settling for someone horrible because you don’t want to be alone.

19. You have time to work on yourself.

The periods of my life in which I have grown and accomplished the most on a personal level are the same periods of time that I was single. Coincidence? I think not.

I know people in dead-end, long-term relationships that have completely lost their drive and forgotten their passions. Being single gives you the time necessary to pursue your own dreams.

20. You can be completely selfish.

While all your friends complain about how they have to do this or that for their significant others, you can do whatever you want.

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21. You can experiment.

Sexually or scientifically, you decide.

22. You can travel.

If you want to get the experience of traveling by yourself, it’s better when you’re single. You don’t have to call your girlfriend to tell her where you’re going next month. You don’t have to worry about your boyfriend being offended that you didn’t invite him, or asking what you’re doing every step of the trip.

23. You save money.

Dating is expensive. Holidays are expensive. Love has a price tag.

24. Life is more adventurous.

Period.

25. You still have the excitement of finding the one.

Sure, everyone around you has already found the one, or at least they think they have. But the search is not over for you, and that’s thrilling.

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Last Updated on April 6, 2020

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

Most discussions on positively influencing others eventually touch on Dale Carnegie’s seminal work, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written more than 83 years ago, the book touches on a core component of human interaction, building strong relationships. It is no wonder why.

Everything that we do hinges on our ability to connect with others and formulate deep relationships. You cannot sell a house, buy a house, advance in most careers, sell a product, pitch a story, teach a course, etc. without building healthy relationships. Managers get the best results from their teams, not through brute force, but to careful appeals to their sensibilities, occasional withdrawals from the reservoir of respect they’ve built. Using these tactics, they can influence others to excellence, to productivity, and to success.

Carnegie’s book is great. Of course, there are other resources too. Most of us have someone in our lives who positively influences us. The truth is positively influencing people is about centering the humanity of others. Chances are, you know someone who is really good at making others feel like stars. They can get you to do things that the average person cannot. Where the requests of others sound like fingernails on a chalkboard, the request from this special person sounds like music to your ears. You’re delighted to not only listen but also to oblige.

So how to influence people in a positive way? Read on for tips.

1. Be Authentic

To influence people in a positive way, be authentic. Rather than being a carbon copy of someone else’s version of authenticity, uncover what it is that makes you unique.

Discover your unique take on an issue and then live up to and honor that. Once of the reasons social media influencers are so powerful is that they have carved out a niche for themselves or taken a common issue and approached it from a novel or uncommon way. People instinctually appreciate people whose public persona matches their private values.

Contradictions bother us because we crave stability. When someone professes to be one way, but lives contrary to that profession, it signals that they are confused or untrustworthy and thereby, inauthentic. Neither of these combinations bode well for positively influencing others.

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2. Listen

Growing up, my father would tell me to listen to what others said. He told me if I listened carefully, I would know all I needed to know about a person’s character, desires and needs.

To positively influence others, you must listen to what is spoken and what is left unsaid. Therein lies the explanation for what people need in order to feel validated, supported and seen. If a person feels they are invisible, and unseen by their superiors, they are less likely to be positively influenced by that person.

Listening meets a person’s primary need of validation and acceptance.

Take a look at this guide on how to be a better listener: How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

3. Become an Expert

Most people are predisposed to listen to, if not respect, authority. If you want to positively influence others, become an authority in the area in which you seek to lead others. Research and read everything you can about the given topic, and then look for opportunities to put your education into practice.

You can argue over opinions. You cannot argue, or it is unwise to argue, over facts and experts come with facts.

4. Lead with Story

From years of working in the public relations space, I know that personal narratives, testimonials and impact stories are incredibly powerful. But I never cease to be amazed with how effective a well-timed and told story can be.

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If you want to influence people, learn to tell stories. Your stories should be related to the issue or concept you are discussing. They should be an analogy or metaphor that explains your topic in ordinary terms and in vivid detail. To learn more about how to tell powerful stories, and the ethics of storytelling, take a look at this article: How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

5. Lead by Example

It is incredibly inspiring to watch passionate, talented people at work or play. One of the reasons a person who is not an athlete can be in awe of athletic prowess is because human nature appreciates the extraordinary. When we watch the Olympics, Olympic trials, gymnastic competitions, ice skating, and other competitive sports, we can recognize the effort of people who day in and day out give their all. C

ase in point: Simone Biles. The gymnast extraordinaire won her 6TH all-around title at the U.S. Gymnastics Championships after doing a triple double. She was the first woman to do so. Watching her gave me chills. Even non-gymnasts and non-competitive athletes can appreciate the talent required to pull off such a remarkable feat.

We celebrate remarkable accomplishments and believe that their example is proof that we too can accomplish something great, even if it isn’t qualifying for the Olympics. To influence people in a positive way, we must lead by example, lead with intention and execute with excellence.

6. Catch People Doing Good

A powerful way to influence people in a positive way is to catch people doing good. Instead of looking for problems, look for successes. Look for often overlooked, but critically important things that your peers, subordinates and managers do that make the work more effective and more enjoyable.

Once you catch people doing good, name and notice their contributions.

7. Be Effusive with Praise

It did not take me long to notice a remarkable trait of a former boss. He not only began and ended meetings with praise, but he peppered praise throughout the entire meeting. He found a way to celebrate the unique attributes and skills of his team members. He was able to quickly and accurately assess what people were doing well and then let them and their colleagues know.

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Meetings were not just an occasion to go through a “To Do” list, they were opportunities to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small they are.

8. Be Kind Rather Than Right

I am going to level with you; this one is tough. It is easy to get caught up in a cycle of proving oneself. For people who lack confidence, or people who prioritize the opinions of others, being right is important. The validation that comes with being perceived as “right” feeds one’s ego. But in the quest to be “right,” we can hurt other people. Once we’ve hurt someone by being unkind, it is much harder to get them to listen to what we’re trying to influence them to do.

The antidote to influencing others via bullying is to prioritize kindness above rightness. You can be kind and still stand firm in your position. For instance, many people think that they need others to validate their experience. If a person does not see the situation you experienced in the way you see it, you get upset. But your experience is your experience.

If you and your friends go out to eat and you get food poisoning, you do not need your friends to agree that the food served at the restaurant was problematic for you. Your own experience of getting food poisoning is all the validation you need. Therefore, taking time to be right is essentially wasted and, if you were unkind in seeking validation for your food-poison experience, now you’ve really lost points.

9. Understand a Person’s Logical, Emotional and Cooperative Needs

The Center for Creative Leadership has argued that the best way to influence others is to appeal to their logical, emotional and cooperative needs. Their logical need is their rational and educational need. Their emotional need is the information that touches them in a deeply personal manner. The cooperative need is understanding the level of cooperation various individuals need and then appropriately offering it.

The trick with this system is to understand that different people need different things. For some people, a strong emotional appeal will outweigh logical explanations. For others, having an opportunity to collaborate will override emotional connection.

If you know your audience, you will know what they need in order to be positively influenced. If you have limited information about the people whom you are attempting to influence, you will be ineffective.

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10. Understand Your Lane

If you want to positively influence others, operate from your sphere of influence. Operate from your place of expertise. Leave everything else to others. Gone are the days when being a jack of all trades is celebrated.

Most people appreciate brands that understand their target audience and then deliver on what that audience wants. When you focus on what you are uniquely gifted and qualified to do, and then offer that gift to the people who need it, you are likely more effective. This effectiveness is attractive.

You cannot positively influence others if you are more preoccupied by what others do well versus what you do well.

Final Thoughts

Influencing people is about centering your humanity. If you want to influence others positively, focus on the way you communicate and improve the relationship with yourself first.

It’s hard to influence others if you’re still trying to figure out how to communicate with yourself.

More Tips About Making Influence

Featured photo credit: Wonderlane via unsplash.com

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