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3 Things Extroverted Introverts Wish People Knew

3 Things Extroverted Introverts Wish People Knew

Let’s have a talk about extroverted introverts. We exist.

Would you rather have a night out on the town or cuddle in bed and read a book?

Depends on who I am with and it depends on the book. Can’t I do both if I am with a great group of people and it is a really good book?

When in a large crowd, do you feel drained or energized?

It really depends on the day.

I know most personality tests and quizzes assume that you are either introverted or extroverted. However, if you are like me, you may have a place in between both categories. It really just depends on the day, how you woke up or how your week has been going.

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Some call us ambiverts, fake extroverts, pretend extroverts and extroverted introverts. Personally, I like extroverted introverts. It sounds cool. Regardless of how we are described, we do exist and here are three things we wish people would understand:

1. Our thoughts are running a million miles a minute. We are almost drowning in them

At times, we ask that you leave us alone with our thoughts. We are not trying to be rude but we can’t help but ignore people some days. There are days where we keep to ourselves because we could not be bothered to juggle socializing and keeping up with our own thoughts. Other days, we are too talkative because we have so many thoughts to share. It is almost like word vomit, we can’t stop and we are sorry. So, take us as we are. We are living in our thoughts and we don’t want to move out, ever.

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2. Since this goes hand in hand with the aforementioned, we do fall off the face of the earth.

We come back to Earth… eventually. Though we may be the life of the party, we like our alone time. Sometimes the silence is better. Especially after a long day of music, people talking, phones ringing and all the smiling, we often do like our alone time where we can just have a blank face and the sweet sound of… nothing. This can last sometimes for hours so don’t take it personally. Don’t think of it as a warning sign and don’t ask us what is wrong. Think of it as us recharging so we can be our charming, smiling, attached to our phones, people-loving selves again.

3. Small Talk

We can do it, we can talk about rain and sun. We can talk about the traffic, prices of gas or upcoming local events. In fact, we are fantastic at it. We know it pleases the general public and we know that is what most people really want from us anyways. We are the talkative waitress, barista or customer service representative. It bothers us immensely when the conversation is not genuine but life goes on. We go back home to the ones we can have deep conversations with and come back the next day to start all over with small talk with strangers.

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All in all, we wish that people would stop putting us in one category or the other. We don’t care if there aren’t any Facebook Quizzes geared towards our category (though, that’d be nice) or if we fit perfectly into the normal two. We don’t care much about how much the sun is shining this week or how awful the traffic was on your way to us (unless you have a really dramatic story) We care if we get our much needed silence to recharge, our meaningful conversations, our family not placing out a police report if we fall off the face of the earth and our friends dealing with our word vomit.

Featured photo credit: Group Of People Socialising In Front Of Eifel Tower At Night by Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Margielyn Musser

Event And Volunteer Coordinator / World Traveler

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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