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5 Actions To Take When Adulthood Breaks You Down

5 Actions To Take When Adulthood Breaks You Down

My twenties have brought transitions in and out of jobs, relationships, careers, friends, homes and cities. There were times when I believed my life was completely on track, feeling an immense pride in my accomplishments and facing the day with a contagious energy and happy spirit.

But there were also times when I felt like I didn’t have a clue what I was doing; when I wondered if I should even bother getting out of bed in the morning. Never before had I experienced such a whirlwind of emotions, sometimes even within the same day.

Its been a profound experience to reach this place where I could somehow believe the world is full of possibilities while simultaneously feeling so trapped I could suffocate. These past few years have forced me into doing some self-exploration to get closer to discovering who I am and what I want out of life. I have done some real digging to learn how to navigate through these periods of uncertainty without falling apart.

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What I have found is this: negative self-talk is what propels that downward spiral of questioning my life choices, wondering what my dreams will amount to, and feeling fear for the vast future ahead.

And, more importantly, I am beginning to realize that the strength of this negative self-talk grows from the weakness of my soul. Because our soul is where our authenticity truly thrives; it is that place in the center of our being that will guide us exactly where we need to be if we can simply quiet our minds. Once we get to this place, that negative self-talk loses its credibility.

In the past few years, these are the tangible actions that have brought me more clarity, quieted my mind, and strengthened my soul when adulthood became too much to bear:

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1. Beginning a day with yoga

The breath and the moving meditation of yoga allows me to re-center. It trains my mind to focus on the subtle shifting of my body, on the way it feels to breathe deep down into my core. This forces me to stop thinking about everything else and instead, to just be.

2. Writing or journaling

I let out all of the negativity that is floating around in my mind. I sit with these words for awhile before I find a way to reframe them into something positive. This positivity is what I choose to take with me moving forward.

 3. Confiding in others

When I say those self-defeating words out loud, I watch them fall gently to the ground; they suddenly don’t seem so invincible anymore.

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4. Traveling

Jumping head first into a new environment is one of the most freeing feelings I’ve ever known. It allows me to become so immersed in the present moment that I escape my mind and find solace in the world surrounding me, putting life back into perspective.

 5. Chasing my passions.

When I do this, even as a hobby, my heart and soul are too filled with happiness to even peek out the window when negativity knocks.

I am beginning to realize that even during times with no clarity, we can create clarity. Feeling lost doesn’t need to result in feeling weak and feeling weak doesn’t mean that we have to fall apart. I have learned that as my soul grows larger, stronger and louder, my negative thinking cowers. It has less impact on my happiness and its message goes unnoticed.

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So like an ex-lover weighing you down, choose to ditch that negativity. Instead, view these years as an opportunity for self-discovery. Recognize that this time of feeling lost can be a stepping stone into a future that aligns more closely with your authentic self.

It is when we are at our most vulnerable that we have the greatest opportunity to make meaningful changes. So spend your time identifying the actions that bring you clarity and inner peace – and create space in your life to do them.

Featured photo credit: Stokpic via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on August 12, 2019

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life.

Take a look at these 13 things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become mentally stronger.

1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves

Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.

2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power

They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.

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3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change

Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.

4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control

You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.

5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.

6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks

They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.

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7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past

Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it.

However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.

8. They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over

Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.

9. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.

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10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure

Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.

11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time

Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive.

They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.

12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything

Mentally strong people don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.

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13. They Don’t Expect Immediate Results

Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time.

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Featured photo credit: Candice Picard via unsplash.com

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