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5 Rules To Find Your Dream Partner Without Even Looking

5 Rules To Find Your Dream Partner Without Even Looking

Thousands of single men and women around the world all dream of the day they meet that special person. Someone who excites us, makes us smile and brings vibrant colour to their lives. For some, this leads to feelings of loneliness, desperation or even hopelessness. Yet, there is absolutely no use in letting this get the better of you.

Searching for secret methods nor secret locations of where they may be hiding is fruitless. The best approach is to open your life and allow the man/woman of your dreams to enter, using these five simple rules:

Rule #1 – Stop Searching For “The One”

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    That’s right, you must stop looking in order to find them… Unfortunately, desperately seeking out your perfect partner just doesn’t work. In almost all cases, these special people enter our lives completely unintentionally. But when they do, you will  know it!

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    Also, if you dedicate yourself to finding someone now, you’re likely to settle for less. While prowling out on the town is fun, let’s be honest, it’s highly unlikely you will hunt down “the one”!

    While you call off the search, you must always remain open to receiving them.

    Rule #2 – Focus on Yourself

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      Now you are no longer focused on finding another, transfer this energy into working on yourself. Occupying yourself with personal improvement will have three huge benefits:

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      1. You will be happier, more confident and independent. Incidentally, this will magnetize others
      2. You will be the best possible version of yourself for when you do meet someone special
      3. Staying productive will prevent loneliness, desperation or negative feelings of lacking

      Follow your individual calling, it may include a number of the following aspects:

      • Building a business or career
      • Improving health/fitness
      • Pursuing interests/hobby’s
      • Competing in events or competitions
      • Travelling and exploring new places

      During this process, you may just stumble across someone special, so keep your eyes open!

      Rule #3 – Compliment Not Complete

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        Now that you are well-focused and independent, you will no longer feel you a partner to complete you. Instead, focus on identifying someone who compliments you perfectly, and you to them.

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        If either person needs the other to bring happiness, balance or peace to their life, it is often a recipe for disaster. In most cases this will result in an unstable relationship, far from the dream boat ride you hoped for!

        Rule #4 – Be Social and Outgoing

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          For those who still think this rule is corny, have you heard of the six degrees of separation? It’s an incredible theory that we are all only six steps or fewer away from any other person you will ever meet. So that “a friend of a friend” chain between you and your dream partner is only six steps or less!

          Go out and mingle at events, festivals, parties, or gatherings. Make sure you chose something that interests you, or simply go for fun with your friends! You’re bound to meet lots of new interesting people, possibly even cross paths with someone special.

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          Rule #5 – Be Bold – Act On Your Intuition

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            While you are not actively searching for your dream partner, you cannot assume that they are going to simply fall straight onto your lap! You need to trust your intuition to tell you when to act.

            When you meet someone who resonates with you deeply, don’t let them slip away! It’s up to you to control your destiny, to act and explore life’s many possibilities. Harness the power of the butterfly effect, small actions can change your entire life.

            It may be as simple as exchanging smiles with a beautiful stranger. Even just walking over to casually introduce yourself could reveal the amazing discovery you were always longing for!

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            The Gentle Art of Saying No

            The Gentle Art of Saying No

            No!

            It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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            But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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            What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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            But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

            1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
            2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
            3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
            4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
            5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
            6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
            7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
            8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
            9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
            10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

            Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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